How to friends

Original post by Anonymous

So I just moved in and realised that I have to make friends otherwise ill start feeling homesick a lot. Thing is I'm very socially awkward and don't know how to make friends lol. Tips?

Joining societies is usually a good way of meeting people. Don't be nervous, be proactive and talk to people. You can start with small talk like your name, where you are from, what subject you are doing, etc. A lot of society welcome events and activities are geared towards interacting with others and introducing yourself. You don't have anything to lose - of course you won't click with everyone you meet, but there will be people who you get on well with and will make great friends.

Reply 2

username4948098

2

Try cold approaching.

Reply 3

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

Joining societies is usually a good way of meeting people. Don't be nervous, be proactive and talk to people. You can start with small talk like your name, where you are from, what subject you are doing, etc. A lot of society welcome events and activities are geared towards interacting with others and introducing yourself. You don't have anything to lose - of course you won't click with everyone you meet, but there will be people who you get on well with and will make great friends.

To be honest, I don't have a problem introducing myself to people often it's more I don't know how to maintain conversation because I'm not a very overall interesting person at all.

Reply 4

OP

Original post by CertifiedFreak

Try cold approaching.

Cold like a cold cold summer :cool:

Reply 5

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

Joining societies is usually a good way of meeting people. Don't be nervous, be proactive and talk to people. You can start with small talk like your name, where you are from, what subject you are doing, etc. A lot of society welcome events and activities are geared towards interacting with others and introducing yourself. You don't have anything to lose - of course you won't click with everyone you meet, but there will be people who you get on well with and will make great friends.

I also noticed I make aquantances more than friends because of this, and its gonna really bother me because I have a close group of friends at home and really miss all the fun times we had together. :s-smilie:

Reply 6

Original post by Anonymous

I also noticed I make aquantances more than friends because of this, and its gonna really bother me because I have a close group of friends at home and really miss all the fun times we had together. :s-smilie:

How did you make friends with your group at home? I think a bond can develop from acquaintance to friendship - the more you see someone, the more you find out what you both have in common, etc. You can talk to people about their experiences at university, or moving away from the first time. If you have shared interests, you can talk about this. There are lots of new things to try at university, so you could also talk about this. I'm sure you are an interesting person, it just takes time for true friendships to form

Reply 7

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

How did you make friends with your group at home? I think a bond can develop from acquaintance to friendship - the more you see someone, the more you find out what you both have in common, etc. You can talk to people about their experiences at university, or moving away from the first time. If you have shared interests, you can talk about this. There are lots of new things to try at university, so you could also talk about this. I'm sure you are an interesting person, it just takes time for true friendships to form

Thank you, really appreciate your advice I will take it in consideration :smile:

Reply 8

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

How did you make friends with your group at home? I think a bond can develop from acquaintance to friendship - the more you see someone, the more you find out what you both have in common, etc. You can talk to people about their experiences at university, or moving away from the first time. If you have shared interests, you can talk about this. There are lots of new things to try at university, so you could also talk about this. I'm sure you are an interesting person, it just takes time for true friendships to form

I've only just moved in so I haven't gotten around to meeting new people yet, especially not this early as I was told everyone would be moving in around 14/15th where check in is. My floor is especially quite bare as its the one where people have pay more (I only had the choice since I booked late). Im only worried because of the fact that many people that I've added from Facebook messenger chats etc seem to have talked to each other and gotten along, while I haven't actually gotten round to knowing anyone yet beforegand because I think it's weird unless I find a 'right' time to approach :s-smilie:

Reply 9

Original post by Anonymous

I've only just moved in so I haven't gotten around to meeting new people yet, especially not this early as I was told everyone would be moving in around 14/15th where check in is. My floor is especially quite bare as its the one where people have pay more (I only had the choice since I booked late). Im only worried because of the fact that many people that I've added from Facebook messenger chats etc seem to have talked to each other and gotten along, while I haven't actually gotten round to knowing anyone yet beforegand because I think it's weird unless I find a 'right' time to approach :s-smilie:

As you mentioned, it is still quite early. Freshers Week is all about meeting new people, so you have plenty of time to make friends! You say there isn't a lot of people on your floor - you could visit other floors and introduce yourself to students who have moved in, or if you have a common area (like a canteen or common room) you could go there and talk to students. A lot of students will be eager to meet new people having started university so don't worry too much about approaching them at the "right" time.

Reply 10

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

As you mentioned, it is still quite early. Freshers Week is all about meeting new people, so you have plenty of time to make friends! You say there isn't a lot of people on your floor - you could visit other floors and introduce yourself to students who have moved in, or if you have a common area (like a canteen or common room) you could go there and talk to students. A lot of students will be eager to meet new people having started university so don't worry too much about approaching them at the "right" time.

ok thanks

i think i will try to meet new people at freshers and see if i can go with any of my flatmates because i really don't wanna go alone lol. Everyone's moving in on the 14th/15th anyway, so i think i will try to introduce myself then. Again, thanks for your advice :smile:

Reply 11

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

As you mentioned, it is still quite early. Freshers Week is all about meeting new people, so you have plenty of time to make friends! You say there isn't a lot of people on your floor - you could visit other floors and introduce yourself to students who have moved in, or if you have a common area (like a canteen or common room) you could go there and talk to students. A lot of students will be eager to meet new people having started university so don't worry too much about approaching them at the "right" time.

r u a first year btw?

Reply 12

Original post by Anonymous

r u a first year btw?

No, I finished uni many years ago but when I started uni, I was in a similar situation - feeling homesick, worried about making friends. It does get easier with time!

Reply 13

purplpeanut

9

Find someone who is like a social butterfly. Introduce yourself to them and just say that you're new and you moved here and you don't have many friends yet, chances are they'll latch right onto you. social butterflies love introducing other people, so once you've secured them as a friend, ask them if they know of anyone who might be interested in what you like to do. Watch as they light up and introduce you to a bajillion people. You're welcome.

Reply 14

OP

Original post by purplpeanut

Find someone who is like a social butterfly. Introduce yourself to them and just say that you're new and you moved here and you don't have many friends yet, chances are they'll latch right onto you. social butterflies love introducing other people, so once you've secured them as a friend, ask them if they know of anyone who might be interested in what you like to do. Watch as they light up and introduce you to a bajillion people. You're welcome.

Damn wish it was that easy, thing is I find it a bit weird introducing myself to a person who's more social than me because for some reason I feel intimidated, and because of that conversations never fun but I guess I could try at least. Lol

Reply 15

OP

Original post by cheesecakelove

No, I finished uni many years ago but when I started uni, I was in a similar situation - feeling homesick, worried about making friends. It does get easier with time!

Oh I see. Hopefully it will then. I talked to a few people online who's going the same uni and called some people back at home, so I feel alright at the moment, it just feels a bit lonely on my floor with no one here😂 I also ended up talking to a few people in my floor yesterday, however found they weren't my kind of people because I got the vibe they were mentally way older than me and it was a bit like... Couldn't relate😂 not that I'm against that, I'm just mentally very young.

Reply 16

OP

Original post by Anonymous

Oh I see. Hopefully it will then. I talked to a few people online who's going the same uni and called some people back at home, so I feel alright at the moment, it just feels a bit lonely on my floor with no one here😂 I also ended up talking to a few people in my floor yesterday, however found they weren't my kind of people because I got the vibe they were mentally way older than me and it was a bit like... Couldn't relate😂 not that I'm against that, I'm just mentally very young.

Sorry meant in my flat, not on the same floor

Reply 17

UniversityOfSunderland

Official Rep

14

Original post by Anonymous

So I just moved in and realised that I have to make friends otherwise ill start feeling homesick a lot. Thing is I'm very socially awkward and don't know how to make friends lol. Tips?

Ask if your housemates want to join you for a cuppa in the kitchen, bring some nice biscuits and job done :smile:

They'll be feeling the exact same way as you and are probably hoping that someone will reach out first. Ask them if they want to cook a meal together at some point and everyone can chip in a few pounds to do so. In my accommodation we started doing this during Freshers' and then it became a tradition that we'd do every week.

Immerse yourself in all the events and activities that Freshers' Week has to offer. Your SU should have put on a range of things to do to suit all interests, so you should be able to find people that you have some common ground with.
Also, attend your Freshers' Fayre, and join any clubs or societies that you have an interest in. Again this is a good way to make a group of friends that you share an interest with.

Personally, I found that I made my strongest connections with the people I lived with and those that were on the same society as me. Freshers' isn't the be all and end all. Join any online Freshers groups on social media and look out for ones that are for the course you're on too. This will enable you to reach out to your course mates and ask if they want to grab a coffee sometime.

One thing our SU offers is SU buddies, they put you in touch with a fellow student based on your interests and area of study and match you with someone that will help you make the most of your experience.
Maybe check our your SU to see if they offer something similar?

Try and not panic, the best friendships do happen naturally and make the most of the opportunities your uni provides to create new relationships.

Reply 18

rjckk

12

Oh. Are you boy or girl?
Which university are you in? What do you major in?

Reply 19