Being called ugly, can’t work out if it was a joke or what..

I work in the NHS and one of the assistants off the ward came into my office asking about a patients mobility. She is very chatty/outgoing, can be over the top/a bit dizzy but due to this she has good rapport with the patients.

Anyway something she said kind of got to me a bit. I wasn’t wearing a mask as its a big office/more than 2 metres and she took her mask off then said ‘I’m not used to seeing you without your mask’, ‘your still ugly arnt you’, one of the male workers in the office started laughing a bit and she pointed to him and then laughed. I just said ‘yeah. Then about 5 minutes later she said ‘you look older without your mask’. I just said ‘I am older’ she said ‘how old are you’ I told her and then I can’t remember what she said. She was just being her usual chatty self around these conversations.

The thing is Ive been called ugly in the past a few times By people even my mum as I’m not great at styling myself etc. People have said Im not the best of looking, have crap hair -I find it hard to style my hair. I remember one worker saying that I looked like I’d been dragged through an hedge, I can’t tell if my hair looks ok or not most of the time.

Ive just had it dyed blonde though yesterday lol I thought it looked ok.

Anyway yea I can’t help thinking there was some truth to her comment I mean how would you take it?

I know someone who does this to people regardless of whether they're ugly or beautiful. They just think it's a joke.

In fact some people think they can say this to someone precisely because that person isn't ugly, and so they don't perceive it as offensive. If that makes sense? Like I'm a size 8 but in the past people have called me chubby as a joke, say if I had a big lunch. Obviously doesn't bother me at all, but the situation would be totally unacceptable if I was actually overweight.

Maybe it's like that?

This is a very reassuring reply lol, thanks !

That was extremely unprofessional and uncalled for. You’re there to work, not to have your looks rated. If she keeps being a snide ***** then don’t be afraid to pull her up about it and say that you don’t appreciate being spoken to like that. Never let people talk to you like ****.