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Incels.

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Original post by sinfonietta
Yes, I know them in real life, and no I don't treat them any differently than anyone else.


Well good for you I might try to avoid them at most due to their hatred of women and being a female as well.
Original post by Wired_1800
I disagree. Elliot was crazy and one who blamed women for his issues.


That is precisely what incels do.
(edited 4 years ago)
Original post by Trotsky's Iceaxe
That is precisely what incels do.


I don't think so.
Original post by Wired_1800
I don't think so.


You evidently aren't familiar with the term incel.

Urban dictionary sums it up nicely:

aka "involuntarily celibate", a person (usually male) who has a horrible personality and treats women like sexual objects and thinks his lack of a sex life comes from being "ugly" when its really just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude. incels have little to no self awareness; even when they see other "ugly" men with girlfriends, they consider these men to be tricksters who have somehow beat the system and can get women despite being cursed with unattractiveness (in other words, theyre respectful to women and women are attracted to their personalities, but incels cant comprehend such a phenomenon). they believe that women owe them sex, and many of the more extreme incels like to spend time in incel communities on the internet coming up with ways to make women have sex with them (often involving genocide of people of color, genocide of "Chads" (men who have sex), taking rights away from women, raping them, having sex with women's dead bodies, and other horrid, disgusting things. they cant understand that that is PRECISELY why women want nothing to do with them).

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=incel

Or from wikipedia:

Discussions in incel forums are often characterized by resentment, misanthropy,[1] self-pity,[10] self-loathing,[11] misogyny,[12] racism,[12] a sense of entitlement to sex, and the endorsement of violence against sexually active people.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel
Original post by Trotsky's Iceaxe
You evidently aren't familiar with the term incel.

Urban dictionary sums it up nicely:

aka "involuntarily celibate", a person (usually male) who has a horrible personality and treats women like sexual objects and thinks his lack of a sex life comes from being "ugly" when its really just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude. incels have little to no self awareness; even when they see other "ugly" men with girlfriends, they consider these men to be tricksters who have somehow beat the system and can get women despite being cursed with unattractiveness (in other words, theyre respectful to women and women are attracted to their personalities, but incels cant comprehend such a phenomenon). they believe that women owe them sex, and many of the more extreme incels like to spend time in incel communities on the internet coming up with ways to make women have sex with them (often involving genocide of people of color, genocide of "Chads" (men who have sex), taking rights away from women, raping them, having sex with women's dead bodies, and other horrid, disgusting things. they cant understand that that is PRECISELY why women want nothing to do with them).

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=incel

Or from wikipedia:

Discussions in incel forums are often characterized by resentment, misanthropy,[1] self-pity,[10] self-loathing,[11] misogyny,[12] racism,[12] a sense of entitlement to sex, and the endorsement of violence against sexually active people.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel


Surely a man or woman can be "involuntarily celibate" without fitting into that above category?

I mean, I would say it's pretty unfair to assume that a person who can't find a sexual partner must be a horrible sexist weirdo.

I would feel sympathy for a man or woman who cannot find a romantic/sexual partner.
Original post by Trotsky's Iceaxe
You evidently aren't familiar with the term incel.

Urban dictionary sums it up nicely:

aka "involuntarily celibate", a person (usually male) who has a horrible personality and treats women like sexual objects and thinks his lack of a sex life comes from being "ugly" when its really just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude. incels have little to no self awareness; even when they see other "ugly" men with girlfriends, they consider these men to be tricksters who have somehow beat the system and can get women despite being cursed with unattractiveness (in other words, theyre respectful to women and women are attracted to their personalities, but incels cant comprehend such a phenomenon). they believe that women owe them sex, and many of the more extreme incels like to spend time in incel communities on the internet coming up with ways to make women have sex with them (often involving genocide of people of color, genocide of "Chads" (men who have sex), taking rights away from women, raping them, having sex with women's dead bodies, and other horrid, disgusting things. they cant understand that that is PRECISELY why women want nothing to do with them).

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=incel

Or from wikipedia:

Discussions in incel forums are often characterized by resentment, misanthropy,[1] self-pity,[10] self-loathing,[11] misogyny,[12] racism,[12] a sense of entitlement to sex, and the endorsement of violence against sexually active people.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel


Did you actually reference Urban Dictionary as your evidence? Really?

Also, it is too lazy to take out few examples and draw conclusions.

Also, incels can be women as well.
Original post by Wired_1800
Did you actually reference Urban Dictionary as your evidence? Really?

Also, it is too lazy to take out few examples and draw conclusions.

Also, incels can be women as well.


A few examples? I mean I’ve never met a decent person who was an incel. It’s not their fault, after all they’ve been trapped in a terrible community at young ages. But I’ve never met a nice incel.
Why do you even care lol? Maybe you should sleep with them?
Original post by Wired_1800
Did you actually reference Urban Dictionary as your evidence? Really?

Also, it is too lazy to take out few examples and draw conclusions.

Also, incels can be women as well.

I know there are female incels but rn it’s extremely male dominated
Original post by karl pilkington
Why do you even care lol? Maybe you should sleep with them?


I am so confused 😂
Original post by Olivia.Omo16
I know there are female incels but rn it’s extremely male dominated


It is because it is easier for women to have sex. Most can pick a random lad from the street, but men have to work hard for it.
Original post by Anonymous
A few examples? I mean I’ve never met a decent person who was an incel. It’s not their fault, after all they’ve been trapped in a terrible community at young ages. But I’ve never met a nice incel.


How do you even know if someone is involuntarily celibate?

Do you know people who announce that in real life? I'd have thought they'd have been embarrassed and kept it quiet.

So surely you might know some men or women who are nice people, but are actually involuntarily celibate without you being aware?
Original post by Anonymous
A few examples? I mean I’ve never met a decent person who was an incel. It’s not their fault, after all they’ve been trapped in a terrible community at young ages. But I’ve never met a nice incel.


That’s fair, but it does not mean there are no nice incels.
Original post by Wired_1800
Did you actually reference Urban Dictionary as your evidence? Really?

Also, it is too lazy to take out few examples and draw conclusions.

Also, incels can be women as well.


Yes I did. Sure it is acerbic, but would you care to explain why the definition is incorrect?

You appear to be labouring under the false assumption that an incel is simply someone who can't get laid. As anyone who hasn't lived under a rock for the last few years will be aware, the term incel is used specifically for someone who also carries a lot of toxic baggage (see the definition).

There are plenty of lengthy articles discussing incels. You are more than welcome to google them. You may learn something.
Original post by Anonymous
How do you even know if someone is involuntarily celibate?

Do you know people who announce that in real life? I'd have thought they'd have been embarrassed and kept it quiet.

So surely you might know some men or women who are nice people, but are actually involuntarily celibate without you being aware?


Incels is a group people join. Sure there are people that don’t have sex but they aren’t ‘incels’ because to be an incel you have to label yourself with that name
Original post by Wired_1800
Also, incels can be women as well.


The term "involuntary celibate" was coined by a woman named Alana in the 1990s.
She wanted to provide a friendly and inclusive community for all lonely people who wanted to date/have sexual relationships but for a variety of reasons found themselves unable to do so.
Originally everyone was welcomed at Alana’s Involuntary Celibacy Project no matter how eccentric they were, then Alana passed the site on to someone else.
An angry manosphere-esque subculture became prevalent, took over the website and began branching out towards the more aggressive incel communities that are now notorious like reddit's incels & incel.me.

Almost all the current online incel forums don't allow female members.
Nor do the more aggressive incel websites without pm/live chat features, although one site does have a female mod volunteer.
The most antisocial sites like incel.me openly operated a definition of incels that specifically excluded females from membership of their incel community.
If I recall correctly the explanation incel.me offered was along the lines of "femoids are not incel or volcel"- "they are all rxxxxxxx or waiting for Chad".
I've had to redact the r word to avoid antagonizing TSRs mods, I'm female but quoting that derogatory term risks a warning or ban.
Original post by londonmyst
The term "involuntary celibate" was coined by a woman named Alana in the 1990s.
She wanted to provide a friendly and inclusive community for all lonely people who wanted to date/have sexual relationships but for a variety of reasons found themselves unable to do so.
Originally everyone was welcomed at Alana’s Involuntary Celibacy Project no matter how eccentric they were, then Alana passed the site on to someone else.
An angry manosphere-esque subculture became prevalent, took over the website and began branching out towards the more aggressive incel communities that are now notorious like reddit's incels & incel.me.

Almost all the current online incel forums don't allow female members.
Nor do the more aggressive incel websites without pm/live chat features, although one site does have a female mod volunteer.
The most antisocial sites like incel.me openly operated a definition of incels that specifically excluded females from membership of their incel community.
If I recall correctly the explanation incel.me offered was along the lines of "femoids are not incel or volcel"- "they are all rxxxxxxx or waiting for Chad".
I've had to redact the r word to avoid antagonizing TSRs mods, I'm female but quoting that derogatory term risks a warning or ban.


I still believe that there are female incels. Just because certain groups of men have hijacked a subculture does not mean that female incels don't exist.
Original post by Trotsky's Iceaxe
Yes I did. Sure it is acerbic, but would you care to explain why the definition is incorrect?

You appear to be labouring under the false assumption that an incel is simply someone who can't get laid. As anyone who hasn't lived under a rock for the last few years will be aware, the term incel is used specifically for someone who also carries a lot of toxic baggage (see the definition).

There are plenty of lengthy articles discussing incels. You are more than welcome to google them. You may learn something.


These are selected articles and negative portrayals of a big diverse group of people.
Original post by Anonymous
Incels is a group people join. Sure there are people that don’t have sex but they aren’t ‘incels’ because to be an incel you have to label yourself with that name


Fair enough.

I suppose I was just using the term in its literal sense.
Original post by Trotsky's Iceaxe
Yes I did. Sure it is acerbic, but would you care to explain why the definition is incorrect?

You appear to be labouring under the false assumption that an incel is simply someone who can't get laid. As anyone who hasn't lived under a rock for the last few years will be aware, the term incel is used specifically for someone who also carries a lot of toxic baggage (see the definition).

There are plenty of lengthy articles discussing incels. You are more than welcome to google them. You may learn something.


I was also using "incel" in this thread to mean "someone who can't get laid". I thought that's what it meant - involuntarily celibate.

To be perfectly honest though, the vast majority of people in the real world won't have a clue what an "incel" is. :tongue: It's kind of a weird internet term that the average person won't have heard of.
Original post by Wired_1800
I still believe that there are female incels. Just because certain groups of men have hijacked a subculture does not mean that female incels don't exist.


Yes, there are plenty of lonely single people who have never had romantic relationships and crave them- women and men.
But most sane people would sooner wear a clown costume for the rest of their lives than start publicly identifying as incels.
All the lonely singles I know just say that they are single, single & looking for a relationship or virgins (if religiously inclined).
One very religious female friend is almost at her wits end, she believes in abstinence until marriage and is desperate to find a husband but insists upon restricting herself to equally religious guys that only read the same bible version and are less than six months older than her.
She is desperate but not desperate enough to label herself an incel.

The incel community now has a terrible reputation amongst most of mainstream society, does not welcome women and as a consequence the incel term is now inextricably tarnished by the prevalent popular culture association with toxic incels.
I think the original 'involuntary celibate' rhetoric was an accidental example of textbook identity politics based on lack of a sex life, hinting at an oppression narrative and a group identity revolving around victimhood and conspiracy theories to support claims of victimhood was predictable.
Though not the large scale of active self-professed incels.

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