My girlfriend has changed the way she acts towards me

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Anonymous #1
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Me and my gf have been going out for about 9 months now and things have been going great but over the past few weeks since New Year really I've noticed that she's started acting differently towards me. For example when our relationship was in it's earlier stages and we went out for something to eat either with her family or with mine and I checked my phone she'd nudge me and tell me to put it away which I would do and now it's got to the stage where when we go out for something to eat even if it's just me and her I put my phone on silent, turn off the vibration and leave it in my pants pocket so it can't distract me. Whereas on the flip side my gf constantly checks her phone when were out. Even yesterday we went out for some tea, nothing fancy just pub food, she had her phone on the table and I was talking to her, her phone pinged and she picked it up looked at the screen and laughed so I just siad "what?" and she said "nothing, carry on" so I carried on talking whilst she stayed on her phone and when I finished she went "sorry I wasn't listening tell me again."

On top of this she's started becoming very dismissive of things I like and enjoy. For example we like going to the cinema together and go about once a week, there was a film on last week that she wanted to watch and she asked me to go with her. Even though it wasn't my type of film I agreed to go with her. Afterwards I asked her if she'd come and see a certain film with me because I want and watched her film and she said "I don't think so because I don't like those films and they're all rubbish" which felt a bit selfish to me because I'd given up over two hours to go and watch something she'd like.

I am feeling as though her attitude towards me is changing and starting to feel like our relationship is a bit one sided.
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Shishowbob
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Start looking for another girlfriend, she's going to dump you or cheat on you soon.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Shishowbob)
Start looking for another girlfriend, she's going to dump you or cheat on you soon.
I'm not sure whether you're joking or not but that isn't a real help
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Anonymous #1
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Just as a follow up to this more has happened this week. My gf's family invited me to go away on holiday with them in a few months to which I said yes. It is a sight seeing and a beach holiday, I was with my gf the other day and when I found out we where going to this certain place I said I'd like to go and see a certain thing and her response was "well you can do that on your own because I'll find that boring" and then a little while later I mentioned about something else about the holiday I'd like to do and again she just shot me down. A part of me is now thinking have I made the right decision agreeing and paying to go away with her?

And another example we saw each other yesterday after work, nothing fancy just went for a pub tea and then watched a film at home. I had hardly slept on Wednesday night because someone tried to get into our garden on Tuesday night so I was up all night at any little noise. I'll admit I looked worse for wear yesterday because I was so tired, I had bags under my eyes and I was constantly yawning but trying my best to hide it. Obviously my girlfriend picked up on this and I apologised and explained why and her response was "it's your own fault for checking." I thought she'd be a bit more understanding.

It just feels like over the last month or so she has totally changed her attitude towards me and I dont know what to do.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Shishowbob)
Start looking for another girlfriend, she's going to dump you or cheat on you soon.
I don't think this is far out OP.

Your partner seems incredibly dismissive of you and your interests. That's not right.
You need to sit her down and try and talk about it. She if there's anything bothering her. You, and no one else, deserves to be treated in the manner you're describing in your posts. It's time to set the record straight or call it quits.
I know it's tough, but you've got to look out for yourself. Sorry.
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Capitalist_Lamb
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In my opinion she seems to be a bit controlling. Not in the manor where she won't let you do things but as in she only wants to do things she likes and that's it, she wont even consider what you do for her. You should sit her down and speak to her about this as this isn't going to sort it's self out.
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coolcat12345
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Me and my gf have been going out for about 9 months now and things have been going great but over the past few weeks since New Year really I've noticed that she's started acting differently towards me. For example when our relationship was in it's earlier stages and we went out for something to eat either with her family or with mine and I checked my phone she'd nudge me and tell me to put it away which I would do and now it's got to the stage where when we go out for something to eat even if it's just me and her I put my phone on silent, turn off the vibration and leave it in my pants pocket so it can't distract me. Whereas on the flip side my gf constantly checks her phone when were out. Even yesterday we went out for some tea, nothing fancy just pub food, she had her phone on the table and I was talking to her, her phone pinged and she picked it up looked at the screen and laughed so I just siad "what?" and she said "nothing, carry on" so I carried on talking whilst she stayed on her phone and when I finished she went "sorry I wasn't listening tell me again."

On top of this she's started becoming very dismissive of things I like and enjoy. For example we like going to the cinema together and go about once a week, there was a film on last week that she wanted to watch and she asked me to go with her. Even though it wasn't my type of film I agreed to go with her. Afterwards I asked her if she'd come and see a certain film with me because I want and watched her film and she said "I don't think so because I don't like those films and they're all rubbish" which felt a bit selfish to me because I'd given up over two hours to go and watch something she'd like.

I am feeling as though her attitude towards me is changing and starting to feel like our relationship is a bit one sided.
listen, my brother, just ask her if she even likes you, if she lies, dump her and go on her family holiday anyway 'cause u paid. you will know she lies because she will have shifty eyes and be dismissive and say "OF course I like you, don't be silly!"
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sinfonietta
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Just as a follow up to this more has happened this week. My gf's family invited me to go away on holiday with them in a few months to which I said yes. It is a sight seeing and a beach holiday, I was with my gf the other day and when I found out we where going to this certain place I said I'd like to go and see a certain thing and her response was "well you can do that on your own because I'll find that boring" and then a little while later I mentioned about something else about the holiday I'd like to do and again she just shot me down. A part of me is now thinking have I made the right decision agreeing and paying to go away with her?

And another example we saw each other yesterday after work, nothing fancy just went for a pub tea and then watched a film at home. I had hardly slept on Wednesday night because someone tried to get into our garden on Tuesday night so I was up all night at any little noise. I'll admit I looked worse for wear yesterday because I was so tired, I had bags under my eyes and I was constantly yawning but trying my best to hide it. Obviously my girlfriend picked up on this and I apologised and explained why and her response was "it's your own fault for checking." I thought she'd be a bit more understanding.

It just feels like over the last month or so she has totally changed her attitude towards me and I dont know what to do.
Sounds like she's lost interest in being with you. She may not even be aware of this herself yet.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I don't think this is far out OP.

Your partner seems incredibly dismissive of you and your interests.
I think you may have hit the nail on the head there. For example we go to the cinema quite a lot as we have monthly passes, a few weeks ago there was a certain film she wanted to see and kept saying how she had no one to go with so I went with her even though it really wasn't my type of film, sat and wasted two and a half hours of my weekend and then once it had finished I pretended I liked it even though I really didn't. Fast forward to a few days ago and something came on telly about the new James Bond film (they are my favourite films) and I just made a little comment saying "I'm so hyped for that" and she replied with "well you can go and watch that and your own because I find them crap." Stuff like that is getting to me lately.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I think you may have hit the nail on the head there. For example we go to the cinema quite a lot as we have monthly passes, a few weeks ago there was a certain film she wanted to see and kept saying how she had no one to go with so I went with her even though it really wasn't my type of film, sat and wasted two and a half hours of my weekend and then once it had finished I pretended I liked it even though I really didn't. Fast forward to a few days ago and something came on telly about the new James Bond film (they are my favourite films) and I just made a little comment saying "I'm so hyped for that" and she replied with "well you can go and watch that and your own because I find them crap." Stuff like that is getting to me lately.
So what's your plan?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So what's your plan?
I'm going to have to sit down and talk to her about how I feel.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm going to have to sit down and talk to her about how I feel.
I hope it turns out in your favour in the long run.

If you need any advice, feel free to keep us updated.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I hope it turns out in your favour in the long run.

If you need any advice, feel free to keep us updated.
I hope it does too but at the moment I’m not confident. It’s her birthday on Tuesday and I’m taking her out for a nice meal tomorrow and she’s just being very cold towards me.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I hope it does too but at the moment I’m not confident. It’s her birthday on Tuesday and I’m taking her out for a nice meal tomorrow and she’s just being very cold towards me.
If you look out for your best interests, I'm sure things will be. I know the haze too, I'm sorry.
That seems very unjust. You're being selfless and she's not reacting.
You don't have any obligation to wait till afterwards or treat her, as much as she may claim that it's you being selfish. Drawing it out may cause yourself more hurt.
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