Abortion advice?

I have an abortion booked in for tomorrow afternoon but I am so nervous to have it done. My mum is coming with me to get it done, and I will be staying at her house afterwards for a couple of days. My partner isn’t happy with my decision so does not want to be involved with the process. He says there is no reason why we couldn’t have a child, but I’m not ready! I just wondered if anyone has any experiences with abortions that they could share? And what do people make of abortions? I want to make sure that I am making the right choice. All opinions are welcome, but please be respectful, as this is a very difficult choice to have to make.

Reply 1

Claire461

Original post by Anonymous

The responses you get here will very much depend on the stance people will take about abortion - for or against - which won't be much help to you in your situation. Only you can make that decision for yourself and you are lucky to have your Mum to support you at this really difficult time for you. If you feel you are not ready then you do what you think is best for you and if your partner really loves you, he will too. X

Reply 2

Abby Barford

You need to focus on you more than anything. If you feel that you are not ready then that is reason enough not to and you shouldn't feel pressured into doing it. Having a child is a massive commitment and you don't really 'get your life back' as such until they've moved out, which could be when they're 18, 25 etc. Regardless of your age, if you're not ready, don't do it. You clearly have doubt about it, but just forget about your mum, boyfriend and whoever else, and think 'can I see myself having a baby in 8-9 months?' You've also got to determine if you'll be financially stable in that time and if you'll get any help if you won't be, whether you'd be able to provide for the child and give it the best life possible. I hope this helped :smile:

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

i had an abortion years ago and it wasn't a hard decision for me, at all (and at the time i didn't know i was pro-choice. i hadn't thought about it much until suddenly i had to make that decision).

i never once felt sad about it and i know the vast majority of women don't. you can google it. don't let anyone tell you otherwise, they don't know what they're talking about!!

no reason to be nervous, the people at the clinic understand the situation and i'm sure they will be very nice and caring. before you know it, it'll all be over with. then relief.

Reply 4

DrawTheLine

Original post by Anonymous

You've said you aren't ready for a baby therefore it is the right choice for you. The opinions of people here do not matter one tiny bit.

Reply 5

DrMikeHuntHertz

Have the baby then give it up for adoption if your "not ready", there really is no excuse for abortion unless for obvious medical reasons.

Reply 6

Anonymous #3

I have no idea, cause I've never been in this situation myself but it's up to you it's your body at the end of the day and no one can tell you what you can or cannot do with it. I can kind of see why your partner is not happy though as the baby was just as much his as it is yours; but at the end of the day people's opinions don't matter as its your choice.

Reply 7

benevolent123

Depending on how far a long you are in your pregnancy it can be extremely hard to move past. I was 23 weeks when i had a surgical abortion. When i decided to go through with it i was postive i wanted the termination, however after all i did was cry. The nurses at the clinic were also like robots not compassionate to my situation at all. Nonetheless, this was just my expierence. Like others have said its your body and unfortunately its all your decision, id just make sure your 100 percent before you go through with it.

Reply 8

Go_getter

I never understood why people say they are not ready to conceive but have sex protected or otherwise. No contraceptive is 100% effective. Too many see abortion as a quick fix. I look at my 4 year old grandson and thank God that my daughter did not abort him because he is such a wonderful delightful little boy and I cannot help but wonder how many lovely little boys and girls did not even get the chance to grace the world with their loveliness due to no fault of their own. What an absolute sad world we live in. I am of the belief that God does not burden a soul more than it can bear and he gives us things for a reason whether we see the reason or not. Be patient with EVERY situation.

(edited 5 years ago)

Reply 9

Anonymous #4

Can't understand people who are aborting and have no health or mental issues that may validate that. Their choice at the end of the day, but in my own view, it is sickening and cruel.

Reply 10

Haviland-Tuf

Why do you think you are not ready? Imagine you can’t have a baby the next time you think you are ready. What if your husband resents you for the rest of your marriag3?

Reply 11

bones-mccoy

Original post by Go_getter

Original post by Anonymous

Can't understand people who are aborting and have no health or mental issues that may validate that. Their choice at the end of the day, but in my own view, it is sickening and cruel.

Original post by Haviland-Tuf

Why do you think you are not ready? Imagine you can’t have a baby the next time you think you are ready. What if your husband resents you for the rest of your marriag3?

Original post by DrMikeHuntHertz

Have the baby then give it up for adoption if your "not ready", there really is no excuse for abortion unless for obvious medical reasons.

None of these responses are relevant. OP has already stated that she's decided to have an abortion so stop trying to make her feel worse about a situation that is obviously very distressing to begin with. This is not a thread to try and change her mind. Take your preaching elsewhere.

Reply 12

Go_getter

Original post by bones-mccoy

I suggest you read the original post again "And what do people make of abortions? I want to make sure that I am making the right choice. " Not a done deal yet.
Abortion should not be used as birth control. We should live with the consequences of our actions then learn by them. I am not here to win friends I am here to give MY viewpoint whether that leaves a bitter taste in ones mouth or not. As for preaching, I preach to no one and for those that think I am I guess they are at war with their own conscience. Wishing you a great day.

(edited 5 years ago)

Reply 13

username47781

Polite reminder this is not a debate section about abortion please do that elsewhere in the debate section, at the end of the day it is down to the OP what they decide.

Reply 14

DrMikeHuntHertz

Original post by bones-mccoy

So decisions to abort are based on feeling not logic/reasoning?

Reply 15

SmileyVibe

I recommend writing down reasons on a piece of paper of why you think you should get an abortion. Maybe writing or doing some journal will help you reflect and think about the "pros" and "cons". If you are not ready, you should probably go with your gut. 9 months is a long time and babies require lots of money but if you can think you can find a way to make it work, that's fine too.

Also whether to get an abortion or not, is really on you and the situation you know are in. None of the negative comments are you. Good luck.

Reply 16

bones-mccoy

Original post by Go_getter

OP made another post previously stating that she wanted an abortion but her partner was threatening to kick her out if she got one. How do you know OP wasn't using birth control to begin with? No birth control is 100% effective anyway so accidents do always have the potential to happen. No one should be shamed just because they pick an option you personally don't agree with.