My journey to overcome my Eating Disorder/My Eating Disorder - AMA [TW]
Scroll to see replies
Original post by Anonymous
Could I please have some help..
I want to eat something now, not binge, maybe just a slice of toast just to purge it. I don't know why but I just want to purge, but I already have today and haven't eaten since. I just want to throw up and I don't know whats wrong with me. Help pls x
I want to eat something now, not binge, maybe just a slice of toast just to purge it. I don't know why but I just want to purge, but I already have today and haven't eaten since. I just want to throw up and I don't know whats wrong with me. Help pls x
Of course - in this situation and at this time of night, I find it very useful to basically say to myself 'I'm going to bed soon, I won't sleep properly if I eat' and just repeat that to yourself. Also, find something to keep yourself busy - essentially distract yourself from these urges.
Thanks but I just saw this now, just after I purged. I had some porridge oats so nothing much. I will take this advice in the future
Original post by Anonymous
Of course - in this situation and at this time of night, I find it very useful to basically say to myself 'I'm going to bed soon, I won't sleep properly if I eat' and just repeat that to yourself. Also, find something to keep yourself busy - essentially distract yourself from these urges.
Hi, I'm going to join this thread because I've been struggling with disordered eating for 7 years. I had bulimia when I was age 13-15 and have been on and off restricting since I turned 18. I feel too fat to be anorexic though. I know that is such a typical thing for someone with anorexia to say, but it is true for me. Because I keep switching from restricting to eating normally, I never actually get underweight enough for people to notice.
For those of you who are purging, pleaaaseee just try and stop! I know when you get in the habit of doing it every day, it feels like an addiction. Some may say that it is because your brain gets a dopamine rush from doing it. But I'm going to be real with you... the longer you do it, the harder it is to stop. Look up gastroparesis- a condition which can be caused from purging and not eating enough. This is a condition which is irreversible and your stomach can no longer empty food due to nerve damage from purging. Do you really want to only be able to have liquid foods or even worse, only be tube fed for the rest of your life? Then there is the constant risk of having a heart attack or suffering from electrolyte imbalance. NO FOOD will hurt you as much as your eating disorder will.
Also, fighting back against your eating disorder is all about doing opposite actions. Just because you have a thought that says "you need to purge", it doesn't mean you have to listen and do it. Just like if someone with OCD has a thought that says "If you don't tap the wall, your family will get hurt", it doesn't mean they have to tap the wall because that thought holds no truth! Yes, it is challenging and very difficult to go against it, but you do have the power to say NO to your thoughts. I hope what I have said doesn't come across as patronising, I just wanted to share a couple of things that helped me get more insight into my eating disorder. At the end of the day, everything we experience in our brains are just thoughts. Some can be super nasty and traumatising but we have the strength and power to fight back. xx
For those of you who are purging, pleaaaseee just try and stop! I know when you get in the habit of doing it every day, it feels like an addiction. Some may say that it is because your brain gets a dopamine rush from doing it. But I'm going to be real with you... the longer you do it, the harder it is to stop. Look up gastroparesis- a condition which can be caused from purging and not eating enough. This is a condition which is irreversible and your stomach can no longer empty food due to nerve damage from purging. Do you really want to only be able to have liquid foods or even worse, only be tube fed for the rest of your life? Then there is the constant risk of having a heart attack or suffering from electrolyte imbalance. NO FOOD will hurt you as much as your eating disorder will.
Also, fighting back against your eating disorder is all about doing opposite actions. Just because you have a thought that says "you need to purge", it doesn't mean you have to listen and do it. Just like if someone with OCD has a thought that says "If you don't tap the wall, your family will get hurt", it doesn't mean they have to tap the wall because that thought holds no truth! Yes, it is challenging and very difficult to go against it, but you do have the power to say NO to your thoughts. I hope what I have said doesn't come across as patronising, I just wanted to share a couple of things that helped me get more insight into my eating disorder. At the end of the day, everything we experience in our brains are just thoughts. Some can be super nasty and traumatising but we have the strength and power to fight back. xx
Idk why but I just can't stop. Everyone's been going on about the dangers and risks but none of them seem to scare me for some odd reason. I've purged twice today and if I eat anything else, I will do it again and I just can't help it.
It not even about the scale numbers anymore. Idk what to do now.
I'm 16 btw and its been going on since last year October, but it has been getting worse over the past couple of weeks/days.
It not even about the scale numbers anymore. Idk what to do now.
I'm 16 btw and its been going on since last year October, but it has been getting worse over the past couple of weeks/days.
Original post by Anonymous
Hi, I'm going to join this thread because I've been struggling with disordered eating for 7 years. I had bulimia when I was age 13-15 and have been on and off restricting since I turned 18. I feel too fat to be anorexic though. I know that is such a typical thing for someone with anorexia to say, but it is true for me. Because I keep switching from restricting to eating normally, I never actually get underweight enough for people to notice.
For those of you who are purging, pleaaaseee just try and stop! I know when you get in the habit of doing it every day, it feels like an addiction. Some may say that it is because your brain gets a dopamine rush from doing it. But I'm going to be real with you... the longer you do it, the harder it is to stop. Look up gastroparesis- a condition which can be caused from purging and not eating enough. This is a condition which is irreversible and your stomach can no longer empty food due to nerve damage from purging. Do you really want to only be able to have liquid foods or even worse, only be tube fed for the rest of your life? Then there is the constant risk of having a heart attack or suffering from electrolyte imbalance. NO FOOD will hurt you as much as your eating disorder will.
Also, fighting back against your eating disorder is all about doing opposite actions. Just because you have a thought that says "you need to purge", it doesn't mean you have to listen and do it. Just like if someone with OCD has a thought that says "If you don't tap the wall, your family will get hurt", it doesn't mean they have to tap the wall because that thought holds no truth! Yes, it is challenging and very difficult to go against it, but you do have the power to say NO to your thoughts. I hope what I have said doesn't come across as patronising, I just wanted to share a couple of things that helped me get more insight into my eating disorder. At the end of the day, everything we experience in our brains are just thoughts. Some can be super nasty and traumatising but we have the strength and power to fight back. xx
For those of you who are purging, pleaaaseee just try and stop! I know when you get in the habit of doing it every day, it feels like an addiction. Some may say that it is because your brain gets a dopamine rush from doing it. But I'm going to be real with you... the longer you do it, the harder it is to stop. Look up gastroparesis- a condition which can be caused from purging and not eating enough. This is a condition which is irreversible and your stomach can no longer empty food due to nerve damage from purging. Do you really want to only be able to have liquid foods or even worse, only be tube fed for the rest of your life? Then there is the constant risk of having a heart attack or suffering from electrolyte imbalance. NO FOOD will hurt you as much as your eating disorder will.
Also, fighting back against your eating disorder is all about doing opposite actions. Just because you have a thought that says "you need to purge", it doesn't mean you have to listen and do it. Just like if someone with OCD has a thought that says "If you don't tap the wall, your family will get hurt", it doesn't mean they have to tap the wall because that thought holds no truth! Yes, it is challenging and very difficult to go against it, but you do have the power to say NO to your thoughts. I hope what I have said doesn't come across as patronising, I just wanted to share a couple of things that helped me get more insight into my eating disorder. At the end of the day, everything we experience in our brains are just thoughts. Some can be super nasty and traumatising but we have the strength and power to fight back. xx
So update after day 2. I've continued to stop binging and purging and though I've had a few urges here and there, they've been or at least felt far more controllable today.
My day actually started off pretty well to say that we had a big team meeting at work. Now normally these stress me out massively both because these are big meetings and because they're catered, so I feel pressured to eat and so I either eat a little bit, then binge/purge later or I don't eat anything and get suspicious questions. I had no urges whatsoever to binge beforehand and the meeting went pretty well. I also managed to eat a little bit of something (annoyingly carbs because I'm trying to cut them from my diet) - not a huge amount, but enough to avoid the questions. However, that elation at the meeting going well/eating normally meant that I also wanted to binge/purge after finishing work - I'm odd in that basically any strong emotion be it sadness, anger, happiness, etc. triggers the desire in me to binge/purge. I managed to resist and I'm feeling pretty proud of myself that I've gone 60 hours now without binging or purging. I know that I've still got a long way to go, but if I can complete tomorrow, then I'll have stopped binging/purging for the longest time since Christmas. I bought some more binge food today, but less of a desire to eat it. I know I need to stop with that as well, but for now, the key thing is that I'm not in the cycle.
I'm also aware of how little I eat. Even with lunch today, I've only managed 960 calories (which , which is fine, but I've walked about 6 miles today, so burned about a third of that off. I just know at this stage though that I'm not ready to eat any more because of a fear that it'll trigger a binge/purge cycle again and in fact my mind is trying to persuade me to eat less. Had I not had some fruit and a snack bar when I got back from work, I'd have ended up eating around 500 calories for the whole of today and actually would have been fine with that. I'm aware that I'm restricting far too much, but I need to stop the binge/purge stuff first before then tackling my wider issues on portions etc.
Welcome to the thread! It can be a bit maudlin at times, but hopefully we'll all get something positive from it. In a weird way, I'm not sure whether I'm envious that your anorexia hasn't been noticed or concerned. I got down to rather underweight and the attention you get from that is horrible - not the comments praising how skinny you are, but more the ones from people who are concerned or the looks (the looks that people gave me were the worst). Now that triggered some form of recovery and it would be great for you to recover too if you're ready, but on the other hand, the lack of comments would have been a godsend for me. Anyway, just my thoughts on that and use this thread however you want to - post your own experiences etc, we're here to help one another.
I definitely take your points about stopping purging and actually I can say many of the symptoms you mention, I've felt already. It doesn't help that when I was purging as part of anorexia, I used laxatives quite a bit, so I already have problems with constipation (TMI I know). Similarly, the electrolyte imbalance may explain why I occasionally get pains in my arms and legs. But I'm taking it one step at a time and before I can even consider stopping restriction, I have to remove that risk of going into binging/purging behaviour again. You don't come across as patronising at all - your advice is really useful and appreciated because it is about challenging those behavioural tics and saying 'nope, I don't need to do this'.
I wonder whether it might be worth you giving a daily update (or as often as you feel) on here as well - I've found for me, it's kept me focus (I don't want to let myself down and I don't want to let anyone reading this thread down). This thread also means I reflect on my own thoughts and feelings with regard to binging and purging so I can see what's triggering it. It's worth taking sometime to explore that as well I think - why you purge, what the root causes are. For me, it was an inability to process emotions (I've been through some stuff that's basically left me questioning who I am and what I want in life) along with pressure to eat from other people. Once I'd identified those causes, I then started constructing coping strategies and am now at the stage where it boils down to giving up a bad habit.
My day actually started off pretty well to say that we had a big team meeting at work. Now normally these stress me out massively both because these are big meetings and because they're catered, so I feel pressured to eat and so I either eat a little bit, then binge/purge later or I don't eat anything and get suspicious questions. I had no urges whatsoever to binge beforehand and the meeting went pretty well. I also managed to eat a little bit of something (annoyingly carbs because I'm trying to cut them from my diet) - not a huge amount, but enough to avoid the questions. However, that elation at the meeting going well/eating normally meant that I also wanted to binge/purge after finishing work - I'm odd in that basically any strong emotion be it sadness, anger, happiness, etc. triggers the desire in me to binge/purge. I managed to resist and I'm feeling pretty proud of myself that I've gone 60 hours now without binging or purging. I know that I've still got a long way to go, but if I can complete tomorrow, then I'll have stopped binging/purging for the longest time since Christmas. I bought some more binge food today, but less of a desire to eat it. I know I need to stop with that as well, but for now, the key thing is that I'm not in the cycle.
I'm also aware of how little I eat. Even with lunch today, I've only managed 960 calories (which , which is fine, but I've walked about 6 miles today, so burned about a third of that off. I just know at this stage though that I'm not ready to eat any more because of a fear that it'll trigger a binge/purge cycle again and in fact my mind is trying to persuade me to eat less. Had I not had some fruit and a snack bar when I got back from work, I'd have ended up eating around 500 calories for the whole of today and actually would have been fine with that. I'm aware that I'm restricting far too much, but I need to stop the binge/purge stuff first before then tackling my wider issues on portions etc.
Original post by Anonymous
Hi, I'm going to join this thread because I've been struggling with disordered eating for 7 years. I had bulimia when I was age 13-15 and have been on and off restricting since I turned 18. I feel too fat to be anorexic though. I know that is such a typical thing for someone with anorexia to say, but it is true for me. Because I keep switching from restricting to eating normally, I never actually get underweight enough for people to notice.
For those of you who are purging, pleaaaseee just try and stop! I know when you get in the habit of doing it every day, it feels like an addiction. Some may say that it is because your brain gets a dopamine rush from doing it. But I'm going to be real with you... the longer you do it, the harder it is to stop. Look up gastroparesis- a condition which can be caused from purging and not eating enough. This is a condition which is irreversible and your stomach can no longer empty food due to nerve damage from purging. Do you really want to only be able to have liquid foods or even worse, only be tube fed for the rest of your life? Then there is the constant risk of having a heart attack or suffering from electrolyte imbalance. NO FOOD will hurt you as much as your eating disorder will.
Also, fighting back against your eating disorder is all about doing opposite actions. Just because you have a thought that says "you need to purge", it doesn't mean you have to listen and do it. Just like if someone with OCD has a thought that says "If you don't tap the wall, your family will get hurt", it doesn't mean they have to tap the wall because that thought holds no truth! Yes, it is challenging and very difficult to go against it, but you do have the power to say NO to your thoughts. I hope what I have said doesn't come across as patronising, I just wanted to share a couple of things that helped me get more insight into my eating disorder. At the end of the day, everything we experience in our brains are just thoughts. Some can be super nasty and traumatising but we have the strength and power to fight back. xx
For those of you who are purging, pleaaaseee just try and stop! I know when you get in the habit of doing it every day, it feels like an addiction. Some may say that it is because your brain gets a dopamine rush from doing it. But I'm going to be real with you... the longer you do it, the harder it is to stop. Look up gastroparesis- a condition which can be caused from purging and not eating enough. This is a condition which is irreversible and your stomach can no longer empty food due to nerve damage from purging. Do you really want to only be able to have liquid foods or even worse, only be tube fed for the rest of your life? Then there is the constant risk of having a heart attack or suffering from electrolyte imbalance. NO FOOD will hurt you as much as your eating disorder will.
Also, fighting back against your eating disorder is all about doing opposite actions. Just because you have a thought that says "you need to purge", it doesn't mean you have to listen and do it. Just like if someone with OCD has a thought that says "If you don't tap the wall, your family will get hurt", it doesn't mean they have to tap the wall because that thought holds no truth! Yes, it is challenging and very difficult to go against it, but you do have the power to say NO to your thoughts. I hope what I have said doesn't come across as patronising, I just wanted to share a couple of things that helped me get more insight into my eating disorder. At the end of the day, everything we experience in our brains are just thoughts. Some can be super nasty and traumatising but we have the strength and power to fight back. xx
Welcome to the thread! It can be a bit maudlin at times, but hopefully we'll all get something positive from it. In a weird way, I'm not sure whether I'm envious that your anorexia hasn't been noticed or concerned. I got down to rather underweight and the attention you get from that is horrible - not the comments praising how skinny you are, but more the ones from people who are concerned or the looks (the looks that people gave me were the worst). Now that triggered some form of recovery and it would be great for you to recover too if you're ready, but on the other hand, the lack of comments would have been a godsend for me. Anyway, just my thoughts on that and use this thread however you want to - post your own experiences etc, we're here to help one another.I definitely take your points about stopping purging and actually I can say many of the symptoms you mention, I've felt already. It doesn't help that when I was purging as part of anorexia, I used laxatives quite a bit, so I already have problems with constipation (TMI I know). Similarly, the electrolyte imbalance may explain why I occasionally get pains in my arms and legs. But I'm taking it one step at a time and before I can even consider stopping restriction, I have to remove that risk of going into binging/purging behaviour again. You don't come across as patronising at all - your advice is really useful and appreciated because it is about challenging those behavioural tics and saying 'nope, I don't need to do this'.
Original post by Anonymous
Idk why but I just can't stop. Everyone's been going on about the dangers and risks but none of them seem to scare me for some odd reason. I've purged twice today and if I eat anything else, I will do it again and I just can't help it.
It not even about the scale numbers anymore. Idk what to do now.
I'm 16 btw and its been going on since last year October, but it has been getting worse over the past couple of weeks/days.
It not even about the scale numbers anymore. Idk what to do now.
I'm 16 btw and its been going on since last year October, but it has been getting worse over the past couple of weeks/days.
I wonder whether it might be worth you giving a daily update (or as often as you feel) on here as well - I've found for me, it's kept me focus (I don't want to let myself down and I don't want to let anyone reading this thread down). This thread also means I reflect on my own thoughts and feelings with regard to binging and purging so I can see what's triggering it. It's worth taking sometime to explore that as well I think - why you purge, what the root causes are. For me, it was an inability to process emotions (I've been through some stuff that's basically left me questioning who I am and what I want in life) along with pressure to eat from other people. Once I'd identified those causes, I then started constructing coping strategies and am now at the stage where it boils down to giving up a bad habit.
So early update today because, well I messed up. I managed to make it until about 3pm, so the longest I'd gone without binge/purging in 2019, then I started getting more and more anxious and got more and more of a desire to binge, so, me being me, I did just that. It was one of the worst feelings I've had and once I finished purging via vomiting, I then took some laxatives for good measure. I know why it is, I'm meeting up with friends I haven't seen since last year over the weekend and I've put on weight, so I fear they're going to judge me for it. It's silly I know, but I ended up needing that comfort blanket of binge/purging. I feel really conflicted now - I should have posted on here rather than binge/purge and I should just have ignored the urges, but on the other hand, I managed 3 days which is good for me. That said, once I've got this weekend out of the way, there's nothing on the horizon that's causing me anxiety, so it should be easier to stop. It also didn't help that I'd eaten around 900 calories by 2pm and that made me feel like I'd massively overeaten.
Original post by Anonymous
So early update today because, well I messed up. I managed to make it until about 3pm, so the longest I'd gone without binge/purging in 2019, then I started getting more and more anxious and got more and more of a desire to binge, so, me being me, I did just that. It was one of the worst feelings I've had and once I finished purging via vomiting, I then took some laxatives for good measure. I know why it is, I'm meeting up with friends I haven't seen since last year over the weekend and I've put on weight, so I fear they're going to judge me for it. It's silly I know, but I ended up needing that comfort blanket of binge/purging. I feel really conflicted now - I should have posted on here rather than binge/purge and I should just have ignored the urges, but on the other hand, I managed 3 days which is good for me. That said, once I've got this weekend out of the way, there's nothing on the horizon that's causing me anxiety, so it should be easier to stop. It also didn't help that I'd eaten around 900 calories by 2pm and that made me feel like I'd massively overeaten.
Awe, it's ok b. I actually feel sad reading this. But look, you are way stronger than me. You haven't purged for 3 whole days. That's better than anything I could do right now. You are strong and powerful. Feel great about yourself, may I remind you 3 whole days, that's what you call power, you resisted the urges. But babes let me tell you something, even the most powerful person on this earth has days off, even God took a day off when making everything. Look its nothing to be worried about, if you need me or anyone else, just post on here and I will probably reply straight way because I live on TSR. I'm here for you b, don't worry you will be better tomorrow.
My best advice is to tell someone about this because as they say a problem shared is a problem half solved. Tell someone close to you.
But again 3 dayss, babes that's amazing, keep doing it, keep yourself busy and in no time you will be better.
And gaining weight, so what. it not that big of a deal, it's a part of life, you eat you gain, its ok b, you look fine and you definitely do not need to lose weight. You are strong and powerful and don't let any s hit, especially an Eating disorder take that away from you. xx
Original post by DiamondArtist
My friend used to be bulimic a couple of years ago and she got better but recently I'm worried she's bulimic again because she goes to the toilet after every meal and constantly talks about how fat she is. We (my friends) try not to let her go toilet on her own and we always say a mixture of it doesn't matter what weight she is and that she isn't fat at all. She's also started going through phases similar to what you said you do where some weeks she'll eat loads of junk food and then next week she'll hardly have lunch and go to the gym every day. Is there anything you can recommend us to do, like ways you would want your friends to help you?
I would love for my friends to help me, but the difficult thing is actually telling them. Your friend s lucky you guys know, the hard part is done. Give her support, but what I would say is don't always act like your watching her every move. Give her some space but still be there for her. You seem like a great friend and you know your friend better than any of us do so do what;'s best for her. I don't know about her but I hate it when people compliment my body.
Do you think we should bring it up to her and ask her or do you think that would cause her to close off? Thanks for the advice though and I think she's similar to you when receiving compliments but I think its more that she doesn't believe it so she kind of just brushes them off, unlike the compliments we give when her outfit looks good.
Also, if you would love your friends to help that probably means you have great friends and so even though it might be difficult for you to bring it up to them but maybe when you do they'll be able to help you? I would love for my friend to tell us so that we can help her however she would want us to and maybe your friends are the same. I know it'll be difficult for you but maybe consider bringing it up to one of them just so that you know you have a support system with no secrets, and when you feel like you're stuck in a cycle again that one friend might be able to help you.
Also, if you would love your friends to help that probably means you have great friends and so even though it might be difficult for you to bring it up to them but maybe when you do they'll be able to help you? I would love for my friend to tell us so that we can help her however she would want us to and maybe your friends are the same. I know it'll be difficult for you but maybe consider bringing it up to one of them just so that you know you have a support system with no secrets, and when you feel like you're stuck in a cycle again that one friend might be able to help you.
Original post by Anonymous
I would love for my friends to help me, but the difficult thing is actually telling them. Your friend s lucky you guys know, the hard part is done. Give her support, but what I would say is don't always act like your watching her every move. Give her some space but still be there for her. You seem like a great friend and you know your friend better than any of us do so do what;'s best for her. I don't know about her but I hate it when people compliment my body.
Thanks for your advice. And yeh definitely bring it up. Take her to the side, maybe just you and her and say '(insert name) there's something important I need to talk to you about. You know I care about you .... I just want to to be safe and happy.' Don't accuse her of anything say something like 'Random question, you know when you were bulimic before, do you still get bulimic thoughts or anything because I need some advice for someone,' if she says yes then say ' oh, if you need anyone to talk to seriously, I'm here anytime any day call me, text me and I will be there' make sure you reassure her. if you go out for a meal or something. Straight after you eat distract her ask her to take a picture with you and don't stop 'until you get the perfect one' or you say I need to go to the toilet so she may decide not to do it if you're there. tbh I don't really know. This might work, or t might not. Just give it time and she will get better with the right support.
Original post by DiamondArtist
Do you think we should bring it up to her and ask her or do you think that would cause her to close off? Thanks for the advice though and I think she's similar to you when receiving compliments but I think its more that she doesn't believe it so she kind of just brushes them off, unlike the compliments we give when her outfit looks good.
Also, if you would love your friends to help that probably means you have great friends and so even though it might be difficult for you to bring it up to them but maybe when you do they'll be able to help you? I would love for my friend to tell us so that we can help her however she would want us to and maybe your friends are the same. I know it'll be difficult for you but maybe consider bringing it up to one of them just so that you know you have a support system with no secrets, and when you feel like you're stuck in a cycle again that one friend might be able to help you.
Also, if you would love your friends to help that probably means you have great friends and so even though it might be difficult for you to bring it up to them but maybe when you do they'll be able to help you? I would love for my friend to tell us so that we can help her however she would want us to and maybe your friends are the same. I know it'll be difficult for you but maybe consider bringing it up to one of them just so that you know you have a support system with no secrets, and when you feel like you're stuck in a cycle again that one friend might be able to help you.
Original post by Anonymous
Awe, it's ok b. I actually feel sad reading this. But look, you are way stronger than me. You haven't purged for 3 whole days. That's better than anything I could do right now. You are strong and powerful. Feel great about yourself, may I remind you 3 whole days, that's what you call power, you resisted the urges. But babes let me tell you something, even the most powerful person on this earth has days off, even God took a day off when making everything. Look its nothing to be worried about, if you need me or anyone else, just post on here and I will probably reply straight way because I live on TSR. I'm here for you b, don't worry you will be better tomorrow.
My best advice is to tell someone about this because as they say a problem shared is a problem half solved. Tell someone close to you.
But again 3 dayss, babes that's amazing, keep doing it, keep yourself busy and in no time you will be better.
And gaining weight, so what. it not that big of a deal, it's a part of life, you eat you gain, its ok b, you look fine and you definitely do not need to lose weight. You are strong and powerful and don't let any s hit, especially an Eating disorder take that away from you. xx
My best advice is to tell someone about this because as they say a problem shared is a problem half solved. Tell someone close to you.
But again 3 dayss, babes that's amazing, keep doing it, keep yourself busy and in no time you will be better.
And gaining weight, so what. it not that big of a deal, it's a part of life, you eat you gain, its ok b, you look fine and you definitely do not need to lose weight. You are strong and powerful and don't let any s hit, especially an Eating disorder take that away from you. xx
I'm crying reading your reply and that's because you've got so much faith that I can do this. I just feel like such an idiot for succumbing to the urges when I knew that this would be how I would feel afterwards and it's just triggered a desire to binge/purge again to punish myself (I'm not going to do that though). I'll definitely take you up in your offer though and likewise, I'm here for you when you stop binge/purging. I still don't feel like I can tell anyone sadly because I don't want to take up anyone's time with this. The weight gain concerns me on one way, but in another with my massive restricting, I lost 7lbs last week.
Original post by DiamondArtist
Do you think we should bring it up to her and ask her or do you think that would cause her to close off? Thanks for the advice though and I think she's similar to you when receiving compliments but I think its more that she doesn't believe it so she kind of just brushes them off, unlike the compliments we give when her outfit looks good.
Also, if you would love your friends to help that probably means you have great friends and so even though it might be difficult for you to bring it up to them but maybe when you do they'll be able to help you? I would love for my friend to tell us so that we can help her however she would want us to and maybe your friends are the same. I know it'll be difficult for you but maybe consider bringing it up to one of them just so that you know you have a support system with no secrets, and when you feel like you're stuck in a cycle again that one friend might be able to help you.
Also, if you would love your friends to help that probably means you have great friends and so even though it might be difficult for you to bring it up to them but maybe when you do they'll be able to help you? I would love for my friend to tell us so that we can help her however she would want us to and maybe your friends are the same. I know it'll be difficult for you but maybe consider bringing it up to one of them just so that you know you have a support system with no secrets, and when you feel like you're stuck in a cycle again that one friend might be able to help you.
This web page gives loads of useful advice for how to help your friend (https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/recovery-information/worried-about-friend). I think that I wouldn't have all of you speak to her as one. If you 'gang up on her' so to speak, it'll simply make her feel overwhelmed and reinforce the eating disorder (it did that with me). It's likely that she doesn't actually realise there's a problem at this stage. When I was anorexic, I didn't realise how thin I was and I describe it as a sort of blindness really - you're blind to what's going on and what you really look like. Reassure her that you're there for her, but don't make it sound like you're talking about her behind her back. Eating disorders can come with a massive amount of paranoia and you don't want to reinforce that.
Usually when I eat something it quickly triggers me to eat more food. How can I stop that and understand my body?
3 daysss??!! OMGG girll!!
Well done. I’m sooo proud of you. I know how hard it is so Well done for that.
Well done. I’m sooo proud of you. I know how hard it is so Well done for that.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm crying reading your reply and that's because you've got so much faith that I can do this. I just feel like such an idiot for succumbing to the urges when I knew that this would be how I would feel afterwards and it's just triggered a desire to binge/purge again to punish myself (I'm not going to do that though). I'll definitely take you up in your offer though and likewise, I'm here for you when you stop binge/purging. I still don't feel like I can tell anyone sadly because I don't want to take up anyone's time with this. The weight gain concerns me on one way, but in another with my massive restricting, I lost 7lbs last week.
I definitely do have faith that you can do this, could put my life on it. You are powerful and amazing, keep it up. You don't have to tell anyone right now, but I promise you, they'll be grateful you told them, if my friend told me something like this I would be glad they trust me. Just keep posting on here and I'll try my best to encourage you. We can get through this together.
And yeh I hope I stop. I haven't purged today, but then again I haven't really eaten so yh ...
Original post by Anonymous
Usually when I eat something it quickly triggers me to eat more food. How can I stop that and understand my body?
I remember Kathy Bates of American Horror Story and Misery fame spoke about a breathing technique she used. Basically, when she was eating, she said our stomachs all seem to give this little sigh when full and it's basically listening for that sigh. I used to think it was nonsense til I tried it and that worked for me for a while.
Original post by Anonymous
3 daysss??!! OMGG girll!!
Well done. I’m sooo proud of you. I know how hard it is so Well done for that.
Well done. I’m sooo proud of you. I know how hard it is so Well done for that.
Thanks, I don't feel that way, but thanks all the same. I should say, to completely confound expectations, I'm actually a guy which I admit does seem rather unusual when it comes to eating disorders.
Original post by Anonymous
I definitely do have faith that you can do this, could put my life on it. You are powerful and amazing, keep it up. You don't have to tell anyone right now, but I promise you, they'll be grateful you told them, if my friend told me something like this I would be glad they trust me. Just keep posting on here and I'll try my best to encourage you. We can get through this together.
And yeh I hope I stop. I haven't purged today, but then again I haven't really eaten so yh ...
And yeh I hope I stop. I haven't purged today, but then again I haven't really eaten so yh ...
Thanks - that means a lot. I get what you're saying, but they'd just think I'm a burden. I'm the type of person who offers advice to other people and listens to their problems and because I do that and hear what problems they have, I think do they want to be burdened by me?
Definitely and same to you as well - we can do this. I found that at this stage it's easier not to worry about how little I'm eating, just to focus on avoiding binging and purging.
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks - that means a lot. I get what you're saying, but they'd just think I'm a burden. I'm the type of person who offers advice to other people and listens to their problems and because I do that and hear what problems they have, I think do they want to be burdened by me?
Definitely and same to you as well - we can do this. I found that at this stage it's easier not to worry about how little I'm eating, just to focus on avoiding binging and purging.
Definitely and same to you as well - we can do this. I found that at this stage it's easier not to worry about how little I'm eating, just to focus on avoiding binging and purging.
It's really weird that had a feeling you might be a guy and I was so tempted to say 'girlll' so many times, but I didn't want to assume.
but yeh I give people advice all the time and the first time I told my friend about my sexual abuse, I felt weird because people usually come to me for their problems, but sometimes you need to see things from a different perspective. My friend was happy to help, especially since I've helped her so many times. Trust me your friends will appreciate it because it sometimes we need to let others have a turn, ygm. You will not be a burden to anyone. If I was your friend I would be so happy to help and make a difference in someone's life.
Original post by Anonymous
It's really weird that had a feeling you might be a guy and I was so tempted to say 'girlll' so many times, but I didn't want to assume.
but yeh I give people advice all the time and the first time I told my friend about my sexual abuse, I felt weird because people usually come to me for their problems, but sometimes you need to see things from a different perspective. My friend was happy to help, especially since I've helped her so many times. Trust me your friends will appreciate it because it sometimes we need to let others have a turn, ygm. You will not be a burden to anyone. If I was your friend I would be so happy to help and make a difference in someone's life.
but yeh I give people advice all the time and the first time I told my friend about my sexual abuse, I felt weird because people usually come to me for their problems, but sometimes you need to see things from a different perspective. My friend was happy to help, especially since I've helped her so many times. Trust me your friends will appreciate it because it sometimes we need to let others have a turn, ygm. You will not be a burden to anyone. If I was your friend I would be so happy to help and make a difference in someone's life.
That's ok - I feel quite abrupt and disrespectful for correcting someone and I think it's why I'm anon at the moment, because I still think there's somewhat of a stigma surrounding men and eating disorders. It's one of the reasons I've not told anyone as well, well that and I think so much of this is caused by or related to anxiety - I've also got OCD and suffer from trichotillomania.
That's true, but one of my friends has gone through so much recently and is just rebuilding his life that I don't feel that I can burden him at all. I've been helping him through so much and to then ask for his help back feels so wrong when he's suffering so badly. Thank you for your offer of help though - I'll definitely be posting on here and quoting you and as I say, my offer of helping you always stands as well.
Thank you so much for your help! You're not an idiot for succumbing to the urges either, it's just something you can't help. Everyone coming to this thread, and everyone that you know, has faith that you can do this. It's not going to happen quickly but just trust or learn to trust in yourself and one day it'll be a thing of the past and something that you have better control over.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm crying reading your reply and that's because you've got so much faith that I can do this. I just feel like such an idiot for succumbing to the urges when I knew that this would be how I would feel afterwards and it's just triggered a desire to binge/purge again to punish myself (I'm not going to do that though). I'll definitely take you up in your offer though and likewise, I'm here for you when you stop binge/purging. I still don't feel like I can tell anyone sadly because I don't want to take up anyone's time with this. The weight gain concerns me on one way, but in another with my massive restricting, I lost 7lbs last week.
This web page gives loads of useful advice for how to help your friend (https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/recovery-information/worried-about-friend). I think that I wouldn't have all of you speak to her as one. If you 'gang up on her' so to speak, it'll simply make her feel overwhelmed and reinforce the eating disorder (it did that with me). It's likely that she doesn't actually realise there's a problem at this stage. When I was anorexic, I didn't realise how thin I was and I describe it as a sort of blindness really - you're blind to what's going on and what you really look like. Reassure her that you're there for her, but don't make it sound like you're talking about her behind her back. Eating disorders can come with a massive amount of paranoia and you don't want to reinforce that.
This web page gives loads of useful advice for how to help your friend (https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/recovery-information/worried-about-friend). I think that I wouldn't have all of you speak to her as one. If you 'gang up on her' so to speak, it'll simply make her feel overwhelmed and reinforce the eating disorder (it did that with me). It's likely that she doesn't actually realise there's a problem at this stage. When I was anorexic, I didn't realise how thin I was and I describe it as a sort of blindness really - you're blind to what's going on and what you really look like. Reassure her that you're there for her, but don't make it sound like you're talking about her behind her back. Eating disorders can come with a massive amount of paranoia and you don't want to reinforce that.
Original post by DiamondArtist
Thank you so much for your help! You're not an idiot for succumbing to the urges either, it's just something you can't help. Everyone coming to this thread, and everyone that you know, has faith that you can do this. It's not going to happen quickly but just trust or learn to trust in yourself and one day it'll be a thing of the past and something that you have better control over.
Thanks and it just feels like I should be able to control this - I could control all these urges when I had anorexia, so why can't I now?
Original post by DiamondArtist
Thank you so much for your help! You're not an idiot for succumbing to the urges either, it's just something you can't help. Everyone coming to this thread, and everyone that you know, has faith that you can do this. It's not going to happen quickly but just trust or learn to trust in yourself and one day it'll be a thing of the past and something that you have better control over.
I should also add that if you ever want more advice or just to vent (because it's tricky to support someone with an eating disorder), by all means post on here.
Quick Reply
Latest
Trending
Trending
Articles for you
Halls vs home: should I stay at home and commute to university or move out into halls or other student accommodation?
Why I chose a law degree and what studying law was like
Writing a psychology personal statement: expert advice from universities
10 things new lawyers wish they'd known before studying law