The Student Room Group

Scroll to see replies

Original post by Anonymous
For me it’s important that I’m sexually attracted to the person I’m in a relationship with and I’ve personally never been sexually attracted to guys of colour. I can appreciate if they’re good looking but I have never “fancied” someone of colour as they just aren’t my type. I’ve been told that makes me racist but surely I can’t force myself to be attracted to people?!


No, as long as you also get to know the persons personality as well as their looks.
Reply 21
It doesn't make you racist - it just means you aren't sexually attracted to them. I'm not sexually attracted to penguins, but I still think they are fab!

People aren't born racist, it is something that is learned. Sexually attraction is not learned. By saying that people who are only attracted to members of their own race are racist, you are saying that sexual attraction is learned. Do you know who else thinks that sexual attraction is learned? Those people who run gay conversion camps.
(edited 4 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
get over it?? sorry but as someone who’s been used for my skin colour by men who found me “exotic” and completely disregarded every other aspect of myself that makes me unique, and knowing so many other men and women of colour who have experienced the same, i can’t just “get over it”. you can’t tell someone what they can and can’t be offended by????? please educate yourself & be conscious and sensitive of other people’s feelings, don’t invalidate them, especially if you have no experience of it yourself.

Their attraction to you was not wrong, it was their belief that they could mistreat you that was wrong. If they believed that your skin colour made it ok to mistreat you then they are racist due to that fact, not the attraction itself.
Original post by Anonymous
get over it?? sorry but as someone who’s been used for my skin colour by men who found me “exotic” and completely disregarded every other aspect of myself that makes me unique, and knowing so many other men and women of colour who have experienced the same, i can’t just “get over it”. you can’t tell someone what they can and can’t be offended by????? please educate yourself & be conscious and sensitive of other people’s feelings, don’t invalidate them, especially if you have no experience of it yourself.

You’re not wrong at all. People who have no real experience of it will tell you to “get over it” race fetishisation is real and it is absolutely disgusting.


I’ve been told “ooh I like black girls because of their fat ass and sassy attitude. I need me some of dat” it is pathetic
Original post by londonmyst
No.
It is a sexual preference.
Racism is racial hatred.

I think labelling a preference as being racist is somewhat trivialising racism. Being a racist is due to ignorance and/ or choosing to follow such beliefs whereas you can't choose who you're attracted to. There's people of all ethnicities I find attractive but being bisexual I've noticed a definite difference in leaning/ preference between genders. A lot of the guys I find good looking are white with blond or light hair but I'm quite attracted to black women. I know that's not due to any conscious decision by me, it's just how I am.
Original post by Anonymous
For me it’s important that I’m sexually attracted to the person I’m in a relationship with and I’ve personally never been sexually attracted to guys of colour. I can appreciate if they’re good looking but I have never “fancied” someone of colour as they just aren’t my type. I’ve been told that makes me racist but surely I can’t force myself to be attracted to people?!

It depends.

If you generally don't find people of "X" background attractive; or you haven't yet met someone that you are attracted, but are open to that possibility (however remote that may be) then, as far as I'm concerned, that's a genuine preference.

On the other hand, if you're flatly refusing to ever entertain that possibility purely because they are of "X" race, or openly stating that it's wrong for "X" and "Y" races to mix, then that is racist IMHO. It's a more sociably acceptable form of racism, but it's still racism. nonetheless. Although it's a racist attribute, I don't think it automatically makes the individual racist per se... in much the same way that just because someone may like a salad sandwich it doesn't necessarily mean they're a vegetarian.
wouldn’t say it’s racist but people calling it ‘preference’ is weird lol, preference is when you like apples more than oranges but you’re still open to eat an orange. there’s a difference between preferring something and blatantly not liking something ??
No.
Original post by MoonlightRain
You’re not wrong at all. People who have no real experience of it will tell you to “get over it” race fetishisation is real and it is absolutely disgusting.


I’ve been told “ooh I like black girls because of their fat ass and sassy attitude. I need me some of dat” it is pathetic


No real experience of it?? I am black/mixed myself. Men that go for me often like mixed, black or exotic looking women. I take it as a good thing that they see the beauty in my colour. They often mention how white women don't have my figure or my lips, it's very complimentary and not disrespectful. Stop going for those roadmen and go for decent guys if you want to be treated well sweetie.
As a non-white guy, I am only attracted to white women and do not have colored women attractive so I wouldn't judge you.
Original post by Anonymous
As a non-white guy, I am only attracted to white women and do not have colored women attractive so I wouldn't judge you.

**find
It's not but you just find that most people who say they don't like people of colour or could never be attracted to them always end up having racist undertones as to why. E.g. conceptions of bringing them to your parents home, not liking certain mannerisms that you only attach to certain people of colour, certain stereotypical tropes like if even one of these pop up as to why you wouldn't date them or anything then yeah it's racist but it goes the other way like when white people only like a certain person of colour like black guys. The idea that a black guy ruins a girls innocence, to "annoy" your parents, because of sexual desires, fetishising and demonising mostly. So I'd just say be aware
Not at all! I love white women, they have such beautiful, milky-white feet! Their soles look delicious. :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
It's not but you just find that most people who say they don't like people of colour or could never be attracted to them always end up having racist undertones as to why. E.g. conceptions of bringing them to your parents home, not liking certain mannerisms that you only attach to certain people of colour, certain stereotypical tropes like if even one of these pop up as to why you wouldn't date them or anything then yeah it's racist but it goes the other way like when white people only like a certain person of colour like black guys. The idea that a black guy ruins a girls innocence, to "annoy" your parents, because of sexual desires, fetishising and demonising mostly. So I'd just say be aware

I think OP is a women of colour
I'm black and I've never been attracted to anybody else who is black. We all have preferences.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm black and I've never been attracted to anybody else who is black. We all have preferences.

are you a male or female?
Original post by Anonymous
are you a male or female?

Female
Yes its racist. To think you'll never be attracted to any black person regardless of how they look or their personality is racist.
I don't think so lol. All my friends have racial prefences (my white friend said she'd only marry a white guy because that's her prefence, my desi friend said she's only marry a brown boy vice versa. - I seem to be the only one who just goes for personality but either is fine.
No, you aren’t

Latest

Trending

Trending