Keep having flashbacks from abuse

My parents were abusive to me and I’m now in foster care and I keep having flashbacks constantly that scare me and I have nightmares frequently. I feel scared to sleep sometimes.

Any advice?

Hope your good x

Are you getting any MH input atm? Therapy can help you process what happened and teach you how to manage the associated feelings as well as teach you ways to better manage nightmares.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Pathway

Are you getting any MH input atm? Therapy can help you process what happened and teach you how to manage the associated feelings as well as teach you ways to better manage nightmares.

No, I was originally on the MH waiting list but got rejected since I didn’t meet the criteria.

Reply 4

Pathway

Original post by Anonymous

No, I was originally on the MH waiting list but got rejected since I didn’t meet the criteria.

Did they explain why you didn't meet criteria? Did they give you any other options?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by Pathway

Did they explain why you didn't meet criteria? Did they give you any other options?

No, they didn’t but they directed me to contact my college i.e university instead

Reply 6

Pathway

Original post by Anonymous

No, they didn’t but they directed me to contact my college i.e university instead

Have you spoken to anyone at your university?

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by Pathway

Have you spoken to anyone at your university?

No, as they can't really help with this.

Reply 8

RonnieO

I'd suggest trying to speak to someone at the University, a lot of them will have a free counselling service available for students. Always worth a try - remember that something is better than nothing :smile:

There are also charities that could help, such as Mind or Samaritans.

See if your uni is registered with Togetherall (formerly known as Big White Wall) :smile:

It's an online platform where you can get self guided courses and just one big online community where you can get anonymous support from other people.

Reply 9

OxFossil

As well as looking into university counselling provision, if your local CAMHS won't accept you, there may be a private psychotherapist locally who could help. Although there would be a charge, your local authority has a legal responsibility to ensure your well-being. They should be willing to pay for this work to be done (though god knows that can be a hard job). Anyway, your social worker, specialist LAC nurse and advocacy service should all be able to advocate for this to happen on your behalf. That's as well as your foster carers of course!

(edited 3 years ago)

Reply 10

Pathway

Original post by Anonymous

No, as they can't really help with this.

Go back to your GP and explain the situation to them, and explain how this is affecting you. And that you need help. For more complicated trauma you should be referred on to your local secondary care team for help with your trauma. They can't not help you. If not, your local IAPT service might accept self-referrals and you might be able to get help that way.

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

Original post by Pathway

Okay, I will rearrange an appointment with my doctor and explain the situation again.

Reply 12

Pathway

Original post by Anonymous

Okay, I will rearrange an appointment with my doctor and explain the situation again.

Explain how it's affecting you day-to-day too (e.g. sleep, appetite, startling, nightmares, etc.).

Reply 13

OxFossil

Original post by Anonymous

Okay, I will rearrange an appointment with my doctor and explain the situation again.

If you are going via your GP, it will help a lot if you understand what the criteria for accepting a referral are. (Not all GPs are equally good at writing a good referral letter, and some people get wrongly turned down as a result).

Points to make include:
- definitely emphasise you are in the looked after system
- describe how much the problem is affecting you (eg, 'intrusive thoughts', ' hypervigilence', 'low mood' , 'most days, most of the time' and 'interferes with normal daily life')
- explain this problem has gone on for a long time (at least 6 months is a typical requirement )
- describe what you have already done to try and make things better (such as self-help CBT apps, mindfulness, relaxation, etc)

If you have support from an advocate, it'll be easier.

Obviously, since your situation is quite complicated, I would recommend professional help. But meanwhile, what you are describing might be helped with some basic anxiety management techniques. Here's an example: https://www.anxietycanada.com/learn-about-anxiety/anxiety-in-youth/