The Student Room Group

Getting over someone who you never dated

I’m acc the biggest loser ever! But literally last year I spoke to a guy for just over 2 months and we really hit it off and it was honestly great but then it sort of faded he’s now at uni not sure where tho but during the year I did see him around school but we pretended we didn’t know eachother. The reason why I think it faded is because of me basically I’ve never spoken to anyone because I obvs wasn’t gonna talk to someone in that way if I didn’t feel that way about them don’t wanna lead them on or anything but this guy was he first person acc really liked. Basically it’s been around 14 months and I’m still not over him and I haven’t seen him in 7 months at all. Tbh I’m not too sure what I’m holding on to because I keep thinking about scenarios of us seeing eachother again in the future. Is it weird to think that I lowkey feel like this is not over I’m going to see him again?! I just don’t know y I’m still not over him I’m pretty sure he’s forgotten about me although he did pop up to one of my pictures and said something nice then did make a convo and then now I don’t have him one social.
Don't beat yourself up about it. Catching feelings is natural. Why don't you try speaking to him again?
Reply 2
Sounds as if you love him a bit or at least have strong feelings of love and connection to him. Maybe just try to reconnect with him on a personal level. Some men have a time frame in their head as to what's acceptable in terms of when they should start falling in love with someone it's usually three months. However, there is no ''real'' time to feel like you care for someone. If he doesn't feel the same once you try to re connect with him I would suggest you slowly move on. You might want to try talking to another guy also because it eases so much pain when you have tried to over the original person you thought you loved.
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
I’m acc the biggest loser ever! But literally last year I spoke to a guy for just over 2 months and we really hit it off and it was honestly great but then it sort of faded he’s now at uni not sure where tho but during the year I did see him around school but we pretended we didn’t know eachother. The reason why I think it faded is because of me basically I’ve never spoken to anyone because I obvs wasn’t gonna talk to someone in that way if I didn’t feel that way about them don’t wanna lead them on or anything but this guy was he first person acc really liked. Basically it’s been around 14 months and I’m still not over him and I haven’t seen him in 7 months at all. Tbh I’m not too sure what I’m holding on to because I keep thinking about scenarios of us seeing eachother again in the future. Is it weird to think that I lowkey feel like this is not over I’m going to see him again?! I just don’t know y I’m still not over him I’m pretty sure he’s forgotten about me although he did pop up to one of my pictures and said something nice then did make a convo and then now I don’t have him one social.


Do you want to date this guy? Or do you want to move on with your life and find someone else? Have you had deep physical intimacy with someone yet?
Reply 4
Original post by mgi
Do you want to date this guy? Or do you want to move on with your life and find someone else? Have you had deep physical intimacy with someone yet?


Honestly I’m not sure! Thing is I’ve had guys trying to move to me but I always end up sorta wanting to go back to him or missing him but that’s crazy because we didn’t even date. Tbh I’m not sure if it’s the fact that we got on so well we were so similar and tbh he was jokes like it’s not just that I was physically attracted to him but it was also his personality everyone thought we were acc gonna make such a good couple but obvs didn’t quite work out. Tbh I’m not sure what I want 😂 just confused
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Honestly I’m not sure! Thing is I’ve had guys trying to move to me but I always end up sorta wanting to go back to him or missing him but that’s crazy because we didn’t even date. Tbh I’m not sure if it’s the fact that we got on so well we were so similar and tbh he was jokes like it’s not just that I was physically attracted to him but it was also his personality everyone thought we were acc gonna make such a good couple but obvs didn’t quite work out. Tbh I’m not sure what I want 😂 just confused


Do you actually fancy him? How do you feel at the thought of f...king him?
Reply 6
Original post by LenaBuk
Sounds as if you love him a bit or at least have strong feelings of love and connection to him. Maybe just try to reconnect with him on a personal level. Some men have a time frame in their head as to what's acceptable in terms of when they should start falling in love with someone it's usually three months. However, there is no ''real'' time to feel like you care for someone. If he doesn't feel the same once you try to re connect with him I would suggest you slowly move on. You might want to try talking to another guy also because it eases so much pain when you have tried to over the original person you thought you loved.


Like I’m not like that tho I dunno what it is but it takes a lot for me to acc like a person like that I get a lot of attention from boys but I’ve never been the type of person to entertain that sort of thing purely because education comes first for me but I dunno y I fell for this guy. Other guys have tried to talk to me but I just end up missing him more but I have no clue what I’m missing coz we weren’t even in a relationship it’s just the fact that we got on so well like we’re so similar and used to make eachother laugh. Ok I’m deffo screwed 😂😂 I refuse to say that I love him cos that just makes me the saddest person ever 😂😂
Original post by mgi
Do you actually fancy him? How do you feel at the thought of f...king him?


Urmmm like obvs a bit uncomfortable coz I’m not supposed to be doing that coz of my religion and stuff😂 but wouldn’t be opposed to it tbh I’ve never thought about ****ing him when we used to talk it was more of the cute couple things like hugs and holding hands and **** ygm
Original post by mgi
How do you feel at the thought of f...king him?

...kay
Reply 9
Original post by CCUupcake123
Urmmm like obvs a bit uncomfortable coz I’m not supposed to be doing that coz of my religion and stuff😂 but wouldn’t be opposed to it tbh I’ve never thought about ****ing him when we used to talk it was more of the cute couple things like hugs and holding hands and **** ygm

But you can't forget him. So why not contact him and start again and if he is still nice then you could go to the f...ing stage? Lots of religious single people are sexually experienced.
Reply 10
Original post by Bang Outta Order
...kay

You liked the blunt question then? It clarified the issue straightaway if you see the reply.
Me and my crush never dated but it has felt like we have because of how close we are and we've held hands before and he's told someone we were dating. He also calls me babe and love but he likes another girl so I have to get over him some how.
Original post by mgi
You liked the blunt question then? It clarified the issue straightaway if you see the reply.

it was random and rapey
Original post by Bang Outta Order
it was random and rapey


Listen yeah I’m not looking to f him😂😂
Reply 14
Original post by Bang Outta Order
it was random and rapey


I just love your style and choice of words! We need to get married!lol.
(edited 4 years ago)
Baby girllll. Honestly same situation here! And the thing is he had another girl there whilst me and him were talking. So trust me, just think about when you go to uni you won’t need a man Cos of all these fresh faces
Original post by mgi
I just love your style and choice of words! We need to get married!lol.


Erm
Reply 17
Original post by Anonymous
Like I’m not like that tho I dunno what it is but it takes a lot for me to acc like a person like that I get a lot of attention from boys but I’ve never been the type of person to entertain that sort of thing purely because education comes first for me but I dunno y I fell for this guy. Other guys have tried to talk to me but I just end up missing him more but I have no clue what I’m missing coz we weren’t even in a relationship it’s just the fact that we got on so well like we’re so similar and used to make eachother laugh. Ok I’m deffo screwed 😂😂 I refuse to say that I love him cos that just makes me the saddest person ever 😂😂

I understand since I feel that way about a person too. You are not supposed to choose you just know; and yes you can tell the difference.

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