Last summer dad dragged me (19 at the time, 20 now) and my 2 younger siblings (sister - 16 turning 17 in a couple days and brother - 12 years old) on a holiday in Devon. We all hated it, and we did our best to hide that we hated it, but he could tell. Mainly because we'd done the exact same thing every year since we were born (and dad has done it for longer than that). He's not a great dad, tbh. He yells a lot and he always clashes with my sister. They're too similar. They can't spend a day together without a fight, let alone a week. When I go on holiday with them I involuntary become a buffer between them. And when I say buffer I don't mean that I can diffuse arguments, but when I'm there they both choose to mock/insult me rather than pick at each other. They call me stupid, make fun of my appearance, and mock me because me and my boyfriend are long distance (they joke that he isn't real) when the reality is that we see each other all the time - I just don't want him to meet them.
I'm sick of it. It's not healthy for anyone involved. I don't want to be stuck in the middle of the two of them for another week.
However, I feel guilty. If it weren't for my brother, I wouldn't hesitate to bail. But my brother was there for mum and dad's divorce, he listened to all the fighting, same as me and her, and he doesn't do too well with arguments. Neither do I, tbh, but I'm an adult and I can handle it better than he can. But I already go with them every other weekend to see dad and every single time I get both him and my sister attacking me from both sides about literally everything.
I'm 20 now. I think I could maybe get out of the summer holiday this year. My questions are: 1) is it justifiable to leave the 12 and 17 year old to deal with dad and 2) how could I get out of it? Dad won't accept that I just don't want to go. I'd need an excuse I could start setting up now and give him in the next couple months before he makes any plans.