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I feel like I've messed up my chances with this girl

I feel like I have ****ed up massively with a girl.

bit of a back story

her friends say she likes me alot
she invited me to her house in February so I went. but I wasn't ready for a relationship so I tell her I don't want a relationship. I pretty much made it clear I wasn't interested but for months people are telling me she really likes you and when she saw me " flirting " with another girl she started crying etc


I like her alot now and we are really good friends for awhile. Her friends say she's really into me so
I invited her to my house last weekend. nothing big happened we just cuddled a hugged watched a few films, had pizza. I thought it went really well and I said we should hang out more often.

I want to plan something with her this weekend but said

I called her a few times and she just said shes busy but then talking on group chats and stuff.

i asked her today how she was feeling she said honestly ****

she said some stuff about shes got to much to deal with and she feels trapped and she wants some breathing room

I say some comforting And meaningful messages and say I'm her for her etc.

"I really appreciate that,btw if u think I’m being distant or blunt it’s not ur fault im just struggling"

I replied dw it's fine.


I don't know what to do as she's being blunt and studf texting and doesn't want to FaceTime but then she's posting stuff to instagram snapchat messaging in group chats and stuff and being normal with her friends. and taking about hours to respond to me even though it says she's online and she has never does this. Does this means shes not in to me anymore and she's bored of me? I going to college to tommorow to see her and ask her if she up to do something at the weekend. Any advice?

I just feel like I've made her wait to long and she's lost interest and I just feel regret that I should have made moves sooner when she was fully in to me.
Well if she's asked for space, you give her space.
It sounds like she doesn't want to talk to you right now for whatever reason, and I think you need to respect that.
If she's still interested, she'll come to you. But if you try too hard, you're just going to push her away further.
Either you made her wait and she got over you and now you're back, she doesn't want to be messed around again OR she really has got stuff going on and she needs time and space. In which case, show her you're there, but don't do it too much because that will just push her away
Original post by wastedcuriosity
Well if she's asked for space, you give her space.
It sounds like she doesn't want to talk to you right now for whatever reason, and I think you need to respect that.
If she's still interested, she'll come to you. But if you try too hard, you're just going to push her away further.


yh I've not spoken to her since she said she needs breathing room but I'll just try and be chill tomorrow with her at college
Sounds like she's got stuff going on g, give it time - that is the only option.

Good luck boss, stay calm
Original post by ItsStarLordMan
Either you made her wait and she got over you and now you're back, she doesn't want to be messed around again OR she really has got stuff going on and she needs time and space. In which case, show her you're there, but don't do it too much because that will just push her away


thanks that makes sense. do you think I should go see her at lunch or nah?
Original post by Native087
Sounds like she's got stuff going on g, give it time - that is the only option.

Good luck boss, stay calm


should I ask her if she wants to do something at the weekend when if I see her tomorrow ?
Original post by Wallstreetwaff
thanks that makes sense. do you think I should go see her at lunch or nah?

I think leave it for a bit. She has said she wants space and she's struggling. Show her you respect it and she could really appreciate that you listened to her. If she really is in a bad place, she doesn't need to be overwhelmed. Time and space is what she needs rn. Feel free to PM if you want :smile:
Original post by wastedcuriosity
Well if she's asked for space, you give her space.
It sounds like she doesn't want to talk to you right now for whatever reason, and I think you need to respect that.
If she's still interested, she'll come to you. But if you try too hard, you're just going to push her away further.


what could the reason be
Original post by Wallstreetwaff
should I ask her if she wants to do something at the weekend when if I see her tomorrow ?


Maybe just a little - If you fancy getting out on the weekend let me know - I'm free
Rather than making her decide on the spot.
Original post by Wallstreetwaff

she said some stuff about shes got to much to deal with and she feels trapped and she wants some breathing room.


She’s telling you what she needs from you just now.
Please respect that-pushing the issue will not help you. She knows you’re there when she needs/wants you -that’s enough for now.

Perhaps she’s confused about whether she likes your friend instead, perhaps she’s remembering how long you made her wait, perhaps she’s moved on, or perhaps she’s got other stuff going on in her life that is most important just now.
(edited 3 years ago)
Original post by Wallstreetwaff
what could the reason be

The only person who knows that is her.
Likely she's not interested anymore, or has things going on, as she said. Or a combination of both

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