A-Level/education fix

So I have a slight problem... I lost the interest in studying I’m really ungrateful because I know that my parents and everyone around me put much effort just to get me to study..Education is a right and a privilege for some .. I know I need to do something in life because otherwise I’d be homeless... TL;DR I lost my love in education I procrastinated for about a year I never opened a book and read .. I always say I have dyslexia and cry everyday.. truth is I don’t want to study I don’t know why... Back in year 11 I cried when my parents booked a holiday just because I couldn’t study.. I spent at least 15 hours reading and now I can’t be even bothered to watch A-level videos on YouTube or by paid subscriptions... I even broke my phone in anger that I couldn’t study .. I loved studying.. I know education in my family background means an escape from poverty and I know I need to study but I don’t know what happened to me all I do is cry because I’m a failure... I can’t read a student book because it’s too long there’s too many words if I read the revision guide then I get a B or a C.. Why do people study?? I haven’t applied to a university because my predicted grades are really bad since I didn’t revise during mocks.. I tried to watch motivational videos .. but nothing helps . I know that If I study then it’s something that I get to keep. You reap what you sow and without education I’d probably end up being homeless. I’ll cry in the future saying that I wasted my life just because I didn’t do my A-levels like I get the importance but I don’t know what to do ... I lost a will to carry on not just in education but in other fields.Unjaded jade and everyone doesn’t help like I watched their videos but it doesn’t help.What can I do? sorry for writing this essay How do I love education and studying??

You need to stop putting yourself in the box that says you have study to in a certain way , if it doesn't go in by reading try interactive things like flashcards.

It’s my parents that tell me I have to read .. I mean they love me but it sucks at the same time but yeah I ought to do more flashcards and other methods

Your parents aren't dyslexic I presume? They re presumably do so because they were told to encourage you to or they don't understand.

Thanks Claire