Girlfriend still reads smut, what to do?

Before when we were friends she'd hide it from anyone. But now when we're in a relationship she openly reads smut between boys and say things to me such as "I can imagine you doing this...or this. You'll look adorable here"

I honestly don't know how to feel here? I thought she was just teasing me since I always feel embarrassed everytime she brings it up. Even now I feel embarrassed talking about it right now. My friend said that it's weird but I personally think that I should accept her interests but at the same time I'm worried she's more entertained with the guys in the books she reads.

Weird place to ask this sorry.

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Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Nevermind I'm not ready yet, how can I delete this?

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

Do you watch porn? Essentially the same thing, however it is weird for her to talk about your involvement in this fantasy fetish writing. Have you explained it makes you feel uncomfortable?

Reply 3

1582

Volunteer Team

If it bothers you ask her to not make those comments about you specifically.

I've read and written M/M erotica for 13 years. I have never compared the person I'm with to the characters in the book - openly or in my mind.

(edited 4 years ago)

Reply 4

Tootles

Original post by Anonymous

Read smut with her? Write smut for her?

Original post by sinfonietta

This.

Reply 5

mgi

Original post by Anonymous

Let her read whatever she likes. You are not her mum and you are not a control freak. Refuse to feel insecure. I am sure you like her for lots of reasons. Talk to her more! Write some poems to her! just chill!

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Do you watch porn? Essentially the same thing, however it is weird for her to talk about your involvement in this fantasy fetish writing. Have you explained it makes you feel uncomfortable?

Nope. Also I tried to tell her in a jokey sort of way but I don't think it's working.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by sinfonietta

I've tried to tell her in a jokey way. Should I just try to learn more about her interests? I was giving it some thought but should I be happy that she's thinking of me? Or is this a whole different situation?

Reply 8

1582

Volunteer Team

Original post by Anonymous

Be more direct rather than saying it in a 'jokey' way. She doesn't know you mean it.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

Original post by Tootles

Read smut with her? Write smut for her?

This.

I was thinking about doing that too. I've tried reading some of the ones she recommended me and I'll admit that they had a good plot but some had a lot of rapey vibes to it that put me off.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

Original post by mgi

I was worried that I was being a control freak but I do feel kinda uncomfortable when she imagines me in some of the situations as some situations can seem quite rapey.

Reply 11

Tootles

Original post by Anonymous

I was thinking about doing that too. I've tried reading some of the ones she recommended me and I'll admit that they had a good plot but some had a lot of rapey vibes to it that put me off.

Women like weird things, just like we like wierd things that women don't.

Read her smut while she's in the bath :colone:

Reply 12

karl pilkington

Are you a bloke and she is reading gay erotic books which involve m/m gay storylines? The whole thing is kind of a bit odd. However I don't know why you are upset though it doesn't really matter.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

Original post by Tootles

Women like weird things, just like we like wierd things that women don't.

Read her smut while she's in the bath :colone:

Fair point I suppose. I've read her smut before and I'll admit that some plots were interesting.

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

Original post by karl pilkington

Are you a bloke and she is reading gay erotic books which involve m/m gay storylines? The whole thing is kind of a bit odd. However I don't know why you are upset though it doesn't really matter.

I guess I just feel uncomfortable when she imagines me in one of those rapey situations that happen in some of her smut. Or when she gets ideas to try out some pretty weird things in bed.

Reply 15

karl pilkington

Original post by Anonymous

I guess I just feel uncomfortable when she imagines me in one of those rapey situations that happen in some of her smut. Or when she gets ideas to try out some pretty weird things in bed.

What kind of things does she want to try out? Does she only read mandm gay erotica does she ever want to involve you in a threesome with another guy? Maybe she is just a pervert and you have to accept it.

Reply 16

Rakas21

Original post by Anonymous

I guess I just feel uncomfortable when she imagines me in one of those rapey situations that happen in some of her smut. Or when she gets ideas to try out some pretty weird things in bed.

I assume your using smut as a broad brush term rather than specifically urination and defecation.

At any rate your a lucky man. You don't have to actually go as far as faux rape (even if you were comfortable with it, women these days will try sue you in a decade) but by the sounds of it she is suggesting that you treat her as submissive to you and up the kink factor. There are a multitude of things you can try (a good Fetish website like Fetlife will list plenty of options).