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Age gaps- teens dating vs marriage

When you are in school, why do people find it weird to date someone 1/2 years older/younger, but when you marry someone 5 years older/younger it's normal?
Because people in school are younger. A 15 year old dating a 13 year old is seen as disturbing as they’re in different stages in life. Whereas a 21 and 23 year old marrying is seen as okay as they’re both adults in the same stage in life.
Original post by Angel_Chen
When you are in school, why do people find it weird to date someone 1/2 years older/younger, but when you marry someone 5 years older/younger it's normal?


Because there's a big difference in a 14 and 17 year old dating compared to a 34 and 37 year old in terms of maturity and life stages.
General view is that you're zooming up the maturity ranks dead fast when you're young. The average 15 year old is supposed to leave the average 13 year old well behind in that regard. In practice of course it doesn't work like that for every case but people can't get what usually is the case out of their heads, and thus one appears weird. Once you're well into adulthood tho, any 'maturity' gaps tend to close quite a lot, so age gaps tend to be less problematic.

Also if you're 16, you're above age of consent, so trying to get with people that are under such age is bound to raise some eyebrows.
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Original post by Abcdefghijk123
Because people in school are younger. A 15 year old dating a 13 year old is seen as disturbing as they’re in different stages in life. Whereas a 21 and 23 year old marrying is seen as okay as they’re both adults in the same stage in life.


Original post by DrawTheLine
Because there's a big difference in a 14 and 17 year old dating compared to a 34 and 37 year old in terms of maturity and life stages.


I never thought about people being at different stages in their life. My opinion has always been, if they're happy and healthy, I'm happy for them. My friend (16) went out with a 13 year old, they made a cute couple although I didn't work out. (I'm biased as I helped bring them together as they both obviously liked each other :P)
What do you think of this situation?
Original post by Angel_Chen
I never thought about people being at different stages in their life. My opinion has always been, if they're happy and healthy, I'm happy for them. My friend (16) went out with a 13 year old, they made a cute couple although I didn't work out. (I'm biased as I helped bring them together as they both obviously liked each other :P)
What do you think of this situation?


I think that's very strange. A 16 year old is almost an adult, and has pretty much finished puberty. A 13 year old has barely started puberty and hasn't even started GCSEs. If they were 23 and 26, absolutely fine.
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Original post by Retired_Messiah
General view is that you're zooming up the maturity ranks dead fast when you're young. The average 15 year old is supposed to leave the average 13 year old well behind in that regard. In practice of course it doesn't work like that for every case but people can't get what usually is the case out of their heads, and thus one appears weird. Once you're well into adulthood tho, any 'maturity' gaps tend to close quite a lot, so age gaps tend to be less problematic.

Also if you're 16, you're above age of consent, so trying to get with people that are under such age is bound to raise some eyebrows.


I don't understand sex at a young age, not only would you be breaking the law, but there is also the chance of pregnancy which could impact your education.
Original post by Angel_Chen
When you are in school, why do people find it weird to date someone 1/2 years older/younger, but when you marry someone 5 years older/younger it's normal?


As others have said as adults as long as your life goals and maturity match up you don't notice a difference.
Original post by Angel_Chen
I don't understand sex at a young age, not only would you be breaking the law, but there is also the chance of pregnancy which could impact your education.


If both parties are underage the police tend not to care unless an accusation of rape gets thrown in from somewhere, so the law breaking aspect in that particular kind of case is basically irrelevant. Suppose chance of pregnancy is technically a problem, but no less of one than it would be for 18 year old uni students who wouldn't be underage.

End of the day tho, peeps like sex.
Original post by Angel_Chen
I never thought about people being at different stages in their life. My opinion has always been, if they're happy and healthy, I'm happy for them. My friend (16) went out with a 13 year old, they made a cute couple although I didn't work out. (I'm biased as I helped bring them together as they both obviously liked each other :P)
What do you think of this situation?

By different life stages I mean, with the 13 and 16 year old, one pretty much just left primary school and the other one could be in sixth form, which to me, seems a little strange. Like what does the 16 year old want with someone so young?

To me the situation is a bit weird, but I agree that as long as they’re happy, and there’s no sex involved, fine. As soon as sex is involved it becomes illegal and statutory rape. Statutory rape isn’t an issue with older couples.
Original post by Abcdefghijk123
By different life stages I mean, with the 13 and 16 year old, one pretty much just left primary school and the other one could be in sixth form, which to me, seems a little strange. Like what does the 16 year old want with someone so young?

To me the situation is a bit weird, but I agree that as long as they’re happy, and there’s no sex involved, fine. As soon as sex is involved it becomes illegal and statutory rape. Statutory rape isn’t an issue with older couples.


Both were friends through church for ages and they are still in the same friendship group, there's only so many around that age group.
maturity levels are different, different places in life, ones just beginning to learn new experiences whereas the other has already gone through it all and probably wants to settle down
Original post by Angel_Chen
Both were friends through church for ages and they are still in the same friendship group, there's only so many around that age group.


Okay. Like I said, as long as they weren’t having sex, fine.

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