I will keep this as concise as I can – sorry in advance, but I am feeling so inane here.
I started this job in January. I am a graduate, and this is a minimum wage job. I work for a particular doctor on a particular clinic doing admin/cashing up (it’s private). I am based in two places: the office and the clinic. I spend most my time at the clinic. On more than one occasion, my manager looks for problems. Most people strongly dislike her as she’s rude and nasty.
Many things have occurred that have upset me but they consumed me to the point that I was like a boiling kettle – I exploded. I exploded in the sense that I would cry myself to sleep at night… this then turned into crying at the bus stop after work, and then I started to cry in front of patients. I felt/feel intense sadness. Like, a really sad and trapped feeling.
Finally, six weeks of this building up, I spoke to the doctor I work with. I started to cry, I feel so embarrassed still but… I just started to cry in his room. I am suffering anxiety and stress, I am on beta blockers again. I felt so much better speaking to the doctor but it didn’t change the situation because I just wanted him aware of this feeling of dread and sadness.
Today, again… she sent me an extremely passive aggressive e-mail in regards to the smallest thing. My clinic happens alongside other clinics, so we have our own everything, i.e. card machine, folders, notes, payment style, etc. I spoke to the secretary for stamps to send a letter, she said we have our own and therefore I cannot have theirs.
I emailed my team and manager to find out how to send the letter if I had no stamps here, I was sent this in a nutshell: ‘can I ask why you are emailing myself and the team about this when you can speak to the practise manager? I have spoken to her and she said you can use hers’… ‘also, you need to form a relationship with her because I have noticed you keep bypassing her, she is your line manager when I am not there.’ This is far less harsh than it came across. I cannot believe she is telling me that I keep bypassing when I have a set of things to do, and just get on with it – it’s the same thing every day, just different patients. Furthermore, when I mention things to the practise manager, she always tells me to speak my line manager and fobs me off.
I am sick of this. I feel bullied. I feel sadness. I do not want to leave this job but it’s at the point I am too scared to check her texts/e-mails because of what rubbish she spouts. Should I speak to her boss? Should I take it to H.R.? Or not bother as I will be leaving come Summer (if I make it to then)?
This is one situation of many.