The Student Room Group

What is a platonic relationship in marriage?

Would a guy want a platonic relationship with a woman?

What are the benefits and drawbacks?
By platonic you mean no love and no sex?

I mean that's basically friendship?
Original post by Anonymous
Would a guy want a platonic relationship with a woman?

What are the benefits and drawbacks?

Well, I think you know the drawbacks, don't you?
Reply 3
Original post by Issakatie
By platonic you mean no love and no sex?

I mean that's basically friendship?

Do you think someone you marry would settle and agree with just a platonic relationship? Or would it end badly?
If it's what you're looking for then you're best off looking into asexual dating apps. People who are using these sites are typically looking for something similar.
Original post by Anonymous
Do you think someone you marry would settle and agree with just a platonic relationship? Or would it end badly?


Well probably not no, nearly all men (and women tbh) would expect and want sex from a relationship or marriage.
Original post by Anonymous
Would a guy want a platonic relationship with a woman?

What are the benefits and drawbacks?


Platonic love is a type of love, or close relationship, that is non-romantic. It is named after Greek philosopher Plato, though the philosopher never used the term himself.
Reply 7
Original post by Issakatie
Well probably not no, nearly all men (and women tbh) would expect and want sex from a relationship or marriage.

How about if the woman does not want to but the man does?
Would you say it could then lead to abuse?
What should be done for people in this position?
Original post by Anonymous
Would a guy want a platonic relationship with a woman?

What are the benefits and drawbacks?

If both people in the marriage want a platonic relationship (and maybe got married to please their families/for convenience), then that would be more likely to work out positively than if one party was misled/wasn't happy with that arrangement.

While a marriage is more than physical contact and romance, if those are expected by one of the people and there isn't clear communication, then it could lead to very negative consequences i.e. abuse.
Reply 9
Original post by PhoenixFortune
If both people in the marriage want a platonic relationship (and maybe got married to please their families/for convenience), then that would be more likely to work out positively than if one party was misled/wasn't happy with that arrangement.

While a marriage is more than physical contact and romance, if those are expected by one of the people and there isn't clear communication, then it could lead to very negative consequences i.e. abuse.

Thank you.
That sounds quite scary now to be honest!
Original post by Anonymous
How about if the woman does not want to but the man does?
Would you say it could then lead to abuse?
What should be done for people in this position?


From personal experience, having sex when you don't want it does eventually end up feeling like abuse. I chose to end my relationship because of it and I am much happier being single and not being put under that pressure.

If you are someone who wants a relationship but not sex, I second looking into asexual dating apps/websites.
Original post by Anonymous
From personal experience, having sex when you don't want it does eventually end up feeling like abuse. I chose to end my relationship because of it and I am much happier being single and not being put under that pressure.

If you are someone who wants a relationship but not sex, I second looking into asexual dating apps/websites.

I would like to but with a woman but I cannot due to religion as well as my family not accepting homosexuality.
I'm pressured to be in a relationship with a man, I wouldn't mind a platonic relationship but I couldn't deal with intimacy- it would have a negative effect on my mental health!
Original post by Anonymous
I would like to but with a woman but I cannot due to religion as well as my family not accepting homosexuality.
I'm pressured to be in a relationship with a man, I wouldn't mind a platonic relationship but I couldn't deal with intimacy- it would have a negative effect on my mental health!

is staying single an option?
Original post by Anonymous
I would like to but with a woman but I cannot due to religion as well as my family not accepting homosexuality.
I'm pressured to be in a relationship with a man, I wouldn't mind a platonic relationship but I couldn't deal with intimacy- it would have a negative effect on my mental health!

I know of "Muslim" couples (e.g. a gay man and a lesbian), who agreed to a marriage of convenience with each to keep each others families happy. (who are none the wiser). With families, they put on a united front... but in private, they do their own things (literally lol)
Original post by Old Skool Freak
I know of "Muslim" couples (e.g. a gay man and a lesbian), who agreed to a marriage of convenience with each to keep each others families happy. (who are none the wiser). With families, they put on a united front... but in private, they do their own things (literally lol)

What made you say 'Muslim' lol?
And no, my family have found me someone .. who likes me.
Also, its hard to find a gay Muslim man, that too of a similar age... also there family would like to visit mine and see each other and then would expect us to have children and all that.

Why would a gay Muslim man be any different to a straight Muslim man? Why could you not have a platonic relationship with either of them?

Thanks.
Original post by Anonymous
What made you say 'Muslim' lol?
And no, my family have found me someone .. who likes me.

I put Muslim in speech marks, because it's said time and time again that homosexuality and Islam are mutually exclusive (haram)... and you can't be gay and Muslim (Please note, this is NOT my opinion, just what I've heard time and time again from some of my friends / colleagues etc. who happen to be Muslim).

Also, its hard to find a gay Muslim man, that too of a similar age... also there family would like to visit mine and see each other and then would expect us to have children and all that.


The example I knew of met each other at University in their LGBTQ society. They were very close friends anyway, so they could act like a couple etc.

And I'm guessing she could have artificial insemination (or they grit their teeth and have sex purely for breeding purposes lol)



Why would a gay Muslim man be any different to a straight Muslim man? Why could you not have a platonic relationship with either of them?


Well with a confirmed gay man (note this is fully gay; not bi), there will be never be any pressure for sex from either party. Realistically, a straight person is likely to want sex / sexual play at some point (unless they're getting it from somewhere else as well)

Thanks.
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you.
That sounds quite scary now to be honest!

If you could discuss wanting a platonic relationship with your fiance, then you would probably be safer than if you left it unsaid. Otherwise he's going to assume that you're happy to have a physical relationship with him.
Original post by Old Skool Freak
I know of "Muslim" couples (e.g. a gay man and a lesbian), who agreed to a marriage of convenience with each to keep each others families happy. (who are none the wiser). With families, they put on a united front... but in private, they do their own things (literally lol)

Its sad they have to live their lives as lie to please others.

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