I hate my life

I’m 18 and I’m so depressed about my life. Ive been in and out of mental institutions as I can’t cope with normal life. I have no friends and the only family I have is my mother and sister. My sister lives far away and my mother works nights so I hardly see her. I feel so different from my peers, I’m not original ly from England and I never feel like I can fit in for the years I’ve been here. I can’t get into any friendship groups, and I can’t seem to find any guys who like me without wanting to have sex with me. I practically talk to no one and live a sad existence. I haven’t been happy in a long time and I think people can tell which discourages them to stay away from me. No matter how many holidays or self pampering sessions, etc I can’t seem to be happy

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Reply 1

the_queen

It seems it is about severe depression. Maybe a visit to your gp or a psychologist will help you.

Pm me

Original post by Anonymous

awwwwww I feel for you, felt that way myself around start of being 17 but luckily managed to deal with it.

Reply 4

Decipher

If you do find it hard to find people to speak to and make friends with, you can talk to awesome people on TSR ^ ^ I'm sure someone here would like to be your friend. Just know you're never alone :biggrin:

Reply 5

Decipher

Also i'm presuming ur doing A levels?? if so understandably the stress and Uni application etc..... is tough to deal with. You just need to ride through it ^ ^

Reply 6

London090

Original post by temzra

Pm me

You can PM me as well❤️

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by Decipher

Thank you for your reply, I don’t find it hard I just don’t have the enthusiasm and the will to want to talk to someone :frown:

but I would like to make some friends

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by Decipher

awwwwww I feel for you, felt that way myself around start of being 17 but luckily managed to deal with it.

How did you deal with it?

Reply 9

as125

Insert [pm me comment]

Reply 10

Analyst89

I think you should visit a GP who may refer you to a therapist.

If you feel the need to talk, feel free to PM me :smile:

Reply 11

roseprincessx

Original post by Anonymous

PM me girl xx

Reply 12

LJE18

Original post by Anonymous

If you take nothing else form this,just rmeber you are an amazing human being. I read that being depressed is a stage of your life, you don't like how it is bow but if things changed completely you night be happier
There may not be much merit to this but I think it's important to remember that things will improve.

Reply 13

Decipher

Original post by Anonymous

How did you deal with it?

I was just depressed because of the things that happened around me, moved colleges, friends stayed at old college, relationship issues and general stress from exams during A levels.
Making new friends was probably the hardest thing since everyone already had their social groups and i felt like i was third wheeling at times especially since i was kinda an introvert. Luckily managed to sit next to a couple of people who happened to have the same interests as me and after hanging out with them one thing led to another and I'm still friends with them, they were a bunch of extrovert's and managed to absorb me into their group :biggrin:

There isn't much you can do to deal with Exam stress apart form being calm and doing exercise and meet people at gyms or play a game or procrastinate like me and read through TSR and watch youtube vids every now and then. Just take some time to do stuff you genuinely enjoy to lighten your mood and get the blood pumping.

As for a relationship your only 18 so don't worry about that atm, focus on your studies. Since I moved colleges my gf stayed in my old one so i couldn't see her from a day to day basis which was a bummer but I still manage to facetime or see her (just isn't convenient with all the travelling).

But it was the first 5-6 months of AS (A level) which i felt pretty damn depressed but after I made some friends after switching to different classes and courses since i was unsure at the time, but i managed to get myself out of that miserable pit luckily. I'm sure this is only temporary and seeming as your not from england it can be difficult, you're in a tougher spot than i was in but hopefully you'll find the ideal guy and some friends who make you happy and you'll become a happy individual. It's just school can sometimes be a kick in the balls at times and stressful.

(edited 5 years ago)

Reply 14

LuminousRain

Original post by Anonymous

First of all, well done for opening up!

Try to actively arrange more time to see your mother. Naturally, this means you're going to want to optimise your time management skills. Also, you can call her as well, same for your sister. Calling is good.

If you can't seem to get into friendship groups, I recommend going to lots of places where people are there. You can literally make friends anywhere. I recommend doing some volunteering, part-time job, university/college can help, going to events e.g. comic conventions, cafes, music concerts etc. When at these places, make sure you're approachable and be the one to go and talk to some people - don't wait for them to come to you - go to them, that's more charismatic usually anyway.

About sex, I assume you mean you only find guys, where if they like you, they happen to only want sex. First of all, you say that you 'practically talk to no one' so you clearly aren't meeting that many guys; you've unfortunately happened to have found the bad fish - the above steps will help mitigate that - broaden your horizons. Secondly, guys naturally are inclined to want sex, but how can you say the people you meet only want it? You've only met an extremely small amount of guys, so your perception of them and expectations will now be skewed.

The goal shouldn't really be to 'be happy', in my opinion. I think instead you should look for things that will create meaning. What's your big dream; is there a problem in the world you care passionately about? Is there something you would like to contribute to the world? The problem with being happy is that it suggests you ought to never be sad. This is problematic as life really is like a web of roller-coasters - many parts of your life will have their ups and downs. So, for example, you may be better at self-reflecting as you may have spent more time alone than other people. Make your negatives positives: though you have little friends, that's a great opportunity to make more!

So, to summarise, re-frame your mindset, make time for your family (if there was a flood, you would make time for that. It's all about priority), start actively seeking people to build deeper bonds and really put that effort in, and find that dream you have that will fricken wake you up at 5am/6am in the morning.

Follow your heart, take massive action, and go live the life you were born to live.
All the best!

(edited 5 years ago)

Reply 15

Decipher

Original post by LuminousRain

First of all, well done for opening up!

Try to actively arrange more time to see your mother. Naturally, this means you're going to want to optimise your time management skills. Also, you can call her as well, same for your sister. Calling is good.

If you can't seem to get into friendship groups, I recommend going to lots of places where people are there. You can literally make friends anywhere. I recommend doing some volunteering, part-time job, university/college can help, going to events e.g. comic conventions, cafes etc. When at these places, make sure you're approachable and be the one to go and talk to some people - don't wait for them to come to you - go to them, that's more charismatic usually anyway.

About sex, I assume you mean you only find guys, where if they like you, they happen to only want sex. First of all, you say that you 'practically talk to no one' so you clearly aren't meeting that many guys; you've unfortunately happened to have found the bad fish - the above steps will help mitigate that - broaden your horizons. Secondly, guys naturally are inclined to want sex, but how can you say the people you meet only want it? You've only met an extremely small amount of guys, so your perception of them and expectations will now be skewed.

The goal shouldn't really be to 'be happy', in my opinion. I think instead you should look for things that will create meaning. What's your big dream; is there a problem in the world you care passionately about? Is there something you would like to contribute to the world? The problem with being happy is that it suggests you ought to never be sad. This is problematic as life really is like a web of roller-coasters - many parts of your life will have their ups and downs. So, for example, you may be better at self-reflecting as you may have spent more time alone than other people. Make your negatives positives: though you have little friends, that's a great opportunity to make more!

So, to summarise, re-frame your mindset, start actively seeking people to build deeper bonds and really put that effort in, and find that dream you have that will fricken wake you up at 5am/6am in the morning.

All the best!

Is that Rintarou Okabe? :biggrin:

Reply 16

LuminousRain

Original post by Decipher

Is that Rintarou Okabe? :biggrin:

No.

I AM THE MAD SCIENTIST, HOUOUIN KYOUMA!!!

I WILL BRING CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION TO THE WORLD AND RESET ITS POWER STRUCTURE!

Hahah...HUAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Reply 17

Decipher

Original post by luminousrain

no.

I am the mad scientist, hououin kyouma!!!

I will bring chaos and destruction to the world and reset its power structure!

Hahah...huaaahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

yesssssss!!!!!

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

Original post by the_queen

It seems it is about severe depression. Maybe a visit to your gp or a psychologist will help you.