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I don't trust my boyfriend

We were dating for 2 months until one day he ghosted me, and stopped answering my texts and calls. I didn't chase him and simply moved on despite being disappointed. A month later, he texts asking how I am. I asked him where he went, he profusely apologised and told me he had personal family issues and couldn't deal with a relationship.

I was annoyed but we became friends after a bit, and went out for dinner yesterday to 'catch up' - he paid so not sure if it was a date? We have another next week. I can't help but wonder if he left me for another woman and when it didn't work out, he went running back to his ex (me) but he'll say never that. I don't trust him but I don't show it. I can't help but wonder if he's texting or going out on dates with multiple women. What do I do?
No reason to assume he did because some people just suck at keeping up relationships and bad lies are how they deal with it.

But equally, he doesn't really sound like someone who deserves your trust without earning it.

Only way you'll relax is by talking to him.
Reply 2
Original post by HoldThisL
No reason to assume he did because some people just suck at keeping up relationships and bad lies are how they deal with it.

But equally, he doesn't really sound like someone who deserves your trust without earning it.

Only way you'll relax is by talking to him.


It just doesn't feel the same as before. I mean he's still him and our chemistry is still there, but now I feel like I'm just waiting for him to ghost again. Or I feel like he's just with me whilst he's on the lookout for the next girl for when he gets bored with me. Even if I did talk to him and he tells me it's not the case, it's pointless because even if he does have bad intentions, he's wouldn't outright say it, he'll just let me find out the hard way.
Reply 3
Whatever the reason for it he didn’t care about you enough to talk to you about it. Doesn’t sound worth your time.
ask him straight up. like, he was your boyfriend and without splitting with you he just disappeared... if he had family issues he could have atleast messaged you and told you before he cut you off. He's so so sorry because he knows he was in the wrong and believes your a forgiving woman. idk man, that just seems dogdyy
Confused boys should be left alone. After he disappeared for a month, you should have just kept it going with your life. Not worth the hassle
Reply 6
Original post by anon123a
ask him straight up. like, he was your boyfriend and without splitting with you he just disappeared... if he had family issues he could have atleast messaged you and told you before he cut you off. He's so so sorry because he knows he was in the wrong and believes your a forgiving woman. idk man, that just seems dogdyy


I've already asked but I feel it's just pointless asking for any more clarification, as lets say he really did leave me for someone else, he'll never admit that. Plus, I feel like by taking him back so to speak, I've become his safe option. When we went out after not seeing each other in weeks, all my old feelings came back, I just had to suppress them and I'm not allowing myself to fall in too deep in case he just ups and leaves again. That's not what a relationship should be like. To earn my trust back somewhat, he'll have to stick around and be consistent for at least 2 months or something to undo some of the damage he's done.
Reply 7
Original post by The Uniqueness
Confused boys should be left alone. After he disappeared for a month, you should have just kept it going with your life. Not worth the hassle


yeah maybe you're right. I mean what's a relationship without trust at the end of the day?
Reply 8
he did it once he will do it again....
In my experience, people rarely ever change. If he was using you as a comfort zone to retract to, chances are that he will do it again when someone else comes along that he may be interested in. Be strong and get yourself out of that habit of being just a person that he can always come back to if other relations mess up. You are worth more and time would be better spent being cherished by someone else who is deserving.
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
We were dating for 2 months until one day he ghosted me, and stopped answering my texts and calls. I didn't chase him and simply moved on despite being disappointed. A month later, he texts asking how I am. I asked him where he went, he profusely apologised and told me he had personal family issues and couldn't deal with a relationship.

I was annoyed but we became friends after a bit, and went out for dinner yesterday to 'catch up' - he paid so not sure if it was a date? We have another next week. I can't help but wonder if he left me for another woman and when it didn't work out, he went running back to his ex (me) but he'll say never that. I don't trust him but I don't show it. I can't help but wonder if he's texting or going out on dates with multiple women. What do I do?


Remember he ghosted you. Gave no explanation . Reappeared later at his convenience. And you entertained his excuses and disrespect. Maybe you are right; his relationships or girlfriends are not available or didn't work or he's cheating so he has come back to see what he can get from you. He is using you. You should not be allowing it. Dump him and find someone with a more mature respectful attitude. You must refuse to be his sloppy seconds.

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