The Student Room Group

Friendship Problems

As you can read from the title, I am not happy. I am not from the UK and I am actually from a humble country (Brunei) with very little people. This makes it hard for me to trust people in schools as people tend to move from one school to another and seem to settle in well. In fact, I feel really sadden as many people changed (Oasis reference there but that's besides the point) and me changing school didn't make anything better. . I currently go to an international school that promises a good community but it has been rather underwhelming. I shouldn't say this but I never been invited to parties, hangouts or equivalent. This may sound stupid but people who aren't much of a social butterfly gets invited and not me. I just don't feel like myself anymore as I have to play acting okay but I am not. The other day, I got hurt as a friend I trusted told me to go off for 30 minutes and I did with no suspicion. When a crowd erupted with happy birthday song in the background, I didn't realised much until I saw my close friend having his bday with 15 other students. What a crook. I don't get why I am excluded for no reason. Please help me!
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
As you can read from the title, I am not happy. I am not from the UK and I am actually from a humble country (Brunei) with very little people. This makes it hard for me to trust people in schools as people tend to move from one school to another and seem to settle in well. In fact, I feel really sadden as many people changed (Oasis reference there but that's besides the point) and me changing school didn't make anything better. . I currently go to an international school that promises a good community but it has been rather underwhelming. I shouldn't say this but I never been invited to parties, hangouts or equivalent. This may sound stupid but people who aren't much of a social butterfly gets invited and not me. I just don't feel like myself anymore as I have to play acting okay but I am not. The other day, I got hurt as a friend I trusted told me to go off for 30 minutes and I did with no suspicion. When a crowd erupted with happy birthday song in the background, I didn't realised much until I saw my close friend having his bday with 15 other students. What a crook. I don't get why I am excluded for no reason. Please help me!

First of all, that guy is an idiot for excluding you. Unfortunately it can happen often, especially during the adolescent years (not a hard and fast rule). It is hard to settle in a place of ready made communities. Are there afterschool clubs/societies you can join? It is a good way of meeting people with mutual connections. Ditch the friend, he is not worth your time.

Try to stay in touch with those who have changed schools. Don't leave it too long at your age because it is harder to reconnect. Join the council, or some poetry/athletics/academic club. Think about your hobbies and build a community around it. Time to own your happiness again.
Reply 2
Original post by Pelola
First of all, that guy is an idiot for excluding you. Unfortunately it can happen often, especially during the adolescent years (not a hard and fast rule). It is hard to settle in a place of ready made communities. Are there afterschool clubs/societies you can join? It is a good way of meeting people with mutual connections. Ditch the friend, he is not worth your time.

Try to stay in touch with those who have changed schools. Don't leave it too long at your age because it is harder to reconnect. Join the council, or some poetry/athletics/academic club. Think about your hobbies and build a community around it. Time to own your happiness again.

There are a couple of good CCAs I joined such as Karate and Football Copa 11-13. I am in the council and I took the Eco Rep post. I am quite happy being in Karate. Really detox my bad thoughts tbh
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
There are a couple of good CCAs I joined such as Karate and Football Copa 11-13. I am in the council and I took the Eco Rep post. I am quite happy being in Karate. Really detox my bad thoughts tbh

That's really good! You're taking steps towards a physical and mental health improvement. Maybe take karate competitively? Build a network within all of this.You might build a long lasting friendship with someone or a group. Friendships constantly evolve as you grow, both in age and maturity. It's a part of life. The good, the bad and the ugly - can be seen in relationships and friendships.
You have a bright future ahead of you, so let the haters hate and keep being you!
Reply 4
Original post by Pelola
That's really good! You're taking steps towards a physical and mental health improvement. Maybe take karate competitively? Build a network within all of this.You might build a long lasting friendship with someone or a group. Friendships constantly evolve as you grow, both in age and maturity. It's a part of life. The good, the bad and the ugly - can be seen in relationships and friendships.
You have a bright future ahead of you, so let the haters hate and keep being you!

Thank you so much. I wanted to but I haven't done so. Tbh, you are so much better in responding than most of my friends
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you so much. I wanted to but I haven't done so. Tbh, you are so much better in responding than most of my friends

The right friends are out there. Just think of them as being stuck in traffic. Unfortunately there are many people who won't or cannot understand the requirements of friendship. This can be for various reasons.
And you are welcome x You've got this

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