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Do I have the right to be annoyed ?

So to cut a long story short, there’s this guy who I’ve been talking to for a couple of months now. From the very start we defined the “relationship” as friends with benefits, but never really laid any solid ground rules. I didn’t know to do this as this is my first time being in a fwb. He’s always been a really fast texter and consistent, but lately it’s been quite the opposite. He left me on delivered for days on end and then randomly popped up and said he’s been busy which is a totally valid reason and I can understand. However now I can tell he’s still continuing to basically ignore me as his snapscore is constantly rising and I can see when he’s active. (Before someone comes for me I know shouldn’t be checking this stuff but it’s old habits die hard ) Being busy is one thing but straight up ignoring me is another right ? I just don’t know whether to tell him it’s annoying me or not as we are a fwb and therefore technically don’t owe eachother anything but it’s just annoying to be ignored. If he dosent wanna continue anything with me i wouldn’t mind but I just wish he’d say so instead of leaving me in the dark about it. Some one give me advice as I can usually think quite rationally but this ones just confusing me...
Reply 1
Avatar for dokyeom
dokyeom
11
You are right to be annoyed and I think its better to just straight up ask him because sooner or later it does look like it will end if you guys don't communicate properly. It's not worth chasing a bone like you're a dog when you can spend your time doing other things.
Original post by Anonymous
So to cut a long story short, there’s this guy who I’ve been talking to for a couple of months now. From the very start we defined the “relationship” as friends with benefits, but never really laid any solid ground rules. I didn’t know to do this as this is my first time being in a fwb. He’s always been a really fast texter and consistent, but lately it’s been quite the opposite. He left me on delivered for days on end and then randomly popped up and said he’s been busy which is a totally valid reason and I can understand. However now I can tell he’s still continuing to basically ignore me as his snapscore is constantly rising and I can see when he’s active. (Before someone comes for me I know shouldn’t be checking this stuff but it’s old habits die hard ) Being busy is one thing but straight up ignoring me is another right ? I just don’t know whether to tell him it’s annoying me or not as we are a fwb and therefore technically don’t owe eachother anything but it’s just annoying to be ignored. If he dosent wanna continue anything with me i wouldn’t mind but I just wish he’d say so instead of leaving me in the dark about it. Some one give me advice as I can usually think quite rationally but this ones just confusing me...

Typical FWB behaviour tbf, when they get bored sis, they ignore.

Just be honest, and if you don't want this then say it, sometimes FWB isn't as great as it seems, I mean yeah no strings attached but if you're getting annoyed, then maybe it isn't for you, understandably so.
You should definitely message him about him ignoring you. Maybe he doesn’t want to continue anything so he’s just trying to ghost you, hopefully messaging him will spur him on to actually say outright if he does wanna carry on or not
Give yourself a pat on the back. You were right to regard him as fwb and not a boyfriend.

Now he's a "Not a friend and no benefits."

So it's time for you to move on to getting your next boyfriend. Or your next fwb.
I think you'll probably find that a boyfriend is more rewarding for you in the long term, even though it may take a bit more searching (as well as maybe a few false starts) to find a man that is suitable for this role.

If you are attractive (in the broadest sense of the term) enough to be somebody's fwb you are attractive enough to be somebody's girlfriend.
Get rid. It’s a lot harder for girls to do fwb, not trying to generalize but I find it difficult to believe that girls can actually do it without getting attached (as a girl myself). Sounds like you want someone that’s consistent and around for you and replies for you quickly, basically a boyfriend and this guy isn’t gonna be it from the sounds of things. To him you’re just a booty call since that’s all you’ve been doing as hard as it is to hear.
Reply 6
Avatar for ANM775
ANM775
20
Original post by Anonymous
So to cut a long story short, there’s this guy who I’ve been talking to for a couple of months now. From the very start we defined the “relationship” as friends with benefits, but never really laid any solid ground rules. I didn’t know to do this as this is my first time being in a fwb. He’s always been a really fast texter and consistent, but lately it’s been quite the opposite. He left me on delivered for days on end and then randomly popped up and said he’s been busy which is a totally valid reason and I can understand. However now I can tell he’s still continuing to basically ignore me as his snapscore is constantly rising and I can see when he’s active. (Before someone comes for me I know shouldn’t be checking this stuff but it’s old habits die hard ) Being busy is one thing but straight up ignoring me is another right ? I just don’t know whether to tell him it’s annoying me or not as we are a fwb and therefore technically don’t owe eachother anything but it’s just annoying to be ignored. If he dosent wanna continue anything with me i wouldn’t mind but I just wish he’d say so instead of leaving me in the dark about it. Some one give me advice as I can usually think quite rationally but this ones just confusing me...


start ignoring him when he asks for sex.

he'll soon change his behavior..
No, I don't think you have the right to be annoyed. He's not your boyfriend, it's casual FWB. He doesn't owe you anything and you don't owe him anything.

Stop acting clingy, makes you look desperate, not a good look tbh. It's not strings attached. When they are bored, they ignore you. Simple as that.

If you cannot deal with being ignored, don't do fwb. My best friend is doing that and she expects nothing from the guy apart from harmful fun and good company. Then when they are bored, they ghost and move onto another person.
*harmless fun

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