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Staying away from home with friends at 17?

I'm a 17 year old girl with 3 really close male friends, ages 17, 18 and 18.
Me and my 3 friends would like to go to a convention a few towns away from where we live for 3 days, and my friends suggested that to make things easier than travelling to the town every day by train that we should get a hotel together and stay in the town.
However, I have a really strict mum that has very rarely in the past let me do things that my friend's parents wouldn't even question them doing, and when I tried to suggest the idea of staying at a hotel with them she said no straight away.
It's not as if I'm a bad teenager, I've never done anything illegal and I'm always very careful, but it seems like my mum just doesn't trust me or acknowledge the fact I'm old enough to make sensible decisions on my own.

How do I get my mum to trust me a bit more as a 17 year old? Because sometimes I feel like I'm still being treated as though I am 13.

Thanks.
Original post by Otaku_Luna
I'm a 17 year old girl with 3 really close male friends, ages 17, 18 and 18.
Me and my 3 friends would like to go to a convention a few towns away from where we live for 3 days, and my friends suggested that to make things easier than travelling to the town every day by train that we should get a hotel together and stay in the town.
However, I have a really strict mum that has very rarely in the past let me do things that my friend's parents wouldn't even question them doing, and when I tried to suggest the idea of staying at a hotel with them she said no straight away.
It's not as if I'm a bad teenager, I've never done anything illegal and I'm always very careful, but it seems like my mum just doesn't trust me or acknowledge the fact I'm old enough to make sensible decisions on my own.

How do I get my mum to trust me a bit more as a 17 year old? Because sometimes I feel like I'm still being treated as though I am 13.

Thanks.


This is a disaster waiting to happen. Sorry but one girl + 3 guys. Nope. Ain’t gonna work hun. Your mum isn’t gonna budge regardless how much you try.
Reply 2
Original post by ProRoadman
This is a disaster waiting to happen. Sorry but one girl + 3 guys. Nope. Ain’t gonna work hun. Your mum isn’t gonna budge regardless how much you try.


The problem isn't that they are guys, she's told me she understands that I don't have many female friends, but it's more the fact that I would be staying away from home on my own.
Original post by Otaku_Luna
The problem isn't that they are guys, she's told me she understands that I don't have many female friends, but it's more the fact that I would be staying away from home on my own.


I mean...you can and should have a proper conversation with her about the fact that you think she’s treating you like you’re 13, but that’s about it and I wouldn’t expect her to change her mind
You could point out that you could move out at any time if you wished, can't expect someone to stay under the thumb forever.
Reply 5
When I read 1 girl and 3 guys instantly one image came to mind 😅😂
Original post by Otaku_Luna
I'm a 17 year old girl with 3 really close male friends, ages 17, 18 and 18.
Me and my 3 friends would like to go to a convention a few towns away from where we live for 3 days, and my friends suggested that to make things easier than travelling to the town every day by train that we should get a hotel together and stay in the town.
However, I have a really strict mum that has very rarely in the past let me do things that my friend's parents wouldn't even question them doing, and when I tried to suggest the idea of staying at a hotel with them she said no straight away.
It's not as if I'm a bad teenager, I've never done anything illegal and I'm always very careful, but it seems like my mum just doesn't trust me or acknowledge the fact I'm old enough to make sensible decisions on my own.

How do I get my mum to trust me a bit more as a 17 year old? Because sometimes I feel like I'm still being treated as though I am 13.

Thanks.


Talk to her about what she's worried about and try to help reduce her concerns. She's just looking out for your safety. Plus for a lot of parents acknowledging that their child is no longer a helpless baby can take a while.

Tell her you'll text her or call her every day so she knows you're safe. Has she met your friends before? If so then tell her she can trust them. If she hasn't met them, invite them over for dinner or some tea and biscuits so she can feel more at ease. Tell her your plans for the few days so she is reassured you won't be in danger.
Reply 7
Original post by DrawTheLine
Talk to her about what she's worried about and try to help reduce her concerns. She's just looking out for your safety. Plus for a lot of parents acknowledging that their child is no longer a helpless baby can take a while.

Tell her you'll text her or call her every day so she knows you're safe. Has she met your friends before? If so then tell her she can trust them. If she hasn't met them, invite them over for dinner or some tea and biscuits so she can feel more at ease. Tell her your plans for the few days so she is reassured you won't be in danger.


Thank you, I planned on having her meet my friends, and even the other 17 year old's parent who has already agreed to drive us to the convention to try and ease her worries.
Original post by Otaku_Luna
Thank you, I planned on having her meet my friends, and even the other 17 year old's parent who has already agreed to drive us to the convention to try and ease her worries.


That sounds good. Parent to parent talks may help her feel better. Good luck!
Reply 9
Original post by StriderHort
You could point out that you could move out at any time if you wished, can't expect someone to stay under the thumb forever.


Her response to that is that while I live with her I have to play by her rules, even if I think they are unfair.
1.) Try reasoning with her through normal convo.

2..) If she still says no then play up a bit, start shouting, whining, get angry. you need to show her that being treated like a baby at 17 pisses you off.

3.) If that still doesn't work, then you gotta go anyway, book the tickets and go. I know it's scary but you've got to rebel in order to show them they can't control you forever. they may be mad at you but it will be temporary and plus what they gonna do? certainly not kick you out, they see you as a child. parents expect their child to rebel to a certain degree.

I'm so glad i had parents who trusted me throughout my youth. Can't imagine how irritating living with strict parents would be.

Good luck
Don't be a pushover grow some lady balls!
Your mum will still love you even if you're disobedient dw

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