I hate my life
I feel so lost in my life right now, I hate my job and I don't have friends at the moment. I do not have a focus career wise. I have no friends, I was doing so well before and then everything went wrong. having bad advice from elder siblings to not take certain career paths that I wanted such as radiography. I was then meant to be a teacher but was too nervous. I didn't end up applying for grad schemes, I am just working full time in a career which has no appeal to me. I really want to be successful and I am someone who wanted to do a long a career after my degree. I see so my peers who used to mess about and did degrees such as accounting and now earning alot even though I did a very hard academic subject. I think my lack of confidence and happiness impacts me that I do not get what I want. I don't know what I want and how to start a new life or make most of what I studied instead of regret what I chose
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In your defense, you'll have plenty of people to compare where you are doing much much better...
Simply don't compare yourself to your peers. Some will be always better than you and some will always be woser-er than you.
Friends will come and go. I am also working full time in a career which has no appeal to me. But I have spend last few months planning (meticulously if i may say so) to exit the industry and run my own gig. You should consider doing this as well (plan your exit strategy to concentrate on getting what appeals to you)
Yes, happiness eludes you because you think of the "dark" sides of your situation. But the truth is there are lot of positives that you haven't appreciated or realized. Take my case, I can paint a story that can be horrific, or terrific, all based on my recent life experience. You should be able to do it too.
Simply don't compare yourself to your peers. Some will be always better than you and some will always be woser-er than you.
Friends will come and go. I am also working full time in a career which has no appeal to me. But I have spend last few months planning (meticulously if i may say so) to exit the industry and run my own gig. You should consider doing this as well (plan your exit strategy to concentrate on getting what appeals to you)
Yes, happiness eludes you because you think of the "dark" sides of your situation. But the truth is there are lot of positives that you haven't appreciated or realized. Take my case, I can paint a story that can be horrific, or terrific, all based on my recent life experience. You should be able to do it too.
Original post by Anonymous
I feel so lost in my life right now, I hate my job and I don't have friends at the moment. I do not have a focus career wise. I have no friends, I was doing so well before and then everything went wrong. having bad advice from elder siblings to not take certain career paths that I wanted such as radiography. I was then meant to be a teacher but was too nervous. I didn't end up applying for grad schemes, I am just working full time in a career which has no appeal to me. I really want to be successful and I am someone who wanted to do a long a career after my degree. I see so my peers who used to mess about and did degrees such as accounting and now earning alot even though I did a very hard academic subject. I think my lack of confidence and happiness impacts me that I do not get what I want. I don't know what I want and how to start a new life or make most of what I studied instead of regret what I chose
I think one of the worst things you can do is compare your life to others.
Factors and variables that have interplayed on how their life pans out will be completely different to yours. Some people are dealt awful hands in life and therefore struggle to pursue a decent career or even further education in a specific field, which only makes them look upon what others have achieved.
You’ve got a career. It may not be something that interests you, but it’s an income. Some people can only wish for that. I’m not saying you’re ungrateful at all, but it could be a heck of a lot worse as it has been for many graduates I’ve seen leaving education to pursue the job world.
At least this career is giving you a drive to find something else, something you feel like you could enjoy and progress in. Use it as your basis to explore, skill-up, and practice to pursue a newfound career. Even if that means adding to your educational portfolio!
My friend has an excellent masters degree but yet can not find a single career within his field and that’s completely normal!
I would suggest removing yourself (not completely) from social media for a bit, it only drives jealously and bitterness in my opinion, look into the modules you enjoyed and other academic areas of study you excelled in. Use these as a basis to form ideas on possible pursuits, even minimal ones (could even be volunteering!). Little steps are not a bad thing. Life is a marathon not a spring remember, what one person could be doing may look great but they could be inwardly tired and miserable and actually hate their job! Who’s to say they won’t trip and fall at some point and find themselves 20 spaces behind everyone else! You’ll never know what cards life deals until you start exploring and try your best to put the blinkers on to remove any kind of seed of doubt that you may plant in your head by looking at what peers are doing.
You have years to figure it out remember! Most people at 30 still do not know what their career or future holds, and statistics say a young person will career change at least 8 times before they settle into something they enjoy. Hope this helped!
Original post by TaintedLight
In your defense, you'll have plenty of people to compare where you are doing much much better...
Simply don't compare yourself to your peers. Some will be always better than you and some will always be woser-er than you.
Friends will come and go. I am also working full time in a career which has no appeal to me. But I have spend last few months planning (meticulously if i may say so) to exit the industry and run my own gig. You should consider doing this as well (plan your exit strategy to concentrate on getting what appeals to you)
Yes, happiness eludes you because you think of the "dark" sides of your situation. But the truth is there are lot of positives that you haven't appreciated or realized. Take my case, I can paint a story that can be horrific, or terrific, all based on my recent life experience. You should be able to do it too.
Simply don't compare yourself to your peers. Some will be always better than you and some will always be woser-er than you.
Friends will come and go. I am also working full time in a career which has no appeal to me. But I have spend last few months planning (meticulously if i may say so) to exit the industry and run my own gig. You should consider doing this as well (plan your exit strategy to concentrate on getting what appeals to you)
Yes, happiness eludes you because you think of the "dark" sides of your situation. But the truth is there are lot of positives that you haven't appreciated or realized. Take my case, I can paint a story that can be horrific, or terrific, all based on my recent life experience. You should be able to do it too.
I find it hard not compare myself, I am close to quitting my job this week but I don't have a concrete plan of what I will do.
I am really getting down because everyone has their group of friends but I don't. Even when I go to weddings I see the bride and her close friends and I realise I will not have anyone to invite when I get married.
Original post by Lily048
I think one of the worst things you can do is compare your life to others.
Factors and variables that have interplayed on how their life pans out will be completely different to yours. Some people are dealt awful hands in life and therefore struggle to pursue a decent career or even further education in a specific field, which only makes them look upon what others have achieved.
You’ve got a career. It may not be something that interests you, but it’s an income. Some people can only wish for that. I’m not saying you’re ungrateful at all, but it could be a heck of a lot worse as it has been for many graduates I’ve seen leaving education to pursue the job world.
At least this career is giving you a drive to find something else, something you feel like you could enjoy and progress in. Use it as your basis to explore, skill-up, and practice to pursue a newfound career. Even if that means adding to your educational portfolio!
My friend has an excellent masters degree but yet can not find a single career within his field and that’s completely normal!
I would suggest removing yourself (not completely) from social media for a bit, it only drives jealously and bitterness in my opinion, look into the modules you enjoyed and other academic areas of study you excelled in. Use these as a basis to form ideas on possible pursuits, even minimal ones (could even be volunteering!). Little steps are not a bad thing. Life is a marathon not a spring remember, what one person could be doing may look great but they could be inwardly tired and miserable and actually hate their job! Who’s to say they won’t trip and fall at some point and find themselves 20 spaces behind everyone else! You’ll never know what cards life deals until you start exploring and try your best to put the blinkers on to remove any kind of seed of doubt that you may plant in your head by looking at what peers are doing.
You have years to figure it out remember! Most people at 30 still do not know what their career or future holds, and statistics say a young person will career change at least 8 times before they settle into something they enjoy. Hope this helped!
Factors and variables that have interplayed on how their life pans out will be completely different to yours. Some people are dealt awful hands in life and therefore struggle to pursue a decent career or even further education in a specific field, which only makes them look upon what others have achieved.
You’ve got a career. It may not be something that interests you, but it’s an income. Some people can only wish for that. I’m not saying you’re ungrateful at all, but it could be a heck of a lot worse as it has been for many graduates I’ve seen leaving education to pursue the job world.
At least this career is giving you a drive to find something else, something you feel like you could enjoy and progress in. Use it as your basis to explore, skill-up, and practice to pursue a newfound career. Even if that means adding to your educational portfolio!
My friend has an excellent masters degree but yet can not find a single career within his field and that’s completely normal!
I would suggest removing yourself (not completely) from social media for a bit, it only drives jealously and bitterness in my opinion, look into the modules you enjoyed and other academic areas of study you excelled in. Use these as a basis to form ideas on possible pursuits, even minimal ones (could even be volunteering!). Little steps are not a bad thing. Life is a marathon not a spring remember, what one person could be doing may look great but they could be inwardly tired and miserable and actually hate their job! Who’s to say they won’t trip and fall at some point and find themselves 20 spaces behind everyone else! You’ll never know what cards life deals until you start exploring and try your best to put the blinkers on to remove any kind of seed of doubt that you may plant in your head by looking at what peers are doing.
You have years to figure it out remember! Most people at 30 still do not know what their career or future holds, and statistics say a young person will career change at least 8 times before they settle into something they enjoy. Hope this helped!
yea true but also I get compared to more successful siblings in my family and I get more hopeless that I failed at things they succeeded in. I have deleted my social media and I even.stoped being social as I hot depressed hearing about how great things other people are doing.
Original post by Anonymous
I find it hard not compare myself, I am close to quitting my job this week but I don't have a concrete plan of what I will do.
I am really getting down because everyone has their group of friends but I don't. Even when I go to weddings I see the bride and her close friends and I realise I will not have anyone to invite when I get married.
I am really getting down because everyone has their group of friends but I don't. Even when I go to weddings I see the bride and her close friends and I realise I will not have anyone to invite when I get married.
Sure it's not all rosy right now, but who is to say that can't change? Isn't getting invited to weddings better than not getting invited to weddings? And if its not too late I strongly suggest not to quit unless you got something lined up.
Original post by TaintedLight
Sure it's not all rosy right now, but who is to say that can't change? Isn't getting invited to weddings better than not getting invited to weddings? And if its not too late I strongly suggest not to quit unless you got something lined up.
I plan on resigning tomorrow, I have no friends at work, every day is an eternity, I hate the work. money is only good thing but I can't do it anymore. I stuck in there for 3 years and now it's enough for me. although I need the money I cannot mentally do the work as I am too miserable.
Original post by TaintedLight
Sure it's not all rosy right now, but who is to say that can't change? Isn't getting invited to weddings better than not getting invited to weddings? And if its not too late I strongly suggest not to quit unless you got something lined up.
Ny mum was the one who got invited and they invited the rest of the family too.
I just keep thinking that ever since I have been treated like an outcast due to some bullying years ago, nothing has worked out for me because my social skills declined, you need social support to succeed sometimes. It affected my confidence even now. I know it sounds insane to think something years ago can impact you. But it has for me.
I never got into medicine, dentistry, pharmacy etc.. and sometimes in life you gotta hustle and find alternative ways to succeed rather than traditional careers, I recently tabbed into property investment which was 1 good thing my elder siblings taught me. however being youngest me and I have never found my own way in life and just copy everyon. I hate that inhavent become successful on my own. I majority lack confidence now
Friends, happiness, it all comes with hard work. You said you wanted a long career after your degree, is it for the degree that you actually studied? If it is then you can still follow the career you want. If you want to be a teacher then you still can be with the training. You have to do what ever it takes to succeed, if that is what makes you happy. If you need inspiration I recommend watching the film ''The pursuit of happyness'' a pretty big film based on a true story. It tells the story of how a man turned his life around through his hard work, determination, belief and desire. If you want something badly then you have to pursue that relentlessly until you've got what you set out for, this applies for happiness and friendship too.
Original post by Lily048
What job do you do OP? Curious as to why the money is good and you’ve stuck it out 3 years yet profusely hate it
a role in the civil service
Original post by ninjay
Friends, happiness, it all comes with hard work. You said you wanted a long career after your degree, is it for the degree that you actually studied? If it is then you can still follow the career you want. If you want to be a teacher then you still can be with the training. You have to do what ever it takes to succeed, if that is what makes you happy. If you need inspiration I recommend watching the film ''The pursuit of happyness'' a pretty big film based on a true story. It tells the story of how a man turned his life around through his hard work, determination, belief and desire. If you want something badly then you have to pursue that relentlessly until you've got what you set out for, this applies for happiness and friendship too.
there were things that happned that stoped me becoming a teacher to someone close to me so it was put off it.
I still get upset that I never made it into medical related careers. I can be business minded and working for a firm and some sort of amnagemtn where I am actually on site is what I like but that's vague I know. I did psychology degree but that is a long route for becoming psychologist. I am prepared to work hard. I struggle to make friends at university maybe it was just the particular university, I didn't stay on campus, but it makes alot of difference
Original post by Anonymous
a role in the civil service
Scary as I’ve just applied for a load of civil service jobs, why do you hate it? Can you be more specific? Also what degree did you do?
I think you should go for the psychologist route, you're prepared to work hard and have very little to lose. I suggest joining some sort of club, you'll make friends very easily because the people at the club probably joined the club for the same reason as you so you're all in the same boat, and you can try reconnecting with old friends from before university. I'm at uni and am still very close to my school friends lol so if I just need someone to talk to I can always reconnect to my old friends, I think you should try these things. Also, I think property investment is a good career even if you are copying your siblings because sometimes you just have to do whats practical and if it earns you good money and if that is what makes you successful then people will naturally want to be around you, because you'll be happy.
Original post by Lily048
Scary as I’ve just applied for a load of civil service jobs, why do you hate it? Can you be more specific? Also what degree did you do?
you'll be fine, most people love it, I am just a bit weird. I did psychology
Original post by ninjay
I think you should go for the psychologist route, you're prepared to work hard and have very little to lose. I suggest joining some sort of club, you'll make friends very easily because the people at the club probably joined the club for the same reason as you so you're all in the same boat, and you can try reconnecting with old friends from before university. I'm at uni and am still very close to my school friends lol so if I just need someone to talk to I can always reconnect to my old friends, I think you should try these things. Also, I think property investment is a good career even if you are copying your siblings because sometimes you just have to do whats practical and if it earns you good money and if that is what makes you successful then people will naturally want to be around you, because you'll be happy.
yea early days of property investment so hopefully will go well.
i know being successul, focused and happy attracts friends.
Friends are not the be all and end all, trust me
I currently have no friends but used to have some but they were fake friends so now I feel better off with no friends.
I currently have no friends but used to have some but they were fake friends so now I feel better off with no friends.
Original post by Anonymous
you'll be fine, most people love it, I am just a bit weird. I did psychology
Oh okay haha. What makes you think you’re weird? Just because you don’t enjoy your job doesn’t make you weird surely?
Original post by Lily048
Oh okay haha. What makes you think you’re weird? Just because you don’t enjoy your job doesn’t make you weird surely?
idk I was all excited about wanting to work in government but any role I've had I've been bad at and struggle to mix in. I also struggle to apply for promotions as I do not get what interviewers wants and what my end goal in civil service is. I've kind of just become soo bored and feel like I am really not understanding anything. I wish I was good at it. I'm weird as I've become anti social which is so important to enjoy going work, and I get overwhelmed working around senior people not sure why.my work ethic just doesn't show and I come across as lazy slob.
Original post by Anonymous
idk I was all excited about wanting to work in government but any role I've had I've been bad at and struggle to mix in. I also struggle to apply for promotions as I do not get what interviewers wants and what my end goal in civil service is. I've kind of just become soo bored and feel like I am really not understanding anything. I wish I was good at it. I'm weird as I've become anti social which is so important to enjoy going work, and I get overwhelmed working around senior people not sure why.my work ethic just doesn't show and I come across as lazy slob.
Did any such traits show themselves during your degree? E.g doing work close to the deadlines, late hand ins, bad attendance? It’s harder to apply yourself in a job where you are surrounded by seniors however that’s a good way to get into promotions because they are more likely to back up your application. But after 3 years if you still feel this down about it maybe you do need a change of scenery
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