Hi everyone - just a warning, this is a bit of a read! I'm Olivia, a Year 10 student from England. This has been going on for the whole time we've been in lock down but it even used to happen with things like homework! I'm posting on here because I've tried everything to get them to see my point of view but they just won't budge and it annoys me more every time. I think it's easiest if I run through a situation that happened this morning.
Me: *is going upstairs to catch up on English work I didn't have time to do this week, explains this to Mum*
Mum: Do it down here please
Me: why? I'm not just going to not do it - this is important work for next year (I'm in y10)
Mum: The laptop needs to be downstairs please
Me: I need that for my work
Mum: do it down here then
Me: I get too distracted down there! (I have a younger brother and sister as well as two dogs), You know what fine *goes upstairs, sits on bed and starts to read a chapter of Pride & Prejudice alongside an audio book leaving the door open*
Mum: *comes in to get me downstairs even though she's seen I am doing the work* downstairs please
Me: but I'm doing the work and my door's open
Mum: these are the rules, downstairs please. I would have let you carry on if you were sitting at your desk (my chair for my desk is in my dad's office because he uses it when he's working)
Me: but I don't have a chair
Mum: You could have gone and got one
Me: *is baffled and doesn't know what to do so just gets up to bring my work downstairs, sits at the kitchen table with my dad making a load of noise washing up and my 9 year old sister having a meltdown*
Me: can you be quiet please, I'm trying to concentrate on my work. (politely)
Sis: you're never quiet when I ask (she never asks me so I just ignored lol)
Dad: Just do your work (avoiding the question)
Me: why can't I do it in my room? You know I'm not the sort of person to just not do a piece of work (they have told me they know this in the past)! I set a deadline with my teacher and I have to hand it in by 5pm today (Saturday)
Mum: because those are the rules
Me: ok can I have a reason for the rules please? I just want to know (I don't think this is an unreasonable thing to ask)
Mum: those are the rules!
Me: *is annoyed because this is the excuse every time but still speaks calmly* if I bring my chair up to my room am I allowed to do my work up there?
Mum: *thinks* fine but leave your door open
Me: thank you
On school days I cooperate and work downstairs because my brother and sister are also doing work (my sister does an hour of maths and an hour of English minimum a day and my brother is in y8 so has an hour per subject) in another room, but today was Saturday and everyone is in the kitchen and stuff so it's difficult. Even in usual times, I have to do homework in the kitchen which I find so ridiculous, especially as I am a very hardworking student which they know! I have tried to explain to them (calmly) my point of view but the excuse is always "that's the rule" and then tell me I'm being rude when I argue back (still calmly).
I used to have these thoughts "Am I really being that unreasonable?" and things like that bus as time has gone on I just can't find any reason that they can't explain to me why that is a rule or even just see it from my point of view. It almost feels like they refuse to see it my way now! Could anyone explain to me any reasons that my parents may be acting this way and if there's anything I'm doing wrong and I could fix? I just have had enough of this and needed to let it out - sorry that this was so long! Thanks for reading if you got this far lol