Coming out- Pansexual

I am about to text my friend that I am Pan. This is what I am about to text can you give me your opinions on if its good and hope to improve it.

"I need to tell you something and you can't tell anyone else until I am ready, But I am Pansexual. It means that I like both genders and those who are Trans or Non Binary. I have been feeling this way for a while and needed to tell someone. I am still the same person and I hope you respect that."

Edit, I am dyslexic so i am sorry for any spelling or punctuation mistakes.

Reply 1

threeportdrift

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Original post by Soph_Studying

Why do you think this needs saying? I'm not suggesting it doesn't, but a text doesn't seem a very natural way.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Is pansexual when you’re attracted to pans?

Reply 3

Soph_Studying

Original post by threeportdrift

Why do you think this needs saying? I'm not suggesting it doesn't, but a text doesn't seem a very natural way.

I really need to tell someone and cuz of Covid19 i can see them in person and i dont want to call because i would chicken out

Reply 4

threeportdrift

Careers Forum Helper

Original post by Soph_Studying

I really need to tell someone and cuz of Covid19 i can see them in person and i dont want to call because i would chicken out

That doesn't make any sense, why does Covid make any difference? Why do you need to make an announcement of this? The Covid situation means you can't act on any of your feelings, even if you've got someone lined up. So there's no urgency to tell anyone anything.

Reply 5

Soph_Studying

Original post by threeportdrift

I am not trying to make an announcement i am trying to tell a friend something personal about me, so I can have someone I trust to confide in. I also feel like I need someone to know and i am not ready to tell my parents.

Reply 6

threeportdrift

Careers Forum Helper

Original post by Soph_Studying

But you can't have proper,confidential discussions with someone by text. This is important and personal, it needs to be done face-to-face, at the right time and in the right place. You need to be able to judge your friends reaction and they need to be able to judge yours - that can't happen by text.

If you feel you need to talk to someone, have you tried a helpline, just until the lockdown is over?

Reply 7

Anonymous #2

This is something that’s really nobody’s business but yours and the person you’re in a relationship with. You’re declaring that you like everything with a pulse and two legs but it does not make any material difference if you’re not in a relationship. The relationship you eventually settle on or the next relationship you get into is the only one that matters so why even bother? I heard this from someone once and it basically amounted to him trying to get validation for being a player. He eventually settled into a long term relationship with a guy and he doesn’t wear pansexuality as a label anymore because it doesn’t matter. Likewise I like both men and women but I’m also married to a guy so my sexuality isn’t really something I need to label or make a big song and dance about.
Maybe stop trying to brand or categorise yourself and just get on with your life and let yourself love who you love. Or is it just that you’re not into ordinary people? Are you attracted to people who dress in a certain way or have certain colour hair etc? If you have a type, fair enough but since when was having a type cause for an announcement or coming out?

Reply 8

Foxehh

Coming out is not something that needs to be done face to face. It is different for everyone, if text is how you want to go about it then theres nothing wrong with that :smile:

You could say what you've already typed out or a simple "I think Im pansexual" with a follow up about not having told anyone and whatnot also works.

edit- oh rats, 8 month thread!

(edited 3 years ago)

Reply 9

Anonymous #3

I agree with lovely mr fox you do you ❤️