The Student Room Group

Was I right to call the police on my mum for this?

She was screaming at me because I wouldn't do what she wanted. I'm 19. She wanted me to turn down a job because she doesn't like the company.
She then grabbed me and hit me once, she called it a "light touch", I was scared. I probably should have called 101 but I was scared and 999 was the first thing I thought of.

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Reply 1
I feel awful for calling the police on her but I was scared.
Did you ask your mum the reason why she wanted you to turn down that job offer from that company? If she was really violent towards you, you was right to do that.
(edited 3 years ago)
Yes, you were right. :smile:
Violent thuggery is illegal and those who commit such a crime need a reminder that the law applies to them.
I hope that you were not badly hurt.
Take care of yourself!
Reply 4
Original post by Dragonball8
Did you ask your mum the reason why she wanted you to turn down that job offer from that company? If she was really violent towards you, you was right to do that.

Yes and her reason was that she personally doesn't like the company, thinks they are overpriced.
Reply 5
Original post by londonmyst
Yes, you were right. :smile:
Violent thuggery is illegal and those who commit such a crime need a reminder that the law applies to them.
I hope that you were not badly hurt.
Take care of yourself!

I'm not hurt too much but was frightened that she was going to hurt me more.
Original post by Amy9754
I'm not hurt too much but was frightened that she was going to hurt me more.

You have every right to involve the police in this. Domestic violence damages the psychological well-being of millions of people, and in fact, you are lucky it did not result in anything worse, because from the case studies I have gone through, it gets really bad. Remember, just because she is related to you, and I do not care how close she is to you, does not mean she has any right to touch you. Simple. I do not care if it was a light slap or not; she clearly had the intention of hurting you, and that is an issue. In fact, I would recommend you move out. A lot of people move out at 19, primarily for university, and so by doing this, you can experience independence and never had to suffer at the hands of domestic violence again.
What do you mean by she 'thinks that they are overpriced'?
(edited 3 years ago)
Reply 8
Original post by onceuponatime1
You have every right to involve the police in this. Domestic violence damages the psychological well-being of millions of people, and in fact, you are lucky it did not result in anything worse, because from the case studies I have gone through, it gets really bad. Remember, just because she is related to you, and I do not care how close she is to you, does not mean she has any right to touch you. Simple. I do not care if it was a light slap or not; she clearly had the intention of hurting you, and that is an issue. In fact, I would recommend you move out. A lot of people move out at 19, primarily for university, and so by doing this, you can experience independence and never had to suffer at the hands of domestic violence again.


Did she intend to hurt me more though???

I am thinking of moving out.

Before she tried to hurt me she kept on saying "if you say you will take the job then I'm taking your phone", thinking back she probably said that so I couldn't ring the police if she hurt me. I didn't give her my phone.
Reply 9
Original post by Dragonball8
What do you mean by that she 'thinks that they are overpriced' ?

She thinks that the products they sell are overpriced.
Original post by Amy9754
Did she intend to hurt me more though???

I am thinking of moving out.

Before she tried to hurt me she kept on saying "if you say you will take the job then I'm taking your phone", thinking back she probably said that so I couldn't ring the police if she hurt me. I didn't give her my phone.

It is about the intention first and foremost. No parent should ever have the intention of touching their child in this manner. In fact, I absolutely despise this sort of behaviour, and it is simply morally reprehensible. There is no excuse to hit your child. Period. You are 19. Be brave, make the move and escape. You cannot afford to go through this psychological degradation at this age, as this is what will remain with you throughout your life. What you do today shapes what you do tomorrow, and in the grand scheme of things, you remaining at home with her and her behaviour will shape your life for the worse.
So you wanted work and your mum wanted you to turn down the job offer because she didn't like the company's products, and she hit you. First of all I think that your mum was wrong to hit you, instead she should of consulted with you, and second of all I think moving out of the house would be a bad idea because living independently will be hard and I'm sure your mum didn't mean to do it. Some parents deal with certain situations with being aggressive, but that ain't the right. I think you should talk to her and tell her that you feel scared and you do not want to her to be aggressive towards you.
So what happened? Did the police come?
What was her reaction?
Has she calmed down?
Never known anyone to have such an extreme reaction? Its just a job?
Reply 13
Original post by Amy9754
She was screaming at me because I wouldn't do what she wanted. I'm 19. She wanted me to turn down a job because she doesn't like the company.
She then grabbed me and hit me once, she called it a "light touch", I was scared. I probably should have called 101 but I was scared and 999 was the first thing I thought of.

what did the police say when they turned up?
Abuse is abuse. If you let it slide, it would’ve been an open door for her to do it again in the future. You made the right choice. No one has the right to put their hands on you, doesn’t matter the severity of the hit.
Reply 15
Original post by onceuponatime1
It is about the intention first and foremost. No parent should ever have the intention of touching their child in this manner. In fact, I absolutely despise this sort of behaviour, and it is simply morally reprehensible. There is no excuse to hit your child. Period. You are 19. Be brave, make the move and escape. You cannot afford to go through this psychological degradation at this age, as this is what will remain with you throughout your life. What you do today shapes what you do tomorrow, and in the grand scheme of things, you remaining at home with her and her behaviour will shape your life for the worse.

I will try to leave.

I'm scared of her
Reply 16
Original post by 999tigger
So what happened? Did the police come?
What was her reaction?
Has she calmed down?
Never known anyone to have such an extreme reaction? Its just a job?

The police came. My mum did most of the talking and tried to spin what happened so that she wouldn't get into any trouble.

I'm still scared of her now, don't trust her not to try and hurt me.
Reply 17
Original post by 2500_2
what did the police say when they turned up?

My mum did most of the talking to them and tried to spin what happened so she wouldn't get into trouble.
Original post by Amy9754
I will try to leave.

I'm scared of her

Do you live in London? I am also 19 and going to start university in a few weeks. If need be, you are welcome to stay over at my accommodation for a few nights if you cannot find a place for now. There will also be females at my accommodation place, and so I can ask them to let them stay with you given your situation. Right now, you need to sort out all of your things. Every single letter you have received needs to be with you. Your passport, national insurance letter, driving licence and any thing in your name has to be with you. Get a suitcase and start packing slowly. You need essentials like clothing and basic oral care, skin care and body care. If you need any help with knowing what to pack and take with you, then I am completely happy to help. I am also in the same position as you, but to a much, much greater severity in terms of domestic abuse. Nonetheless, I am doing the right thing in moving out.
Original post by Amy9754
The police came. My mum did most of the talking and tried to spin what happened so that she wouldn't get into any trouble.

I'm still scared of her now, don't trust her not to try and hurt me.

Did you take the number or name of the officer attending?
How old are you and do you have any chance of leaving in the near future?
If she is that much of a threat then you need to think about either you moving out or her asking you to leave?
I doubt its the first domestic violence incident the officer has visited.

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