I want to convert to Christianity

Sorry in advance if this gets too long, currently 1am in the morning & my brain won’t shut off, so here we go I guess; I’m a 15 year old British Muslim born in Sheffield, my late mother was also a Muslim, born in Lahore, Pakistan, unfortunately she passed away when I was 13. My father was an atheist, but converted to Islam to be with my mother, unfortunately he too died when I was 8 years old, fighting in Afghanistan (operation Herrick) he was one of the many Royal Marines sent there for Aid, I now live with my mothers side of the family, as nobody knows anything about my dads side of the family, as nobody’s ever met my dads parents or siblings if he even has any 🤷*♂️, What I really wanted to say today was that, I’ve been through hell for most of my life , moving from here to there, getting involved with drugs, alcohol & gangs, but not so long ago my cousin & her husband took me in (which I highly appreciate) and moved to Manchester, I’ve had a lot of time to think & ultimately, I started wondering if Islam is really what I believe in and what my parents would think if i decided otherwise, but I’ve decided that, really, it’s my life & i want to live it to its fullest and believe what I have faith in, I’ve read a lot about Christianity, I secretly went to church to see what it’s like, I cannot express in words what’s I felt the first time I prayed to god in church, i suddenly felt a strong bond, almost like a connection. From that moment onwards I knew I wanted to be a Christian, it all just makes sense to me, and I believe Jesus Christ guided me to him, and showed me the light. Now this all may sound very wonderful and glorious, but now the only problem I face is telling my auntie and my cousin, which are all very very religious Muslims, and always tell me stuff like ‘when you grow up we will take you to umra, then we will move back to our home country (Pakistan)’ I always get uncomfortable and anxious when they say that, as frankly I really do not want to move to Pakistan, like ever, I was born on British soul & I hope to die on british soil, but I just don’t have enough courage to say that to them, never mind tell them that I no longer want to follow Islam, I couldn’t bare to think what their reaction would be 😬 I honestly don’t know what to do ... don’t know if this would help but I’m thinking of joining the royal marine commandos as soon as I turn 18, I’m already very physically fit & my mind hasn’t been through enough to have the ‘state of mind’, I tried talking to my cousin about this and she Freaked out, saying stuff like she will never let me end up like my farther, and that if I am going to join she will never let me join the British armed forces, she will only let me join the Pakistani armed forces, why on earth would I spend all my life in britain, then decide to fight for a completely different country ? That makes no sense to me. If anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks, Thomas.

Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'oon (We belong to Allah and to Allah we shall return.)
May Allah give them an easy and pleasant journey and shower blessings on your parents graves.
Ameen.

You've been through a lot and I am happy you are reflective upon it.

You know coming from me, being a Muslim, you know I am not going to suggest you leave and even more so because I think you were so busy going through difficult things in life that I don't think you have taken the time to consider Islam.
You have prayed in a church, but have you done whudhu and attended prayer at a mosque or recited qur'aan or prayed for your parents?
I have not always been a practicing Muslim, but I have not felt a stronger bond since practicing.
It is something that I want you to consider bearing in mind I have previously considered other religions when my iman was weak.

OP you do know that there is a photo attached right?

Lmao that was an accident 😂😂😂

Pakistan is a beautiful country (for the most part) to live in. I know young people who have gone back to live there and they enjoy it more than they do here so you may want to consider going there for a few weeks and only if you enjoy it or see if it is suitable for you then you can consider staying, if not then I suggest you don't go but there is no harm in trying things out.

I can understand your cousins fear in terms of joining the army.
I don't know much about working for the army so I am not going to comment on it would make sense to join the army for the country that you are going to live in the future be it the UK or Pakistan.

Thankyou, 😁
I used to go to mosque and read Quran, which gave me some comfort after learning my dad had died. Few years later, my mum passed away & that was just enough for me, I just lost all faith, started pushing everyone away, didn’t talk to anyone, started doing all sorts of stuff, my life was like a downhill spiral, started believing in Christianity and praying to god, which felt so much more different and comforting.

Yeah I agree, I told my cousin I would love to go to Pakistan, as a lot of my family is there & plus it’s a whole new experience so we should be going this September

This post reminded me of this video.
If you want to watch it, grab earphones.


You've been to mosque and recited qur'aan there but have you willingly opened a qur'aan in your own time and space, or prayed in your own time and space.
I went to mosque at an early age and stopped at an early age but praying now and reciting now is a different experience entirely.

I am not dismissing what you are saying about Christianity though, I've understood that.

Yeah, I have been and it is a great experience.
For my future though, it's not something I would consider but I know a lot of young people who have gone and wanted to stay/ stayed.

Have a nice time and make sure to indulge in the street food.

I understand you have had life rough from a young age.
Try read the Quraan and understand some of the translation behind it. Every line is beautiful.
Honestly if you pray your 5 times salaat and make duaa Allah will make things easy for you.
It sounds difficult but its only a small fraction of your time.
I am praying for you well-being brother.

Dont think I’ve ever read Quran or prayed in my own time, but I think I’ll give it a shot. That video was also very inspiring, thankyou 😁

It's Friday prayer today, brother you should attend that.
Ikr, it was this video that came in to my recommended on YT back when my Iman was low and it really got me reconsidering my relationship with Islam
Thank you for being patient and watching it

There are more on his channel if you ever have spare time maybe watch them

I made a thread like this recently. Don't mention or focus on your previous religion, it's looking and asking for conflict.