The Student Room Group
Uni students - Complete our survey >>
Uni students - Complete our survey >>
Uni students - Complete our survey >>

gambling addict dad + son going to uni

Hi guys,

I am planning to go to university this September. However I have a bit of a problem with the process as my dad is in a huge debt because of what he did. I don't know what to do it feels sad and awkward and depressing to ask for his financial details so that I can apply for student loans. His English isn't very good so I have to do the application by myself. So far I can only give my mum's details but Student Finance wants the details of both parents. My dad left his job recently too so I don't even know if he has his payslips. Please can someone give me advice on how I should handle this.

Thank you!

EDIT: this is not a troll post btw, I'm being serious
(edited 4 years ago)
You haven't said why exactly you can't give/ask for his details.
Original post by NoNickname
You haven't said why exactly you can't give/ask for his details.


he gets very violent and emotional whenever we talk about the debt or money in general. I'm just scared to ask him.
Original post by iiiice-kreem-man
he gets very violent and emotional whenever we talk about the debt or money in general. I'm just scared to ask him.

Wow, I don't even know what to say.
Original post by iiiice-kreem-man
Hi guys,

I am planning to go to university this September. However I have a bit of a problem with the process as my dad is in a huge debt because of what he did. I don't know what to do it feels sad and awkward and depressing to ask for his financial details so that I can apply for student loans. His English isn't very good so I have to do the application by myself. So far I can only give my mum's details but Student Finance wants the details of both parents. My dad left his job recently too so I don't even know if he has his payslips. Please can someone give me advice on how I should handle this.

Thank you!

EDIT: this is not a troll post btw, I'm being serious

Hi

I understand how this may be daunting, but SF just need to know his earnings, not if he has any outgoings etc, the checks that they do only confirm that the income declared is correct.
Original post by Shirohige
Hi

I understand how this may be daunting, but SF just need to know his earnings, not if he has any outgoings etc, the checks that they do only confirm that the income declared is correct.


true... ..I'll ask again after a while, when things have hopefully calmed down. I'm just scared he might do something, even though he's my dad

thanks
(edited 4 years ago)
update:
he came home taking more loans using my mum as a guarantor without her consent (somehow). He got violent after confronting him again and I couldn't control myself and punched him several times on the head. Half of me regrets what I did but the other feels like he f***ing deserves it. He then shouted at me saying he'll cut ties and kick me out. Now that I've calmed down I think I just made matters worse. I really am lost and don't know what to do.
Original post by iiiice-kreem-man
update:
he came home taking more loans using my mum as a guarantor without her consent (somehow). He got violent after confronting him again and I couldn't control myself and punched him several times on the head. Half of me regrets what I did but the other feels like he f***ing deserves it. He then shouted at me saying he'll cut ties and kick me out. Now that I've calmed down I think I just made matters worse. I really am lost and don't know what to do.

You need to talk to your mum, this is just going to cause so much strain on all of you, I think for you guys it'd be best to get away from him even if that means your parents split up. Unless he can change and be helped. You could try to get him on debt and gambling helplines I guess or groups. I'm glad you stood up for yourself though, it shows him that you are not going to let yourself be under him.

Also talk to student finance about being unable to get the deets
(edited 4 years ago)

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you