The Student Room Group

I’m tired of being single

I’m starting university soon and I’ve never had a boyfriend, I’ve never even kissed a boy, guys just don’t approach me and to be honest I don’t approach them either due to low self esteem. I always see people in relationships and they’re always happy and I know it’s not always like that but I feel really lonely being single I feel like I have no one, I just want one person I can love and spend time with and tell everything to. I don’t know how to find love either, I doubt online dating sites are the answer I don’t really know any guys through mutual friends either. I’m just tired of being by myself
Original post by Anonymous
I’m starting university soon and I’ve never had a boyfriend, I’ve never even kissed a boy, guys just don’t approach me and to be honest I don’t approach them either due to low self esteem. I always see people in relationships and they’re always happy and I know it’s not always like that but I feel really lonely being single I feel like I have no one, I just want one person I can love and spend time with and tell everything to. I don’t know how to find love either, I doubt online dating sites are the answer I don’t really know any guys through mutual friends either. I’m just tired of being by myself

Uni changes everything. A lot of people are in your situation and a lot of them are with people by the end of freshers even. Don’t worry you still have ages
Original post by Anonymous
I’m starting university soon and I’ve never had a boyfriend, I’ve never even kissed a boy, guys just don’t approach me and to be honest I don’t approach them either due to low self esteem. I always see people in relationships and they’re always happy and I know it’s not always like that but I feel really lonely being single I feel like I have no one, I just want one person I can love and spend time with and tell everything to. I don’t know how to find love either, I doubt online dating sites are the answer I don’t really know any guys through mutual friends either. I’m just tired of being by myself

there will always be guys willing to get to know you and see if you suit e.g. I am also currently single and happy to get to know you
Work as much as you can on your self esteem. Get professional help on this if you can. Read all the self help books on it that you can.

Your self esteem will naturally go up as you achieve things in life.

Getting to uni is an acheivement that you should be proud of, for starters. Well done and well deserved.

Sort out your self esteem and I'm confident that a feeling of happiness or contentment will descend upon you.
Then you should have the mindset that you are happy as a single person. And happy when you are in a relationship.

Your self esteem really is far more important to your happiness than whether you have a boyfriend or not.
Put most of your effort into what will make you happiest in life. Having sorted that out, you can then look into other things, like getting a boyfriend, if that hasn't already sorted itself out already.

BTW, for your first boyfriend, try to get one that will help build up your self esteem. There's a relatively high proportion of men that will drag your self esteem down. If you find yourself in a relationship with one, dump his negative backside before he does any damage. What you're looking for is a man that is happy enough with himself and happy enough and tolerant of the people around him. An "I'm OK, You're OK kind of guy."
Reply 4
Original post by SteveyStack
Uni changes everything. A lot of people are in your situation and a lot of them are with people by the end of freshers even. Don’t worry you still have ages


True, I’m hoping my situation changes at uni.

Original post by Dunnig Kruger
Work as much as you can on your self esteem. Get professional help on this if you can. Read all the self help books on it that you can.

Your self esteem will naturally go up as you achieve things in life.

Getting to uni is an acheivement that you should be proud of, for starters. Well done and well deserved.

Sort out your self esteem and I'm confident that a feeling of happiness or contentment will descend upon you.
Then you should have the mindset that you are happy as a single person. And happy when you are in a relationship.

Your self esteem really is far more important to your happiness than whether you have a boyfriend or not.
Put most of your effort into what will make you happiest in life. Having sorted that out, you can then look into other things, like getting a boyfriend, if that hasn't already sorted itself out already.

BTW, for your first boyfriend, try to get one that will help build up your self esteem. There's a relatively high proportion of men that will drag your self esteem down. If you find yourself in a relationship with one, dump his negative backside before he does any damage. What you're looking for is a man that is happy enough with himself and happy enough and tolerant of the people around him. An "I'm OK, You're OK kind of guy."

I used to have really bad self esteem issues however it has since massively improved, I have read self help books and really changed my outlook on life. Although my self esteem has improved it isn’t great and I am still working on it. I also think you’re right in saying I should be happy single - I am! :smile: but i can’t help but what a relationship I suppose seeing everyone around me all loved up just gets a bit lonely I guess
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
there will always be guys willing to get to know you and see if you suit e.g. I am also currently single and happy to get to know you

What’s your current situation like? In the past I have started to get to know someone who just came out of a relationship and it was a whole disaster
Original post by Anonymous
What’s your current situation like? In the past I have started to get to know someone who just came out of a relationship and it was a whole disaster

hey I haven't just come out of a relationship so I doubt that will be a problem for us haha
Original post by Anonymous
What’s your current situation like? In the past I have started to get to know someone who just came out of a relationship and it was a whole disaster

sorry to write it in two - I don't feel comfortable putting my situation out on a public forum but we could discuss privately :smile:
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
sorry to write it in two - I don't feel comfortable putting my situation out on a public forum but we could discuss privately :smile:

Sure, however we are both anonymous
:colondollar:
Original post by Anonymous
Sure, however we are both anonymous
:colondollar:

I give you two my blessings :colondollar:
Original post by Anonymous
Sure, however we are both anonymous
:colondollar:

Haha now this is a conundrum. Who is going to become non-anon? :colondollar:
Original post by Anonymous
Sure, however we are both anonymous
:colondollar:

if you go un-anon I will PM you and then you can delete this thread :wink:
i'm totally single and fully really to mingle
Original post by Anonymous
if you go un-anon I will PM you and then you can delete this thread :wink:

Sounds like a plan but how do I delete a thread :redface:
Original post by Anonymous
Sounds like a plan but how do I delete a thread :redface:

ah you can't. I am sorry! But you can delete your post - just press "edit" and then "delete" the message :smile: then nobody will see you un-anon message

I just tried it ... so it works! :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
I’m starting university soon and I’ve never had a boyfriend, I’ve never even kissed a boy, guys just don’t approach me and to be honest I don’t approach them either due to low self esteem. I always see people in relationships and they’re always happy and I know it’s not always like that but I feel really lonely being single I feel like I have no one, I just want one person I can love and spend time with and tell everything to. I don’t know how to find love either, I doubt online dating sites are the answer I don’t really know any guys through mutual friends either. I’m just tired of being by myself


Nothing to be ashamed of

Quick Reply