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Reply 80

DrawTheLine

Original post by CheeseIsVeg

Well you're awesome so ofc :awesome:

Reply 81

lydiarutharnold

Original post by DrawTheLine

26th April 2018

Today has been epic! :excited:

I'm super proud of myself. :grin:

Today started off how it has the other few days, waking up at 7 but still feeling really tired. :sad:

I slept at 11 last night instead of a bit earlier like I said because I wanted to chat to my boyfriend a bit more. I had some tea after I got up at 7:30 :tea:

, and then it was time for laundry. 3 loads in the washing machines and 2 loads in the tumble dryer - £12 that cost me! :shock:

Not happy about that. :nope:

I had to wash my bedding, towels and clothes. Even so, one of the tumble dryers should be called a tumbler, not a dryer, because it didn't dry anything. :mad:

It just tumbled them around for 50 minutes. My room at uni is so small so I use the dryer to avoid having to hang my clothes up on an airer, but I still have to do that anyway. So that annoyed me quite a bit. :hmpf:

But it's okay because it means tonight is clean sheet night, and eveyone know that clean sheet night is one of the best nights there is. :thumbsup:

After I put my clothes in the dryer / tumbler, I had a shower. I wasn't really too hungry so breakfast again was just cashew nuts and water. Maybe a few M&Ms too. :teehee:

I started memorising some of those studies. I find I memorise things best by just writing and rewriting it over and over again. When my clothes were done I either put them away or hung them up to dry (grr). :grumble:

By noon I had successfully memorised my 10 studies in order to get my hot chocolate from Costa, which made me super happy for the rest of the day. :yeah:

Just knowing those studies has made me so much more confident for the exam. I'm still terrified, but I have a bit more reassurance that I can chuck some accurate dates in there and hopefully boost my marks a bit. I have one hour to write each essay (2 hours in total), which is more time than I think. I just need to keep telling myself I have lots of time. :yy:

I can spend 5 minutes planning and then the rest writing. I need to make sure my writing will be readable, as when I'm stressed I stop writing and start scribbling. As long as I can keep my nerves under control and remind myself I have time to correctly write an essay, I should be okay. I really hope I will be okay! :crossedf:

I remembered I had some eggs to eat that really do need eating as they're coming to the end of their recommended eat by date. I decided to be healthy and have an omelette. :cute:

I used 3 eggs and added spinach, yellow pepper and runner beans, plus a small grating of cheese and salt and pepper. It was decent, kept me full for a while. After lunch I went out to the big shopping centre to look for those mug cake mixes. There's a huge ASDA nearby so I thought they would have it - nope. :cry2:

So I went and got more flashcards instead. I went to town to look for them, and finally found a sticky toffee one and a rich chocolate one. I'm so happy! :woo:

I'll make one of them tonight, hopefully it'll be amazing. On my way back from town I got my awesome hot chocolate with marshmallows as a reward for memorising those studies. :drool:

I even started memorising some more. The bus to the big shopping centre takes about 40 minutes, so I had a bit of a flick through my flash cards.

When I got back I started working on memorising some others, and I think I've got 13 completely in my long term memory now. I'll do the same thing tomorrow but a bit more focused and getting more done. After all I have less than 6 days until my exam. And today means that in exactly 1 month I will be moving out and back home. I'm feeling bittersweet about that. :indiff:

I'm excited because it means I can see my mum and my cat, I can go back to work in my original store and see the people I like. However it means less freedom. I will not be able to call my boyfriend like I do now, which will really suck. :cry:

But it's less sucky because when I go back home, I'm only there for 3 weeks before I fly to see him for 6 weeks :lovehug:

, so we can push through that difficulty. Plus going back home my dad will moan at me for going to America, which I'm really not looking forward to. My flight is at 12:30 which means we have to leave for the airport at about 8am on the Saturday (we're only about 1.5 hours away from Heathrow). He won't enjoy getting up that early on a weekend, yet he gets up even earlier for a haircut so who knows what he will be like. :dontknow:

I was supposed to cook sweet and sour chicken for dinner tonight, but after my hot chocolate I'm really not that hungry. :dong:

So I think I'll just make some super rice later on when I am hungry and have some tea and cashew nuts again. I definitely need to make it tomorrow though otherwise my red pepper will start going moudly and I want to use it.

The rest of my evening will be chatting to my boyfriend and learning a few more studies. Oh and making that mug cake after all. I wish tomorrow was payday. I'm always looking forward to payday. :daydreaming:

Even on payday I say I'm excited for the next payday. :laugh:

I've said payday too many times it's stopped looking like a word, ha. Anyway, I think that's it for today.

Food diary!

Breakfast: cashew nuts
Lunch: omelette
Dinner: probably will be super rice
Snacks: M&Ms

Spoiler

bloomin love m&ms

Reply 82

DrawTheLine

Original post by laurawatt

you seem to be doing well! You'll smash that exam :yep:

Thank you! I'm really hoping I do because it'll give me so much more confidence :crossedf:

Reply 83

DrawTheLine

Original post by lydiarutharnold

bloomin love m&ms

They're one of my biggest weaknesses. I'm aiming to make a massive M&M cake this summer to hopefully satisfy my cravings for them.

Reply 84

DrawTheLine

Urgh I just realised I've been learning one of the studies as occurring in 2006 when it was actually in 2002. That's thrown me a bit. :s-smilie:

Reply 85

Know Your Enemy

Good luck with the exam on Wednesday! And keep up the good work. :h:

Reply 86

DrawTheLine

30th April 2018

I can no longer say "my exam is next week, I have loads of time" it's THIS WEEK. :eek:

That shouldn't be allowed, time needs to come with a big flashing neon sign saying "I'm nearly up". :blow:

However, for the today I can say my exam is next month, which is making me feel a bit better. :yy:

Loads of time, it's not until next month. It's all good. :yep:

But seriously, I'm super proud of myself today. I notice I've been saying that a lot, but I feel like I have a lot to be proud of now. :yes:

I've revised the entire module today. :yay:

I did 2 topics at a time then had a break. My thumb really aches after a while because of how I hold my pen (I'm a leftie so it'll be a bit weird) so I have to stop writing after about 45 minutes. :sigh:

I started work at 8:30 this morning and worked until about 11:30, with a few breaks in between of course. I was good and had cereal again this morning. Feeling proud of that too. :proud:

I finally went and paid my first months rent. Goodbye money. :puppyeyes:

But now I know how much I have left and I can think a bit more about a rough budget for the rest of my time at uni. I also went from the house I'm living in next year to the closest supermarket, which is actually further away than I thought. The bus comes every 20 minutes so that's a bit sucky. :hmmm:

If I come out with food shopping including raw meat etc. and I've just missed a bus, that'll be 20 minutes waiting. I could walk it, but it's still a bit of a distance with heavy shopping. I have a feeling I will be using Ubers a bit more often.

I started feeling a bit light-bodied on the way home :no:

so I had lunch as soon as I got back - leftover sweet and sour chicken. It wasn't that good because it's a few days old, so I ate about 3/4 of it. I had some almonds to nibble on in the afternoon so I wasn't hungry. After lunch I got on with some more revising, but then my messy flatmate came home and my heart sunk. :nooo:

He's been gone about a month but is back today. He said he was only coming back for exams so I'm hoping he won't be here long but the mess and noise has already begun. When I went in the kitchen to do my dinner grated cheese was everywhere. Apparently the place to keep your leftover grated cheese is on the floor and the counter. :mad2:

Because I caused an argument last time I told him to clean up, I just cleaned it up myself wishing he would go back home. I cannot be f*cked to try and convince this "adult" that he does in fact live with other people and therefore needs to clean up his sh*t. It's ruffled my feathers how much of a (insert word too rude for TSR here) he is. Grrr! :argh:

I had leftover butter chicken curry for dinner tonight. Tomorrow though I need to have a chicken wrap for lunch to use up that last chicken breast I have. I don't want it going bad because meat is expensive! It'll be delicious though. I love a good wrap. :drool:

When I was coming back from my adventure today, I saw an animal I had not seen there before. Opposite where I live there's this long line of terraced houses and they have a lot of grass in front of them, and there's often about 4 or 5 cats just chilling there. :biggrin:

Today though there was a turtle going for a stroll in the grass! :excited:

It's a lovely sunny day today, I guess they though "good day to bring the turtle out". I thought it was a rock until it moved. I really want a pet turtle. They're awesome. :turtle:

As for less cute animals, I almost had a heart attack a few hours ago. :eek3:

So I'm just typing away at my laptop on Quizlet doing revision. My window is right in front of my desk. I had previously thought about opening my window, but then thought it's a bit windy today so I won't. I think I saved my life by not opening my window. :shock:

A bee the size of a f*cking cherry tomato flew into my window at least a dozen times. :vroam:

It terrified me to my bones. Somehow I was thinking it would find a day to push the window open (genuinely, I'm very afraid of bees :hide:

). I've seen it flying around outside the past few hours now so I don't think I can ever open my window again. Also, a tiny spider was right in the middle of my window. It took me a lot of courage to poke at it with a pen to see if it was on the outside. It was, so that's a relief.

Spiders and bees are my two things I am scared of. 2 summers ago a bee landed on my chesticle :teehee:

and I shrieked a proper loud ear piercing shriek. My mum was with me and she said "bloody hell you are scared of them aren't you" (she doesn't believe things like this with me unless she sees it, but that's another story). I couldn't stop shaking and crying for a good 15 minutes. :thumbsdown:

It was only on me about a second, if that. I have never been so out of control of my own body as I was then. I will cross the road if I see a bee in front of me and I almost walked out in front of a car a week ago because of a bee. :erm:

They frighten me so much. Even just hearing a buzz (even from a fly) is enough to make me nervous and tense up.

I shudder at the thought of bees. Anyway, I'll move on because it's making me uneasy. I'm so proud of myself again today for this is my 2nd day chocolate free. :yeah:

I'm not trying to give up chocolate entirely, I'm just trying to give up buying chocolatey things to have in my house. If I buy chocolate biscuits or sweets, I will eat way too many. However, if like on Wednesday after my exam I get a hot chocolate from Costa, that's okay because I won't be bringing it home with me. :yep:

I don't want to buy any chocolate e.g. in my weekly shop because then I'll eat that instead of healthy stuff, hence why I bought the extra fruit this week. Go me! Let's see how long it will last. :hmmmm:

Food diary!

Breakfast: fruit and fibre cereal
Lunch: leftover sweet and sour chicken
Dinner: leftover butter chicken curry
Snacks: ready salted crisps, a pear and almonds

Spoiler

(edited 5 years ago)

Reply 87

username3902774

Summer plans? I remember you said you will visit your bf in the states!

Reply 88

DrawTheLine

Original post by Ucashelp

Summer plans? I remember you said you will visit your bf in the states!

Yep I'm going over there for 6 weeks :yeah:

and then when I'm back I will be working as close to full time as I can get until I go back to uni in September. I also intend on baking as much as I can too

Reply 89

CheeseIsVeg

Original post by DrawTheLine

Even just hearing a buzz (even from a fly) is enough to make me nervous and tense up.

omg I am exactly the same, my bf thinks I'm such a weirdo when I just stop and say
I hear something
he's like what
and I just know it's some awful flappy lil insect :vroam:

My first exam is on the 11th :hide:

started revision today :colondollar:

but tbf we haven't finished the content yet :ninja:

quizlet is so great :five:

hope you're having a great evening, loving the blog, just caught up with the posts I missed :woo:

Reply 90

DrawTheLine

Original post by CheeseIsVeg

omg I am exactly the same, my bf thinks I'm such a weirdo when I just stop and say
I hear something
he's like what
and I just know it's some awful flappy lil insect :vroam:

My first exam is on the 11th :hide:

started revision today :colondollar:

but tbf we haven't finished the content yet :ninja:

quizlet is so great :five:

hope you're having a great evening, loving the blog, just caught up with the posts I missed :woo:

My boyfriend loves spiders and little bugs and is always joking with me that he will put one on me :eek3:

Yeah good evening so far. I feel healthy for having a pear :grin:

glad you're enjoying it and amazed you're managing to read all of them, they're like essays :shock:

Reply 91

CheeseIsVeg

Original post by DrawTheLine

My boyfriend loves spiders and little bugs and is always joking with me that he will put one on me :eek3:

Yeah good evening so far. I feel healthy for having a pear :grin:

glad you're enjoying it and amazed you're managing to read all of them, they're like essays :shock:

Run away

Very nice! I just had a banana myself :mmm:

But no, essays are boring :wink2:

Reply 92

DrawTheLine

1st May 2018

Nope, this isn't fair. :mad:

I didn't agree to May coming around so quickly. :noway:

Take me back to February where life was peachy and not stressful please. :please:

My exam is in a frightening amount of time and I don't appreciate these feelings it is giving me. :nooo:

I've been so productive today :yeah:

, although around 3pm I started burning out. :burnout:

I woke up at 7am again, out of bed and dressed at 7:30. I had tea (best way to start your day :tea:

) and watched an episode of Suits (my boyfriend paid Netflix again - yay :dance:

) so now I can relax knowing what happened. I started working at 8:30 for about 45 minutes but then my stomach would not let me focus any more. I paused work to have some cereal and then carried on again. One thing I love about the relationship I have with my boyfriend is whenever we call for hours, we aren't talking all the time. Like today were were on a call about 5 hours, we hardly spoke for any of that. I was revising, he was playing his Xbox. It's nice, because it makes us feel close like a normal couple would be. :love:

I had one headphone in playing my music so I could concentrate. Did you know that Cotton Eye Joe makes revising really intense? :nutcase:

Yeah, figured that one out today.

At around 11:30, I started getting hungry again but this was way too early for lunch. Cereal never keeps me full longer than 2 or 3 hours, no matter how big of a bowl I have. :no:

So I thought I would have some of those grapes I bought the other day. Nope, fluffy white mould growing on them. :yucky:

They weren't supposed to go off until the 3rd but I inspected them and several of them either had those little clouds on them or had little white specks of them forming. I ate 2 "clean" grapes but it put me off the rest of them, so they were binned. :sad:

That upset me because they were supposed to be good for at least another 2 days. So instead I had a small handful of almonds. I could easily it the rest of the bag, but I thought that may be too much and I want to make them last. I got on with some more work. having more tea. Tea can make me feel less hungry too, which is a bonus. :yy:

Finally at 1pm my stomach was yelling at me so I made a sweet chili chicken wrap using the final chicken breast I had leftover. I made it with spinach and red pepper. My wrapping technique is still awful but only 2 spinach leaves fell out this time, so I class that as a win. :w00t:

It was a very nice lunch and very filling. I've actually only just realised while writing this that I haven't eaten anything since lunch. Go me! :woo:

Normally that's rare for me not to snack in between lunch and dinner. After I had my lunch I got back to revising, but I noticed my brain power was lagging. I gave up at around 3:30. :sigh:

Not only was my hand hurting, but my head was and my brain was feeling clouded. :ashamed:

Like I had just read the dictionary in one sitting. Not nice. I hope I can get a teensy bit more work done tonight, however I think it would be best to rest for tonight and then tomorrow morning be more productive before the big essays need to be written. I know, I think I'll just look over some exam questions and plan some answers. That's pretty relaxed, I can manage that. :awesome:

My dinner is currently in the oven - a macaroni pasta bake. It's my mum's recipe and I'm just assuming it's Finnish. :dontknow:

It's macaroni with beef mince, onions and spices all mixed together. Baked in the oven for an hour with some grated cheese on top for those crispy feels. :drool:

It is a mouthgasm I can tell you now. Seriously fantastic. :thumbsup:

I asked for the recipe over a week ago but have only just gotten round to making it now. I really hope it is just as good as how my mum makes it, because I am craving her home cooking. Well, I suppose one good thing about it being May is I get to see my mummah at the end of it and have her make me food. :heart:

She's previously said it makes her feel like she is still needed when she makes me and my brother food, which breaks my heart a bit. :cry2:

She's needed all the time, even if it doesn't seem like it because I'm at uni and my brother has a job. Every now and then I will text her a cooking question like if it is okay to do this with a certain vegetable or something. I think she likes that. :hugs:

3rd day without chocolate! Woop. :proud:

I texted my mum that and she asked if I was ill. :lol:

I will break this streak though tomorrow with my hot chocolate and chocolate muffin from Costa. I'm feeling proud of myself for eating healthily for 3 days. :yep:

I know it's not super clean eating healthy diet stuff with kale, but for me it's impressive. Especially with the reduction in snacks, and swapping them for healthy snacks.

The rest of the evening will probably just be relaxing. I'm excited for the Bake Off Professionals to air, I love any Bake Off I can get. :excited:

I recently discovered a baking blog called Jane's Patisserie which has some amazing recipes, most of which I want to bake in the summer. I'm super excited for that and I really want to do it now but I have to resist the temptation to buy ingredients. My student loan can go on better things! :erm:

Food diary!

Breakfast: bowl of fruit and fibre cereal
Lunch: 2 sweet chili chicken wraps with spinach and red pepper
Dinner: macaroni bake
Snacks: almonds and I'll have a pear after dinner too

Spoiler

Reply 93

DrawTheLine

That bake was amazing and tasted almost exactly like my mum's cooking :biggrin:

Reply 94

DrawTheLine

Now I'm craving something sweet like an ice cream. One of those stawberry cornettos or a Magnum. :drool:

Interesting it took me 3 days to want something sweet like this :hmmmm:

Reply 95

04MR17

Volunteer Section Leader

Original post by DrawTheLine

Now I'm craving something sweet like an ice cream. One of those stawberry cornettos or a Magnum. :drool:

Interesting it took me 3 days to want something sweet like this :hmmmm:

Excellent choice with the cornettos. :yep:

Reply 96

DrawTheLine

Original post by 04MR17

Excellent choice with the cornettos. :yep:

I haven't had one in years so it's a rather strange craving, but a very nice one :daydreaming:

Reply 97

DrawTheLine

Well that macaroni bake has given me 4 portions of leftovers. I still have one more portion of butter chicken curry so it's safe to say I don't have to cook for the rest of the week :tongue:

Reply 98

DrawTheLine

I've got a sudden burst of confidence for this exam tomorrow. :awesome:

I just planned 2 essays totally from memory in under 5 minutes each. I CAN DO THIS! :yeah:

I also glanced at some others and immediately had ideas as to what I could say. I really hope I feel this way in the exam tomorrow. Feeling like this has made me believe that all of my revision will pay off and that I know more than I think I know. :yep:

I really hope I am right and my post tomorrow will be beaming about how good the exam went. :crossedf:

Reply 99

DrawTheLine

2nd May 2018

So today started off medium, went good, and then crashed right back down. :frown:

Ffs I'm angry and sad and overwhelmed and stressed right now. :argh:

I'll start from the beginning of my day.

I woke up feeling refreshed. :awesome:

I went to bed about 30 minutes earlier last night to prepare for my exam. I woke up at 7, feeling good and ready. I got dressed, had tea and watched some Suits while chatting to my boyfriend. Life is good, right? :bigsmile:

I started doing revision at 8:30 (go me :cute:

) until about 9:15 when I got really hungry and stopped for some cereal. After food I got back to revision and I worked really hard until just before 12, when I had to stop because my hand was killing me and I had to have my lunch before I had to leave for my exam. Everything was going well. I wasn't actually that hungry at lunch so I had to force it down a little bit. :dry:

My exam actually was decent, I think (I hope) I got a 2:1. I need that at a minimum really. I wrote 7 sides of A4 all about psychopaths, I was totally in my element. :thumbsup:

My other question answer was only okay. I think I waffled a bit but I hope I made it link back to the question enough. I came out happy and texted both of my parents. My mum replied saying well done, no reply from my dad. He was at work so understandable there was no reply. :indiff:

I hopped on the bus after straight to town to check the rota for next week at work, it wasn't up. :unimpressed:

One of my colleagues said it'll be up later today or tomorrow, so I thought I would check back tomorrow. I should have next week off as a holiday but I want to know it for suresies. :crossedf:

I then went to Costa to get my well done hot chocolate and muffin, very yummy they were. :yum:

When I got back home, I watched Suits and played around on my phone. Then it all went t*ts up, pear shaped and any other phrase for f*cked. :unsure:

My phone just went black, and totally died. :zomg:

It had just finished charging to 100%. Nope, not turning back on. F*ck I was thinking, if my phone is screwed this is the only way I talk to my family. My dad would have wanted to ring me tonight to talk about my exam. So I rushed around, putting my shoes and coat on to head to town again to the Samsung store and hope they can fix it. :vroam:

I first went to Carphone Warehouse as it was the first one I got to. I asked them and they were like we can send it off for repair, it will take a month, or you can upgrade early and it'll cost you £60. :yikes:

The repair one was not an option as I will be at home in a month, and the upgrade one, I'd rather not spend that much if it can be fixed.

So I went to the Samsung store. The woman took my phone somewhere and ran some tests, came back with it turned on saying the phone is fine and it most likely just crashed because it needed a break. I was so relieved (at this point getting worried about my dad so I was tearing up a bit). :h:

I walked out the store and about 100m away it froze. 7 times, before dying again. :nooo:

The battery was already down to 70% at this point. So I turned around straight back to the store like help me. :please:

This time super close to bawling like a baby losing a lollipop. She said in that case we can put it in for repair and it'll be ready tomorrow or Friday. I thought okay, do it because I need to be able to call my parents. It's free too because I'm still within the warranty as I have only had it a year and a half. I was properly crying at this point. :cry2:

Honestly the main reason is I know my dad will be worrying something has happened to me if my phone is off and he can't get a hold of me. He doesn't have Facebook or anything, so the only way I can directly contact him is through call or text. I'm worried that he is going to be worrying I've been murdered or something. :cry:

I have a reference number to put into the website tomorrow to check when it is ready to pick up. It sucks because I had made plans with friends to meet up tomorrow and get lunch and be social, but I've told them I have to cancel because I don't have a phone. :erm:

If I leave to meet them and then suddenly they can't make it or plans change I won't have any way of knowing. :dontknow:

Also, I need to be at home with my laptop to check if it is ready or not as I want it back as soon as possible.

They also said my data will be wiped etc. I recently backed up the important photos so that's okay, but there's some ones I took recently that will be gone. That sucks because I took some great ones of my and my cat. :argh:

It sounds like a non-thing to be upset about but it really upsets me that I'll be losing them. I hope they're on my SD card but I really don't know if they are because I don't know how my phone stores things, if it is only on my phone or automatically on the card. So that'll be interesting to see when I get my phone back. :hmmmm:

As soon as I got home I emailed my parents to tell them I don't have a phone. :cyber:

But I have no idea if and when my parents check their emails, so my dad could be worrying about me this whole time. It's very stressful. I was feeling so good about today after my exam and it's all gone wrong. :cry2:

I know it may seem like nothing because it is just a phone, but it would be like that if I was at home with my family. But my phone is the only way to get in touch with my family immediately, therefore it's very important. Email isn't direct or instant unlike a text or phone call. My dad does worry I'll be kidnapped or raped or murdered a lot, so not being able to get a hold of me will be concerning for him. :dong:

I'm typing this all now and then it'll probably turn out that he totally forgot I had my exam today. :colonhash:

It also restricts how I can contact my boyfriend. I need to be on my laptop in order to call him, whereas before I could be laying in bed calling him. It makes me feel uneasy that people might worry about me. Also, my boss. If she needs to contact me urgently she won't be able to at first unless she tries Facebook, which she hasn't done before, it's always been Whatsapp or text. Argh I'm driving myself insane. :crazy:

So I need to keep myself occupied until I get my phone back, and I hope it is all okay and they can fix it. I feel like a total WIMP for crying in the store. :cry:

Seriously, I need to grow a f*cking pair and close my tear ducts. I tried not to cry, I did, but I honestly just can't help it. :nope:

When I worry and get worked up I just cry. It makes me feel so down because I know I am seen as weak for crying. :no:

I just need to destress myself for the rest of the evening and try not to think of it. I am feeling very sweary right now. :sigh:

Whenever I feel angry or distressed like this I like to just roll off all the swearing until it's out of my system. Have you ever seen The Heat, where Sandra Bullock goes into the meeting room and swears at all her colleagues for laughing at Melissa McCarthy? She's like "you sh*t f*ck d*ck f*ckers". That's what I do. I just swear for a minute in total meaningless sentences and then it feels a bit better again. :argh:

I haven't even eaten any dinner because this has stressed me out. :afraid:

I'm not hungry in the slightest. :noway:

I should eat something but I have no appetite. That curry really needs eating. Maybe I'll have it later, who knows. I probably won't sleep early tonight because I'm so worked up.

Edit: almost as I'm ready to post I'm feeling a bit hungry. So I'll heat up the curry and eat what I feel like eating.

Food diary!

Breakfast: bowl of fruit and fibre cereal
Lunch: leftover macaroni bake
Dinner: leftover curry
Snacks: chocolate muffin, a few almonds

Spoiler

(edited 5 years ago)