How to be the perfect gay guy

I am getting a bit obsessed with how to become the best gay guy, as I feel that the odds are stacked against me in the dating world. I'm really craving a relationship and am wanting to be as good as I can.

Does anyone have some tips?

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Reply 1

username3824906

Original post by Anonymous

I'm not a gay male but it's like with any relationships: mutual respect, Love, trust and feelings, only other thing is not being ashamed of being gay or being with the guy.

Reply 2

Imanidiotpleaseh

This is stupid. Gay people shouldn’t be held up to different standards to straight people. I think I’d find it absurd if someone had written- how to be the perfect straight guy.

Not cool.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Imanidiotpleaseh

This is stupid. Gay people shouldn’t be held up to different standards to straight people. I think I’d find it absurd if someone had written- how to be the perfect straight guy.

Not cool.

Being straight and gay is a different playing ground. My goal is to see exactly what gay guys look for, and try to be the best that I can be. Standards can be high in the gay community.

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

By going out with me <3

Reply 5

Imanidiotpleaseh

Original post by Anonymous

Being straight and gay is a different playing ground. My goal is to see exactly what gay guys look for, and try to be the best that I can be. Standards can be high in the gay community.

Lol, is that what you’ve heard? You’ve not got much experience in the dating game I see.

Just be the best version of yourself and you’ll find someone right for you. The gay community is just a hetrogenous as the straight one. There’s nothing more to it.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Imanidiotpleaseh

I am trying to change myself as much as I can to give myself the best chance. I would have no chance in the gay community.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

I'm also thinking of how to act as gay as I can. This is mostly so people can guess my sexuality, which might make coming out a bit smoother. I know that some people don't like stereotypes, but they are often valid.

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

So you want to meet someone in real life to form a relationship with?

Acting gay to make them pick up on it and hopefully be attracted to you?

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

So you want to meet someone in real life to form a relationship with?

Acting gay to make them pick up on it and hopefully be attracted to you?

Yeah - you could say it like that. I'm also trying to make myself as attractive as I can, although that is tough. Hoping that I can find someone one day.

Reply 10

cat_mac

Original post by Anonymous

I am trying to change myself as much as I can to give myself the best chance. I would have no chance in the gay community.

The best thing you can be is yourself. If you try and be fake, you’re surrounded by people who faked who they were for a large part of their lives. Being out and in the gay community is meant to be a sigh of relief, a “I can finally be myself”.

A great tip is volunteering at pride, best way to meet new people who are active in the community and it’s such a fun experience! My first irl LGBT+ friends are from pride, gets you out into the club scene too if your straight friends dont want to go with you.

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

Original post by Imanidiotpleaseh

You're actually a lost cause.

Thanks. Best wishes to you too!

Reply 12

Anonymous #2

Here's a big tip, don't use gay dating apps namely grindr

Just make sure you're hygienic and clean by taking care of yourself

It may be unattractive to try and act gay using stereotypes so I'd just recommend being yourself, maybe hint at people you're into that you're gay and they may catch on

Reply 13

Vertigo_descent

Original post by Anonymous

Yeah, the minute I see a "stereotypical" gay guy I just lose interest, even if they're attractive.

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Grindr is definitely a no-go zone for me. I do get some good laughs looking at Grindr Messages on YouTube, but it is full of dodgy guys.

I'm not really sure how to make the fact that I am gay obvious without being a complete flamer.

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

Original post by cat_mac

Not got friends, so launching into the gay community is probably a good idea. I wish that I could go to Pride without my parents knowing. Hopefully one day soon.

I agree that being out must be a really nice feeling, but I want to be the best that I can be, and if that means changing myself a bit, then I might have to. I can't picture anyone loving the person that I am today.

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

Original post by TCA2b

Yeah, the minute I see a "stereotypical" gay guy I just lose interest, even if they're attractive.

So, what would you suggest as a good idea? I am guessing that you are gay judging on that post.

Reply 17

Anonymous #2

Could wear a shirt saying you're gay?

All you can really do is get to know someone and tell them that you're gay if you trust and like them

But then you'd have to find out if they're gay so it's hard..

Reply 18

_Fergo

Original post by Anonymous

My perfect guy is funny but measured - doesn't go too far to make me laugh, but it comes out naturally.

He's playful but also respectful - I love being touchy and whatnot and the other person appreciating my presence, but with limits - i.e understanding limits and the need to not always be physical.

He listens and understands, and is also willing to be open with me and trust me with his thoughts.

Be kind to others and willing to meet new people.

Be willing to explore things he's never done before.

Tbh many more things could be said. 'Perfect' is a very, very high standard to aim for. Just be yourself and try to find out what the other guy is interested in - it's all contextual in the end.

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