How to explain to my family that I don't have an eating disorder. Watch

Anonymous #1
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A while back I went to my GP for some infection I had but she pointed out that my weight is low and has been dropping over the months instead of increasing (I'm 18) which COULD be one of the reasons this infection wasn't going away. She asked me if I was trying to lose weight and I said no (eventhough I was) - I guess it was just a reflex answer I didn't want her to know I was...because it's just embrassing telling you GP you're trying to lose weight because you look fat and she would probably tell me off and say I'm not etc... Anyways she sent me for a blood test to check why
My mum was with me and when we went home she says why I lied and made this whole thing a big deal
It's true i was trying to lose weight and still am but I know that after I've reached my goal I'll eat normal again.
My parents think I have anorexia because of what my GP said and they always try to force feed me to get me to gain weight and I don't want that. They just don't understand the difference between just wanting to lose some weight and having an eating disorder. How do I explain them that?
I've tried to explain them but they always say I won't admit because that too is part of the disorder :facepalm:
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Anonymous #1
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Anyone?
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henleykt
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Honestly, the only way to stop your parents being suspicious is to actually eat.
You say your at a low weight and it’s been dropping. How low are we talking? Do you skip meals to lose weight?
I’m not saying you have an eating disorder but your parents are right in that not admitting it is a part of it as people don’t believe they have one (even when they do).
It may be beneficial to you to have a session with a therapist (ed specialist) and have a chat. That way you explore whether you may have an ed or not. And if not then you have something to throw back at your parents.
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sinfonietta
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If your goal weight is that low you're just going to put the weight back on once you start eating normally again. This is why yo-yo dieting is a thing.

It might be worth going back to your doctor privately to discuss the issue. Most people with eating disorders don't realise or are in denial that they actually have them. A doctor is more qualified than you yourself are to tell you if you have one or not and, if you do, will be able to help you. A doctor's approach will be a little different from your parents solution of "just force-feed him/her."
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OctoberRain7
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If your GP does get you to gain weight, your weight loss is not healthy. It has caused an actual health problem already. You might think that you’re in control now, but it’s best to listen to people so that you don’t end up with an eating disorder
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AzureCeleste
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Are you skipping meals?
Are you eating as much as you should be?
Is your weight right for your height?

Your parents and doctors may have a point. The fact you lied to the doctor suggests what you are doing isn't healthy, if you were losing weight in a healthy way (and it is necessary that you are) then telling the doctor you were losing weight shouldn't have been a big deal, but it sounds like maybe you aren't.......
Just my perspective on it
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by henleykt)
Honestly, the only way to stop your parents being suspicious is to actually eat.
You say your at a low weight and it’s been dropping. How low are we talking? Do you skip meals to lose weight?
I’m not saying you have an eating disorder but your parents are right in that not admitting it is a part of it as people don’t believe they have one (even when they do).
It may be beneficial to you to have a session with a therapist (ed specialist) and have a chat. That way you explore whether you may have an ed or not. And if not then you have something to throw back at your parents.
But then what's the point...all my effort will have gone to waste if I eat like they want me to.
My GP thinks it's low, i don't think it is. it's around 45kg but I'm not bothered about the weight I just have some fat in my lower abdomen and hips all I really want it to get rid of that
I wouldn't mind if my weight was 50kg and my body was like how I want, it's not about the weight you get me.
My aim is not to look skinny or bony
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by sinfonietta)
If your goal weight is that low you're just going to put the weight back on once you start eating normally again. This is why yo-yo dieting is a thing.

It might be worth going back to your doctor privately to discuss the issue. Most people with eating disorders don't realise or are in denial that they actually have them. A doctor is more qualified than you yourself are to tell you if you have one or not and, if you do, will be able to help you. A doctor's approach will be a little different from your parents solution of "just force-feed him/her."
What's yo yo dieting?

Yes I know but what she thinks will depend on my answers and I already know I don't have it because I just know, whenever I look at pictures of people with anorexia it looks horrifying I'm not trying to look like that!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by AzureCeleste)
Are you skipping meals?
Are you eating as much as you should be?
Is your weight right for your height?

Your parents and doctors may have a point. The fact you lied to the doctor suggests what you are doing isn't healthy, if you were losing weight in a healthy way (and it is necessary that you are) then telling the doctor you were losing weight shouldn't have been a big deal, but it sounds like maybe you aren't.......
Just my perspective on it
I mean I tend to merge lunch & dinner at around 5 ish only because I find it inconvenient to eat out at uni when I'm trying to do work. But if i feel like I'm starving I'll eat something
It's 45kg, I've seen lower at my age I don't think it's that low despite what the BMI tells you
My weight has always been on the low side anyway I don't think the BMI accounts for that. And like I said before it's not about weight, just how my body looks
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Anonymous #2
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honestly as someone who has recovered from an eating disorder you need to be honest to yourself whether you will actually start eating normally once you achieve your goal weight.
The fat in certain areas of your body may just be genetic and may be harder to get rid of.
are you skipping meals? How many calories are you consuming per day? What is your height?
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Anonymous #1
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Also I only lied because appointments are only 10 minute longs I didn't want it to drag on
(Original post by OctoberRain7)
If your GP does get you to gain weight, your weight loss is not healthy. It has caused an actual health problem already. You might think that you’re in control now, but it’s best to listen to people so that you don’t end up with an eating disorder
The infection prolonging wasn't because of the weight, I've had the antibiotics they gave previously it was probably resistant to it or something, the new antibiotic worked fine after that appointment
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AzureCeleste
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I mean I tend to merge lunch & dinner at around 5 ish only because I find it inconvenient to eat out at uni when I'm trying to do work. But if i feel like I'm starving I'll eat something
It's 45kg, I've seen lower at my age I don't think it's that low despite what the BMI tells you
My weight has always been on the low side anyway I don't think the BMI accounts for that. And like I said before it's not about weight, just how my body looks
You may have been lower but it isn't healthy.
Trust your BMI, you clearly must look slightly underweight or your doctor wouldn't have commented on it
45kg is incredibly light. Unless your like 5ft then you should be much heavier
BMI does account though for having weight on the low side- hence the massive range between 18.5 and 24. Anyone who is at a healthy weight fits within this range
You don't need to lose weight to get the body the way you want it though, obviously I can't see how you look, but you must look incredibly thin.

Please speak to a doctor about this, chances are you may have an eating disorder and your eyes are distorting how you actually look

It's not good to merge lunch and dinner, you should eat two separate meals- I hope that it is a larger than normal meal though as you are merging them
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Anonymous #3
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I have anorexia, it’s been 5 years since I was diagnosed and received help for it. Honestly I wish someone helped me sooner bc it seemed like all of a sudden my life was pants, I was removed from school and chucked in hospital. I told myself I would eat when I’m at my goal weight, when I’m not fat, I got to that weight and went even lower. Its so hard to get out of that mindset, the fact that your GP is concerned about your weight, as it’s too low, but you think you’re fat and that you are purposely trying to loose weight is an indicator on an ED. I’m not diagnosing you, I just want to help, because when you get to the weight you want (which is inevitably unhealthy) you won’t be able to eat “normally” again all of a sudden. You’re worth so much more than your weight, don’t fall down this rabbit hole, it’s an absolute living hell. Get help, now. You need to go back to your GP and be honest, you need to be a healthy weight. There is so many repercussions, that affect the rest of your life too, that you can get for being underweight. I’m only 20 and I have the bones of someone in their 60s. Please, please get help.
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username2923348
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Right, time to give you a lesson, you are 45kg, unless you are under 4'5" (legally a dwarf) you are underweight, bordering severely-underweight. It is the result of an eating disorder and from the sounds of things, your dietary habits are questionable at best.

Firstly, I want to make this clear anorexia is an eating disorder. Anorexia nervosa is a psychological mental disorder characterized by self-starvation and extreme dieting. As you have said you wanted to lose weight and you will not eat normally until you achieve your goal, the fact you have reached a very unhealthy low weight indicates you have anorexia. However, I am not a clinical psychologist, so I won't pass diagnosis.

You have an eating disorder. Get that clear in your mind before

This is what you do: You start to eat 3 separate meals a day, you balance your protein as 1.5g per kg of bodyweight, and your carbs at 2.5g per kg of your bodyweight PER DAY. You also make sure to consume at least 1900 calories a day. This is a low amount of calories but your body isn't used to lots of food from the sounds of things.

You need an exercise routine to tone out your body, and to stop an excess fat. Start with light weights, 8-10 reps and 3-5 sets of exercises, this will allow for the most hypertrophy (muscle growth) and allow to better tonality in the muscles.

Women typically carry more fat around the abdomen and the hips, this is natural, and genetic, you cannot change it, but you can reduce the amount and put on muscle in those regions to appear slimmer.

Seriously, you clearly know nothing about healthily losing weight and it has resulted in a clear eating disorder. Eggs, Chicken, Rice, Pasta, all have to be your best friends now, in order to reach a healthy weight and get the body you want.

I know this seems harsh, but I've been where you are, and I recovered.

See your doctor again, be honest with them, also see a dietician, they will help you. But stop kidding yourself, your weight is unhealthy, your BMI is only skewed in the case you are extremely muscular as muscles are denser than fat.
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Anonymous #1
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So you all think that too
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have anorexia, it’s been 5 years since I was diagnosed and received help for it. Honestly I wish someone helped me sooner bc it seemed like all of a sudden my life was pants, I was removed from school and chucked in hospital. I told myself I would eat when I’m at my goal weight, when I’m not fat, I got to that weight and went even lower. Its so hard to get out of that mindset, the fact that your GP is concerned about your weight, as it’s too low, but you think you’re fat and that you are purposely trying to loose weight is an indicator on an ED. I’m not diagnosing you, I just want to help, because when you get to the weight you want (which is inevitably unhealthy) you won’t be able to eat “normally” again all of a sudden. You’re worth so much more than your weight, don’t fall down this rabbit hole, it’s an absolute living hell. Get help, now. You need to go back to your GP and be honest, you need to be a healthy weight. There is so many repercussions, that affect the rest of your life too, that you can get for being underweight. I’m only 20 and I have the bones of someone in their 60s. Please, please get help.
How did they help you?

Thank you I'll try eating better
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Cxesar
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Your in denial eat some chicken!
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username2923348
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So you all think that too
Did you want us to lie? Like I said in my post, it isn't healthy and you need to help yourself
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
honestly as someone who has recovered from an eating disorder you need to be honest to yourself whether you will actually start eating normally once you achieve your goal weight.
The fat in certain areas of your body may just be genetic and may be harder to get rid of.
are you skipping meals? How many calories are you consuming per day? What is your height?
To be completely honest:
Yes. Around 800-1000. 165cm
Is this actually as bad as eveyone is saying?
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username2923348
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(Original post by Anonymous)
To be completely honest:
Yes. Around 800-1000. 165cm
Is this actually as bad as eveyone is saying?
Yes, and the fact you only consume 1000 calories a day is so incredibly dangerous I cannot explain it.

6 y/o children are recommended 1200-2200, you are consuming less than a 6 y/o should
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