The Student Room Group

Can someone please help me explain why this girl would change her stance?

This girl and I know each other for a while now, we get on well in real life but on the internet she would ignore my texts, even though I only ever asked her about assignments and stuff regarding college. Anyways I managed to get her number (asked her irl) and sent her a text about class which again she would ignore.

After a while I felt a bit disrespected and would completely blank her in real life when we see each other. You can tell she would look my way to say hi but I wouldn’t even give her eye contact. This continued for a few days, and one other time I felt like I overdid it because we were talking in a group and I was flirting with everyone in the room (mostly girls) without acknowledging her, and you can tell she was visibly upset. I felt bad, so the next day I greeted her and sent her a message saying that this is our last year in college and I don’t want you to have a bad impression of me, I wanted us to be talking and become friends etc. This time she called me on the phone and was really nice to me, saying that the reason she wouldn’t respond to me or any other guy she knows in college over text was that she has a boyfriend. I made sure I was understanding and told her no problem and that I would delete her number. All was over on a good note, right?

Well to my surprise she texted me out of nowhere a few days ago telling me that i’m a great person and that if I need anything for classes etc she would have no problem replying. All this after a few weeks ago we supposedly cleared the air and everything was cool and especially after she wouldn’t respond to my texts about class previously. Why would she suddenly be so open now?

Don’t worry i’m not deluded, she most likely hasn’t broken up with her bf and I haven’t even re-saved her number, but I asked a female friend and she told me that maybe she told her boyfriend and he was okay with us texting about class, which I find confusing. Why would he be suddenly be okay with her having my number and asking about class if he literally isn’t okay with anyone talking to her over text? I mean if he was initially worried that I would start the convo with questions about class and escalate from there, why would he stop worrying now? It’s just a strange situation imo. What do you think?
Reply 1
Ngl i haven't read much of that but even im so confused about that's

Seems a bit strange tbf unless she's gone behind his back and is secretly doing this.

Could be just her internal battle of wanting to get to know you but trying not to just incase her boyfriend finds out.

Either way id deffo be cautious with her, maybe just stick to face to face conversations for now
Are you by any chance hot? Attractive in anyway, charismatic? Seemly sweet and overwhelmingly kind? Got a good body build? Any other attractive personality about you ?

If you have any of those I'd understand as to why she'd change her stance... However if not then... Ask the Genie.
Original post by xozxexo
Ngl i haven't read much of that but even im so confused about that's

Seems a bit strange tbf unless she's gone behind his back and is secretly doing this.

Could be just her internal battle of wanting to get to know you but trying not to just incase her boyfriend finds out.

Either way id deffo be cautious with her, maybe just stick to face to face conversations for now


Wouldn’t it be even stranger if she went behind his back and is secretly doing this?
Original post by Toxic Vibes
Are you by any chance hot? Attractive in anyway, charismatic? Seemly sweet and overwhelmingly kind? Got a good body build? Any other attractive personality about you ?

If you have any of those I'd understand as to why she'd change her stance... However if not then... Ask the Genie.


I’m mildly cute I guess and yeah I’m overwhelmingly kind and sweet. I’m just confused as to why she’d change her mind. She wasn’t open to texting even about school related stuff, then we cleared things up and I deleted her number having already told her I would do so, but then a couple of weeks later she decides to text me out of the blue telling me that if I need anything for school she’d respond. Why the sudden change of mind lol
Original post by Highlygreat13
I’m mildly cute I guess and yeah I’m overwhelmingly kind and sweet. I’m just confused as to why she’d change her mind. She wasn’t open to texting even about school related stuff, then we cleared things up and I deleted her number having already told her I would do so, but then a couple of weeks later she decides to text me out of the blue telling me that if I need anything for school she’d respond. Why the sudden change of mind lol


I have many things to say here and I know you ain't a mind reader, but I'm sure you prolly know deep down why she changed her stance.

Cos if what I'm thinking is what you had thought of before then the likely chance is that she prolly likes you.. As a friend of course... I think... Well... Didn't want to be harsh but yeah... We'll leave it at that
Original post by Toxic Vibes
I have many things to say here and I know you ain't a mind reader, but I'm sure you prolly know deep down why she changed her stance.

Cos if what I'm thinking is what you had thought of before then the likely chance is that she prolly likes you.. As a friend of course... I think... Well... Didn't want to be harsh but yeah... We'll leave it at that


I know she likes me on a friendly level but it’s just that we’ve never really been friends in the first place. I don’t understand why she’s open to texting now when she wasn’t before that’s all
Original post by Highlygreat13
I know she likes me on a friendly level but it’s just that we’ve never really been friends in the first place. I don’t understand why she’s open to texting now when she wasn’t before that’s all


...

......................

Ok

Don't tell me you're really THIS dense?

She likes you, prolly regarded you as a possible candidate if she ever broke up with her boyfriend. That, or she actually thought of you as a friend, maybe her boyfriend had been controlling prior which lead her to prolly think you as an 'important' (should we say) male friend.

I dunno how other girl thinks, but as the indoor mice I am, I'd think that if a cute ass dude approached me and texted me regardless of what the situation was he's prolly interested.

Buuutttt then again, I'm leaning on the side of that she probably likes you... Like... Liking the brief attention that wasn't from her boyfriend?

Honey, dunno about you guys but the girls I know, including myself likes to gossip to my little buddies about drama.

Dunno... If this is making any sense, I'm sleep deprived and I'm trying to answer something where I can hardly see what the hell I'm writing.

If that girl was me the reasons would've been, ATTENTION, DRAMA, GOSSIP MATERIAL OF A CUTE BOY BUGGING ME DAILY, PLAYING HARD TO GET, CUTE BOY THAT LOOKS BETTER THAN CURRENT OVERPROTECTIVE BOYFRIEND, POTENTIAL DATING CANDIDATE, ERM... That's all I can think, fml brain shutting down...

Anyways prolly need advice from some other sane girls out there who had a better history of relationship record than me, maybe they know.
Reply 8
Original post by Highlygreat13
Wouldn’t it be even stranger if she went behind his back and is secretly doing this?


Well in a way yes. Altho I have friends who are with people who are like that so they so become secretive and start doing this behind their backs.

Unfortunately it happens and so I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case- her boyfriend doesn't like her talking to guys.

If my boyfriend tried to control who I spoke to and didn't like me talking to other guys and replying tp them I would tell him to go do once, and just carry on but not mention them.

Its toxic but actually very common these days unfortunately

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending