The Student Room Group

Does nobody want to sponsor me or even care about me?

So for a long time I've wanted to be a boxer, it's something I've kept to myself for some time, it's something I dreamed about when I was unable to walk for two years and now I'm up and walking, running even and I've now finally decided to start my career in white collar.

It seems like a smart place to start things off as I'll get to see what it feels like to perform in front of an audience, if things don't go my way the loss won't count on any amateur record and I'll be raising money for cancer at the same time. Win, loss or draw I'll be joining an amateur boxing gym after it to compete in the amateur rankings, a white collar boxing match will showcase what skills I have and what I need to work on for the future.

So this morning I got the email stating I've been accepted and they'll begin training me on the 20th of May and my fight night is on the 13th July. Great. I instantly set up my JustGiving account, added a small bio and then posted to Facebook in hope that friends would support me... Well.

I understand that many people won't have the money to sponsor me but they haven't even liked or commented on it? I had to double check if I clicked 'share to myself only' which I didn't. :/ It's been five hours since I've posted it now and still nothing. I'm not one of those Facebookers that instantly gets tons of likes but I'll get about 20ish on my photos and statuses, However I've never had no response five hours later when posting a status or picture...

I've checked and close friends and family have been online and then offline again so that isn't the case. Usually they respond to my pictures or posts within an hour or two.

I know the day isn't out yet and that lots of the people I know will be at work but what am I to do or think if it goes past five PM and still nothing? I'm unsure if I'm being over dramatic... Most of you will probably comment saying wait until later on or tomorrow but I need advice now as I'm feeling quite annoyed.

Do you think I need new people in my life if the day blows out and there's still no comments or likes? Family that I live with have already told me that they don't support my choices in becoming a boxer which was a bit hurtful but now my post is being blanked by other people I know it's really got me down.
(edited 4 years ago)

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Reply 1
It won't definitely have been seen by everyone, even if they've been online... but anyway, stuff like that is often unsuccessful. There are so many people asking for donations on social media that a lot of people just ignore all of them, even if it's made very clear it's for charity (as, I assume, yours does). If someone asks me in person, or in a group, I'd probably help out - but I blank every single FB charity post that I see.

And people are discouraged from interacting with it. If they 'like' it, that tells you and anyone else who looks that they've seen it and chosen to not contribute. It's far better for their 'image' to pretend they haven't seen it. So I wouldn't view it as a reflection of your own popularity, rather as a reflection of what people are like.

But, I think that if people see others donating, they'll be far more likely to donate themselves. So maybe it just needs someone to start things off and you'll see more of a response. Perhaps ask some people
Reply 2
You're complaining because people aren't donating to you?

Oh god, the problems we have in this generation.
Original post by Neilos
It won't definitely have been seen by everyone, even if they've been online... but anyway, stuff like that is often unsuccessful. There are so many people asking for donations on social media that a lot of people just ignore all of them, even if it's made very clear it's for charity (as, I assume, yours does). If someone asks me in person, or in a group, I'd probably help out - but I blank every single FB charity post that I see.

And people are discouraged from interacting with it. If they 'like' it, that tells you and anyone else who looks that they've seen it and chosen to not contribute. It's far better for their 'image' to pretend they haven't seen it. So I wouldn't view it as a reflection of your own popularity, rather as a reflection of what people are like.

But, I think that if people see others donating, they'll be far more likely to donate themselves. So maybe it just needs someone to start things off and you'll see more of a response. Perhaps ask some people


I know what you mean by lots of people doing donations etc and pretending they haven't seen it but I'm expecting something from family members and close friends? I think any person deserves that, to get no donations at all would be first of all very embarrassing and secondly quite hurtful. I've been looking up former WCB contenders and I've yet to find one that's posted and got zero attention, come to think of it I've never seen any Facebook friend of mine post for charity and get zero responses. I'm the tiniest bit relaxed as the day isn't out yet but once the days over, what can I tell myself then other than the people I thought who cared don't.

What's upsetting is that this person I know did it last year and he's friends with a lot of people I know and they all made donations etc and went to watch him fight, maybe some of them don't want to as they've already done it once but some of these people are supposed to be really good friends of mine. It's put me in a really rubbishy mood, I keep checking every hour, I'll go away to workout and will then rush to my computer and there's always nothing.
Original post by Xarao
You're complaining because people aren't donating to you?

Oh god, the problems we have in this generation.


My post clarifies that I'm upset because people aren't acknowledging it, such as writing comments of support etc or liking it or saying hey I'll be there on July 13th to cheer you on or even sharing my post for me, you know the small things friends do for each other?. Find some other persons post to start an argument on, mine isn't here for that.
(edited 4 years ago)
Original post by RossyJames96
I know what you mean by lots of people doing donations etc and pretending they haven't seen it but I'm expecting something from family members and close friends? I think any person deserves that, to get no donations at all would be first of all very embarrassing and secondly quite hurtful. I've been looking up former WCB contenders and I've yet to find one that's posted and got zero attention, come to think of it I've never seen any Facebook friend of mine post for charity and get zero responses. I'm the tiniest bit relaxed as the day isn't out yet but once the days over, what can I tell myself then other than the people I thought who cared don't.

What's upsetting is that this person I know did it last year and he's friends with a lot of people I know and they all made donations etc and went to watch him fight, maybe some of them don't want to as they've already done it once but some of these people are supposed to be really good friends of mine. It's put me in a really rubbishy mood, I keep checking every hour, I'll go away to workout and will then rush to my computer and there's always nothing.

You shouldn't ever expect anything from anyone.
It is hurtful that they aren't but no one has to give a donation.

Chances are they haven't seen it, I often miss many posts from people I know on facebook
Original post by RossyJames96
My post clarifies that I'm upset because people aren't acknowledging it, such as writing comments of support etc or liking it or saying hey I'll be there on July 13th to cheer you on or even sharing my post for me, you know the small things friends do for each other?. Find some other persons post to start an argument on, mine isn't here for that.


By acknowledging the post they are showing that they have seen it and then actively chose to not donate. That would probably be more hurtful wouldn't it? At least now you know maybe they just havent seen it
Sorry buddy but no one owes you anything.
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry buddy but no one owes you anything.

So my question is should I find people who actually have my back to be friends with instead. I've done tons of things for my current friends and get nothing in return.
You seem to be assessing whether they have your back on the wrong thing. If you ask for help do they offer? If you ask them to come to your match will they?

I would ignore fundraising requests totally because I don't agree with Most of them and think it's a lot of vanity.
Original post by RossyJames96
So my question is should I find people who actually have my back to be friends with instead. I've done tons of things for my current friends and get nothing in return.
probably because most people would rather donate money to save someones life rather than give them a career
Original post by Gent2324
probably because most people would rather donate money to save someones life rather than give them a career


Uh... the money is going to cancer research, pretty sure that's working on saving peoples lives.
Original post by RossyJames96
Uh... the money is going to cancer research, pretty sure that's working on saving peoples lives.


oh i thought it was to help you become a boxer. not to sure then
Original post by RossyJames96
So my question is should I find people who actually have my back to be friends with instead. I've done tons of things for my current friends and get nothing in return.

I wouldnt get rid of all your friends over something like this, no. You might not find new ones.
Original post by doodle_333
You seem to be assessing whether they have your back on the wrong thing. If you ask for help do they offer? If you ask them to come to your match will they?

I would ignore fundraising requests totally because I don't agree with Most of them and think it's a lot of vanity.


I've sent out messages to about 10-15 different people and all but one person (who is my best friend) said that they'll come. The rest are saying they'll probably be busy, one friend who's genuine, he's going to be on holiday on that date but the rest are basically making excuses to not come in my opinion.

I know I have no proof that they're not going to be busy but for all of them to say it, I think I get the hint that a lot of them dislike me. Some of them could be genuine, but all of them? I don't think so. There's clearly something going on.
Original post by Anonymous
I wouldnt get rid of all your friends over something like this, no. You might not find new ones.


There is that but then why would I want to be friends with them, I'm thinking I'd rather be alone at this point. I'm also feeling upset because last year I had major surgery on my spine and wasn't expected to walk again let alone box, and I know several comments have told me don't expect anything from nobody but I think a lot of people involved in this post would feel upset if their efforts got completely ignored and then to receive a bunch of cop out excuses on why they can't come from so called friends (some of them may be genuine) but as stated above, all of them saying they can't make it? it's given me a real crappy feeling.

I've worked really hard, in just over one year (I had my surgery last March) I've learnt to walk properly again, run and now I'm at a fitness level of being able to run five miles without stopping and okay, that's probably expected as I did need to lose weight as due to my surgery I was very fat but I just thought that I'd get some support for taking up boxing after all of this but I'm not getting any, not even from family members.

My post is still blank, I doubt it's going to receive any attention. Other friends in our circle wouldn't get this treatment so that's whats making me question my friendship with them.
(edited 4 years ago)
why would they want to be friends with you? that's what you need to ask yourself, in the nicest way. what do you bring to the table?
what you've done is admirable, but you should do it for yourself. if your frustrations are coming across on facebook then people are going to want to donate/help you even less.
anyway, you barely gave it a few hours before you posted this. really, I'm lucky if anyone at all even likes my posts. and I don't care. This is why I'm glad i'm not a teenager anymore. don't set so much store by what people do or don't do on social media, it might not reflect how people really feel about you.
Original post by RossyJames96
There is that but then why would I want to be friends with them, I'm thinking I'd rather be alone at this point. I'm also feeling upset because last year I had major surgery on my spine and wasn't expected to walk again let alone box, and I know several comments have told me don't expect anything from nobody but I think a lot of people involved in this post would feel upset if their efforts got completely ignored and then to receive a bunch of cop out excuses on why they can't come from so called friends (some of them may be genuine) but as stated above, all of them saying they can't make it? it's given me a real crappy feeling.

I've worked really hard, in just over one year (I had my surgery last March) I've learnt to walk properly again, run and now I'm at a fitness level of being able to run five miles without stopping and okay, that's probably expected as I did need to lose weight as due to my surgery I was very fat but I just thought that I'd get some support for taking up boxing after all of this but I'm not getting any, not even from family members.

My post is still blank, I doubt it's going to receive any attention. Other friends in our circle wouldn't get this treatment so that's whats making me question my friendship with them.
Original post by sherlockfan
why would they want to be friends with you? that's what you need to ask yourself, in the nicest way. what do you bring to the table?
what you've done is admirable, but you should do it for yourself. if your frustrations are coming across on facebook then people are going to want to donate/help you even less.
anyway, you barely gave it a few hours before you posted this. really, I'm lucky if anyone at all even likes my posts. and I don't care. This is why I'm glad i'm not a teenager anymore. don't set so much store by what people do or don't do on social media, it might not reflect how people really feel about you.

I mean I'm the calm one of the group, I'm always there when a friends down, I rarely ever have a bad word to say anybody so that's probably why it's all coming out now, I don't think I've ever been a bad friend and I've always supported them when they've done things etc. I know it was premature to post this five hours after making my announcement but I was right... It's gone past working hours and it's still the same and I've messaged people asking if they want to come and they don't want to.

I've made sure my frustration hasn't been known to them, it's why I posted on here.
Maybe they don't believe you will go through with it or can do it.
Maybe they will wait until after the event to sponsor you
Reply 18
You're calling out your friends for money that they don't owe you? Sure you're doing it for a good cause but it doesn't mean you have any right over anything, by the sounds of it you're using charity as an excuse to box rather than being concerned about the cause.
Original post by RossyJames96
So for a long time I've wanted to be a boxer, it's something I've kept to myself for some time, it's something I dreamed about when I was unable to walk for two years and now I'm up and walking, running even and I've now finally decided to start my career in white collar.

It seems like a smart place to start things off as I'll get to see what it feels like to perform in front of an audience, if things don't go my way the loss won't count on any amateur record and I'll be raising money for cancer at the same time. Win, loss or draw I'll be joining an amateur boxing gym after it to compete in the amateur rankings, a white collar boxing match will showcase what skills I have and what I need to work on for the future.

So this morning I got the email stating I've been accepted and they'll begin training me on the 20th of May and my fight night is on the 13th July. Great. I instantly set up my JustGiving account, added a small bio and then posted to Facebook in hope that friends would support me... Well.

I understand that many people won't have the money to sponsor me but they haven't even liked or commented on it? I had to double check if I clicked 'share to myself only' which I didn't. :/ It's been five hours since I've posted it now and still nothing. I'm not one of those Facebookers that instantly gets tons of likes but I'll get about 20ish on my photos and statuses, However I've never had no response five hours later when posting a status or picture...

I've checked and close friends and family have been online and then offline again so that isn't the case. Usually they respond to my pictures or posts within an hour or two.

I know the day isn't out yet and that lots of the people I know will be at work but what am I to do or think if it goes past five PM and still nothing? I'm unsure if I'm being over dramatic... Most of you will probably comment saying wait until later on or tomorrow but I need advice now as I'm feeling quite annoyed.

Do you think I need new people in my life if the day blows out and there's still no comments or likes? Family that I live with have already told me that they don't support my choices in becoming a boxer which was a bit hurtful but now my post is being blanked by other people I know it's really got me down.


Good grief, give them a chance! I often have a look at something like this before actually donating much later - come back in a week if no-one has donated.

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