The Student Room Group

My boyfriend wished coronavirus on me and told me to die because

Scroll to see replies

Original post by Oxford Mum
PRSOM Grey wolf


What?
Original post by Bookworm04
We had an argument because I was telling him what his friend had said about him and he didn’t believe me and then he kept saying I was a liar so I snapped and said “Is he your dad?” Because he was just making it out like this guy would never do anything bad and that his judgment is the best but his judgement about me is I’m a liar so his judgement is obviously **** and then I got angry and said that. I didn’t even mean it in an insulting way and he got so pissed off and told me to delete his number and wished death on me and told me to get coronavirus. All that after a six year relationship! Can you believe it? He hasn’t called me in two days and I still apologised for saying that if it “hurt his feelings.” I thought maybe he felt angry because his father died three years ago but I wasn’t even swearing at his father, he actually swore at my family.

He is often mean to me and in three days he probably told me to die about seven times.

Did I do something really bad here? I need perspective. Please tell me was I wrong?

Also I confided in him and told him most of my insecurities because he always insisted I tell him every small detail of my life which made me uncomfortable and then he used my weakness against me and called me an “insecure ****.”

No matter what anyone says to me, no matter whatever the provocation, I would not wish Coronavirus on anyone.

It is impossible to carry on with someone when they hate you this much.

When we are actually allowed out again, take the opportunity to find someone else.
Original post by Anonymous
are you the bf?? xDDD


Why would you think I’m the bf?
Original post by Greywolftwo
Why would you think I’m the bf?

Of course you are not the bf!
Original post by Bang Outta Order
...Oh please. I said what I said. This only happened because of the girl. And how dare she drag his name through the mud saying he does x,y,z so the crowd can lean towards her. Nasty.


You are potentially stopping someone from leaving a toxic relationship with your ridiculous conclusions. Stop trolling, or if you seriously think that, then you're outing yourself as someone who thinks like an abuser.
Original post by Oxford Mum
Of course you are not the bf!


No idea why they said that
Original post by OddOnes
You are potentially stopping someone from leaving a toxic relationship with your ridiculous conclusions. Stop trolling, or if you seriously think that, then you're outing yourself as someone who thinks like an abuser.


I mean @Bang Outta Order probably will be 🤷*♂️
Original post by Bang Outta Order
The boyfriend is 100% innocent. She's detailing gossip about him firstly.....who wants to hear negativity!? Then, she mentions his dead father to guilt him. Nasty nasty nasty. Kudos to the boyfriend for putting up with that for six years. He won by pulling a legger.


Really?
Original post by Bookworm04
We had an argument because I was telling him what his friend had said about him and he didn’t believe me and then he kept saying I was a liar so I snapped and said “Is he your dad?” Because he was just making it out like this guy would never do anything bad and that his judgment is the best but his judgement about me is I’m a liar so his judgement is obviously **** and then I got angry and said that. I didn’t even mean it in an insulting way and he got so pissed off and told me to delete his number and wished death on me and told me to get coronavirus. All that after a six year relationship! Can you believe it? He hasn’t called me in two days and I still apologised for saying that if it “hurt his feelings.” I thought maybe he felt angry because his father died three years ago but I wasn’t even swearing at his father, he actually swore at my family.

He is often mean to me and in three days he probably told me to die about seven times.

Did I do something really bad here? I need perspective. Please tell me was I wrong?

Also I confided in him and told him most of my insecurities because he always insisted I tell him every small detail of my life which made me uncomfortable and then he used my weakness against me and called me an “insecure ****.”

You need to teach him the basic pathology of the situation: that it is highly unlikely that, were you to contract coronavirus, you would die as a young person without underlying health conditions, so it's a poor choice of death wish.

Then dump his sorry little ass, the objectionable tosser. :smile:
Original post by Bookworm04
We had an argument because I was telling him what his friend had said about him and he didn’t believe me and then he kept saying I was a liar so I snapped and said “Is he your dad?” Because he was just making it out like this guy would never do anything bad and that his judgment is the best but his judgement about me is I’m a liar so his judgement is obviously **** and then I got angry and said that. I didn’t even mean it in an insulting way and he got so pissed off and told me to delete his number and wished death on me and told me to get coronavirus. All that after a six year relationship! Can you believe it? He hasn’t called me in two days and I still apologised for saying that if it “hurt his feelings.” I thought maybe he felt angry because his father died three years ago but I wasn’t even swearing at his father, he actually swore at my family.

He is often mean to me and in three days he probably told me to die about seven times.

Did I do something really bad here? I need perspective. Please tell me was I wrong?

Also I confided in him and told him most of my insecurities because he always insisted I tell him every small detail of my life which made me uncomfortable and then he used my weakness against me and called me an “insecure ****.”

It was a lover's tiff. People say all sorts of stuff in the heat of the moment.

The lack of belief from him was annoying. It's a common thing for people to do when presented with information that challenges their view of the world. Confirmation bias is very much a real thing.

The escalation of the argument was also very much a human thing to happen. Nobody acts and speaks with the patience of a saint at all times. Nobody's perfect.

Him being in a big strop as a result of this argument is also human. Although if he were more compatible in how he resolves conflict with you, he would have apologised and moved on and treated the argument as water under the bridge by now.

Before this argument, how were things between the 2 of you? I suspect there may be some major flaw in your relationship and this argument has been a way for your boyfriend to vent his feelings. Like a volcano erupting for several days. The main reason for the eruption is not the earthquake that triggered it. The main reason was the underlying geology and the amount of magma pressure on the crust of the volcano.

It's the whole underlying geology of your relationship that determines if it's worth the 2 of you patching things up and moving on together or not.

If you do split up with him, it's not the end of the world by any means. There are plenty more fish in the sea. And you do come across as an honest, sensitive, well enough adjusted person with a good amount of empathy.
Original post by OddOnes
You are potentially stopping someone from leaving a toxic relationship with your ridiculous conclusions. Stop trolling, or if you seriously think that, then you're outing yourself as someone who thinks like an abuser.

I'm typing this on my phone, in no way am I doing anything...I'm commenting on his reaction to her mentioning his dead dad, not commenting on the entire dynamic of their relationship...which neither of us know about.
And his reaction is warranted. She antagonised someone who was admittedly annoyed by her negative gossip.


Op posted this over a day ago/over 24 hours ago, but edited in the convenient bit about him being an abuser THIRTEEN hours after posting so it seems like an inflammatory reach to look innocent.
Original post by Greywolftwo
Really?

Yes?
Original post by mgi
No , this is nonsense. He is toxic! Whatever happened to grown ass taking responsibility for his nasty mean comments to his gf of 6 years? He has issues within himself about his dad which are not her fault. He needs bereavement counselling to help him manage himself and his life. Meanwhile, she is much better off without his mean bullying behaviour towards her and her family which you somehow failed to mention!


Yes because "BIG STRONG MAN" should be able to move on and not be bothered when the partner he puts his trust in brings up the man who raised him dying. If I said to him something about his dad dying (which I wouldn't) he wouldn't care as I am no-one to him. But when your partner, the one you love, snaps at you about your father it would most likely be different.

Why is the boyfriend the one being nasty? We have one side of a story here, you can't make a full picture with a one-sided view, maybe he told her that she shouldn't bring up things around his farther in the past. We don't know how his farther past and how it affected him. Why is he toxic but she not. They both snapped at each other and like you said about him taking responsibility for what he said she should also.

In my opinion, they are both in the wrong, not just the boy. She shouldn't have snapped at him and he shouldn't have snapped back. But to call them toxic is a bit far. People argue and say things they don't mean all the time when their emotions get the better of them. Just because you have a fall out with your mum/dad doesn't mean you just forget them and move on, you talk it out and explain to each other how you felt.

OP - You both need to give each other some time and then you need to talk it out together
Might we agree that there's a difference between having an argument and wishing death on your partner repeatedly?
Original post by Admit-One
Might we agree that there's a difference between having an argument and wishing death on your partner repeatedly?

Like I said. People say things they don't mean when they are in an emotional situation. I can undoubtedly say (obviously not 100% but close) that he doesn't want her to die, he said it because he is going through a difficult time and felt betrayed by the person he placed his trust in. Yes, he shouldn't have said it but did he mean it, I don't think so.

What I was saying above is that if you told me you wished I died I would not care. You are no-one to me. However, if my partner wished death on me then I would feel pain there as they are the one I have placed my trust in. Yes, what he said was wrong, and what she said was wrong too, but they most likely didn't mean any of what they said.
Original post by Halfeti Rose
yes boys r too innocent always


yes females r too innocent always



Too many bored kids playing around on here nowadays
Original post by Capitalist_Lamb
Yes because "BIG STRONG MAN" should be able to move on and not be bothered when the partner he puts his trust in brings up the man who raised him dying. If I said to him something about his dad dying (which I wouldn't) he wouldn't care as I am no-one to him. But when your partner, the one you love, snaps at you about your father it would most likely be different.

Why is the boyfriend the one being nasty? We have one side of a story here, you can't make a full picture with a one-sided view, maybe he told her that she shouldn't bring up things around his farther in the past. We don't know how his farther past and how it affected him. Why is he toxic but she not. They both snapped at each other and like you said about him taking responsibility for what he said she should also.

In my opinion, they are both in the wrong, not just the boy. She shouldn't have snapped at him and he shouldn't have snapped back. But to call them toxic is a bit far. People argue and say things they don't mean all the time when their emotions get the better of them. Just because you have a fall out with your mum/dad doesn't mean you just forget them and move on, you talk it out and explain to each other how you felt.

OP - You both need to give each other some time and then you need to talk it out together

How dare you speak sense on tsr!? 😱
Original post by Capitalist_Lamb
Yes because "BIG STRONG MAN" should be able to move on and not be bothered when the partner he puts his trust in brings up the man who raised him dying. If I said to him something about his dad dying (which I wouldn't) he wouldn't care as I am no-one to him. But when your partner, the one you love, snaps at you about your father it would most likely be different.

Why is the boyfriend the one being nasty? We have one side of a story here, you can't make a full picture with a one-sided view, maybe he told her that she shouldn't bring up things around his farther in the past. We don't know how his farther past and how it affected him. Why is he toxic but she not. They both snapped at each other and like you said about him taking responsibility for what he said she should also.

In my opinion, they are both in the wrong, not just the boy. She shouldn't have snapped at him and he shouldn't have snapped back. But to call them toxic is a bit far. People argue and say things they don't mean all the time when their emotions get the better of them. Just because you have a fall out with your mum/dad doesn't mean you just forget them and move on, you talk it out and explain to each other how you felt.

OP - You both need to give each other some time and then you need to talk it out together


I think you can't get any clearer than this post, this sums up everything in an unbiased way and actually looks at the facts not stereotypes or double standards
Original post by Bang Outta Order
yes females r too innocent always



Too many bored kids playing around on here nowadays

:s-smilie:
Original post by Bookworm04
We had an argument because I was telling him what his friend had said about him and he didn’t believe me and then he kept saying I was a liar so I snapped and said “Is he your dad?” Because he was just making it out like this guy would never do anything bad and that his judgment is the best but his judgement about me is I’m a liar so his judgement is obviously **** and then I got angry and said that. I didn’t even mean it in an insulting way and he got so pissed off and told me to delete his number and wished death on me and told me to get coronavirus. All that after a six year relationship! Can you believe it? He hasn’t called me in two days and I still apologised for saying that if it “hurt his feelings.” I thought maybe he felt angry because his father died three years ago but I wasn’t even swearing at his father, he actually swore at my family.

He is often mean to me and in three days he probably told me to die about seven times.

Did I do something really bad here? I need perspective. Please tell me was I wrong?

Also I confided in him and told him most of my insecurities because he always insisted I tell him every small detail of my life which made me uncomfortable and then he used my weakness against me and called me an “insecure ****.”


Hey I have faced such scenario before. All you need is to stop sharing your each and everything with him. that makes him to dominate you and blackmail you keeping you as his pet. Whatever happened, just chuck it. from today, if you are reading this... dont share anything with him and make him share his stuffs with you, then you will understand that he is not just selfish but doesnt need you at all.
Original post by JOSHKOIKKARA
Hey I have faced such scenario before. All you need is to stop sharing your each and everything with him. that makes him to dominate you and blackmail you keeping you as his pet. Whatever happened, just chuck it. from today, if you are reading this... dont share anything with him and make him share his stuffs with you, then you will understand that he is not just selfish but doesnt need you at all.

I'm just saying with your logic, the fact that she brought up his father's death first after he presumably confided in her, means that she is the selfish one, surely, please tell me If I'm wrong?

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending