Can Boys and Girls be JUST friends?

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Reply 40

Scottishflavour

Do the guys fancy you tho?

Original post by ohdahnnyboi

i have guy friends who i would never date and vice versa - just yek, no (no offense, but ykwim)

see above :smile:

Reply 41

username2353215

Took the words right out of my mouth. Bet she never thought the other way round.

Original post by Scottishflavour

Do the guys fancy you tho?

C

Reply 42

username2353215

It is quite literally natural, I find it unbelievable how many people are so far past reality.

Might be I am too old, who knows. :biggrin:

Reply 43

ohdahnnyboi

Original post by Scottishflavour

Do the guys fancy you tho?

C

i said vice versa - means they wouldn't date me either, there is no attraction, we have such dead(or not) banter, and we've made it clear to each other there is nothing

Reply 44

ohdahnnyboi

that's what u think - go ahead :smile:

but btw, i did - does no one know what vice versa means?

Original post by TSRFT8

Took the words right out of my mouth. Bet she never thought the other way round.

Reply 45

Scottishflavour

Well that's different then

Original post by ohdahnnyboi

i said vice versa - means they wouldn't date me either, there is no attraction, we have such dead(or not) banter, and we've made it clear to each other there is nothing

Reply 46

username2427341

Yes they can be despite being a Muslim and saying this

Reply 47

username1539513

Of course, obviously, if one or both of the parties are gay

Original post by TSRFT8

An interesting debate I saw and one which is quite relevant in this day and age.

What is your HONEST opinion, can a boy and girl be just friends? What if one is single and the other is in a relationship, or both are in a relationship?

Reply 48

username2353215

Original post by *Alisha*

Yes they can be despite being a Muslim and saying this

That is really really interesting. The individual whose lecture (if you will) I watched was speaking from the Islamic perspective, as contact is strictly forbidden between non-mahrems (non family men??).

His opinion was very insightful - personally I cant see a male and female being strictly friends, yes maybe for a few months or even a year if they are both single it does make it slightly easier but when one is in a relationship I just think it is far-fetched.

If you dont mind me asking; how would you feel if your husband was messaging his girl best friend, or going out with her? In Islam it is strictly forbidden so I guess we are going beyond the simple social norms and into more strict boundaries which are made to protect the followers.

Reply 49

username2353215

This is the only situation where this would work. Anything else is just denial at its finest.

Yes

Original post by Scottishflavour

Well that's different then

not really? there was a guy i liked and i told him, and he rejected me, and we're just friends. others we just don't because we don't need to
it's not impossible
i'm not saying that there isn't the potential for something, but not always

Reply 52

username1539513

I’m not so sure, throughout most of my life the vast majority of my friends have been male and I’ve never been with any of them nor have they expressed attraction to me

Original post by TSRFT8

This is the only situation where this would work. Anything else is just denial at its finest.

Reply 53

username2427341

Original post by TSRFT8

Well if he loves me and I love him, there should be trust in our relationship. So I wouldn't mind if he was messaging a girl besides me or even going out with her, but I'd prefer him going out with his other friends and not just the girl alone lol

Reply 54

username2353215

I get what you are saying - however, usually this attraction is not expressed just due to the boundary of friendship, not because it is non-existent. I implore you to watch the social study, I will link it for you.

It explores how friends of different genders were asked if anything else COULD develop and 97% said yes, IF the option was made available, basically if the other crossed the boundary first then its fair game.

Reply 55

Obolinda

Volunteer Team

I don't know why being attracted to your friend means that you can't still say, friends. :dontknow:

I mean having a relationship doesn't mean your emotions just turn off for everybody else.

Reply 56

username2353215

Original post by *Alisha*

But you trust him? So following that logic, you would trust him in a room alone with this girl?

Trust is HUGELY confused now a days. It is seen as "controlling" if you do not allow your partner out alone with a male or female, co-incidentally so many relationships end because of cheating, so is it really controlling or prevention as opposed to cure.

Reply 57

username1539513

I would like to also add that most of my male friends have girlfriends, as do I. It is perfectly possible to hang out with the opposite gender in a purely platonic way

Original post by TSRFT8