Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

Convincing parents to get piercings

basically i really want to get some more piercings but idk how to convince my parents

recently every year on my birthday i’ve gotten piercings and my dad doesn’t want me to get anymore because he thinks that it affects the way people will see me which makes me want to get them even more to prove that having piercings/tattoos doesn’t change who you are and your abilities

i understand that for my age, 16, i’ve already got more than average but piercings aren’t permanent and can easily be taken out so please don’t hate

this year i got some piercings without asking them and they didn’t get too pissed so do u think they would let me get others if i asked in the hope that i won’t go get them myself again if they say no??

Reply 1

fallen_acorns

the approach to take with your dad - if you want him to understand, is to start your argument from his core point of view.

So - he thinks that people will think worse of you when they see your piercings.

If you try and say to him 'no they wont' - he will just think 'shes wrong, she doesn't know, shes too young' etc.

A much much more effective argument would be:

'yes, I know some people will think differently of me when I get piercings, but that's what I want. I want people to see me for who I am, and if they don't like it, then I don't need them. I am my own person, and I can make my own decisions and mistakes'

I am not saying that he will agree and like your piercings, but that's a response that men will respect, even if they don't like. It does not deny the problem, or pretend that people won't look at you differently (some will) - instead it takes responsibility, it takes ownership of your decisions, and it shows real strength. Adults respect that much more then just trying to argue.

Reply 2

howitoughttobe

Original post by Nova.rose

As a 15 year old with 7 piercings in total, I thought my parents would not let me have any of them done but I guess I was wrong. The way I persuaded my mum to get my nose done was by telling her 'It's not going to affect my grades and I'm not going to suddenly turn into a Rebel'. Honestly (no offence), your dad saying that it might affect how you're viewed in public is absolutely ridiculous. He's contributing to that instant discrimination of how someone looks, which really needs to stop. I'd say, just sit down and talk to him about how it won't affect, like you said, your personality and abilities.
Good luck!
(Also, out of interest, how many piercings do you have and what do you want to get done?!)

Piercings can definitely affect people's view of you, especially when it comes to trying to get a job. Welcome to the real world hun, it's not how you think it is at 15.

Reply 3

howitoughttobe

Original post by Nova.rose

I never said that piercings don't affect people's view on you. What I specifically said is that it SHOULDN'T be that way. I understand that if you work in a very formal workplace, piercings aren't allowed as they aren't seen as professional. I also said that piercing's don't affect your personality and abilities. So next time hun, if you don't have anything to contribute or any advice to give on the original subject, I suggest you refrain from writing.

Actually the exact quote was "your dad saying that it might affect how you're viewed in public is absolutely ridiculous". It's not ridiculous it's true and a very good point. And it's not just formal workplaces, a LOT of workplaces don't allow them. So next time hun, I suggest you actually read what you wrote before you try and act so clever.

Reply 4

LadyEcliptic

People shouldn’t judge your ability by hair/piercings/tattoos but sadly they do.
Your dad has a point - where exactly do you want to get piercings? Ears are usually an okay thing but any other facial piercing tends to draw judgement. I have snake bites and other hidden piercings. I usually take them out before interviews and all. Even though it says in many companies that they can not discriminate based on looks, I still wouldn’t risk it cause some people are funny.
Maybe wait a month or so and if you feel you still want it then tell your parents.

Piercings are hard upkeep as well, more effort than it’s worth tbh.

Reply 5

bones-mccoy

Everyone judges, it's human nature. When you get multiple piercings you have to come to terms with the fact that some people will treat you differently and some places won't hire people with those piercings. It's all part of the package. I think because you're so young a lot of people will see your piercings and think it's just a passing fad, although it does of course depend on which piercing and where.

Reply 6

AndrewBlue

I don't think you should. If you're in a fight, it will cause immense pain, bleeding and trouble. Especially when you fight a notorious fighter like McGrego, or his Irish cousin.

Reply 7

AndrewBlue

Original post by bones-mccoy

although it does of course depend on which piercing and where.

Absolutely, most people are Entirely IGNORANT of pierced genitalia. But if you have it in your nose then it's all bad black magick bad...something about noses makes them think it's a holy relic that belongs in a museum. But not the other member.

Reply 8

cloudc

So I've had my ears pierced since I as 10 months old, and then when I was 14 I wanted to get my cartilage pierced. Obviously at this point I was still in school and my school was very strict about piercings so you were only allowed one in each ear. When telling my parents I was going to get it done they kind of left it down to me. So if the school saw it and I got in trouble they weren't going to help and if it got infected they weren't going to have any sympathy.
When I started college in Sept 2016 I started thinking that I wanted to get my nose pierced, and one morning on my way to college int eh car with my mum I was just like yeah I'm gonna get it done. She was against the idea but kind of knew i was going to get it done anyway no matter what she said, all she asked was where i was getting it done and whether id told my dad or not. Now I'd definitely say that my dad is the scarier parent out the two but now that I'm nearly 18 his vibe is do what you like to an extent. So now 1.5 years later I still have my nose piercing.
I think its all about having an element of trust with your parents, and them knowing that you know the consequences of getting something like this done.
With what you were saying about it shouldn't alter how people perceive you, I completely agree and I'm sure the rest of our generation do as well; however I know that when I go for a job interview in the future I will more than likely take out my nose piercing, because I personally don't want anyone to have any preconceptions about the type of person I am. I will also follow this as I want to get tattoos in the future and they will be done in places which can be covered up.

So yeah get into the position with your parents that you're getting to the age where you can make your own decisions and if something goes wrong you can figure it out yourself x