The Student Room Group

Nasty Housemate

I am a second year student and I got a house with 3 of my friends. One of my friends dropped out, so someone else filled the room. This person is really nasty to me and one of my friends, attacks us for every small thing, kicked off at me calling me names when I said we don't need a tv licence and I couldn't afford to pay for one when its my tv thats in the living room, he lied about me on his instagram story to his ungodly amount of followers to make me look bad and could've cost me my job and threatened to get me evicted after I visited friends and broke the Rule of 6 when he was meeting a different 6 people every day if not more often, has eaten my food out of the freezer, constantly makes little digs, says my food stinks, and picks on me for what I choose to spend my money on. With my other friend, he is all the way up his ass and pretends hes gods gift, so this friend does not understand how I and our other friend feel. I feel entirely unwelcome in my own home, as if its rude of me to go into my own kitchen or use the shower, and if I ever sit down in the living room I feel like an intruder. I spend the majority of my time with my boyfriend, but it is not healthy for me to be around him as constantly as I am, and the housemate recently brought covid into our house so I immediately dipped, tested negative and stayed with my boyfriend for the full 2 week isolation period. For next year, the bad housemate has not yet chosen if he wants to move out and I don't want to leave this house, but the friend he is nice to is signing either way regardless of how me and the other friend feel, and the other doesn't want to leave him. I don't know what I can do at this point because I don't want to leave my house and let him win, I don't want to miss my window to find somewhere else, and I don't want to be left without options or by myself. Any advice?
(edited 3 years ago)
see if there’s legal action you can take in the name of abuse. because honestly it sounds like abuse and manipulation
Reply 2
I am a second year student and I got a house with 3 of my friends. One of my friends dropped out, so someone else filled the room. This person is really nasty to me and one of my friends, attacks us for every small thing, kicked off at me calling me names when I said we don't need a tv licence and I couldn't afford to pay for one when its my tv thats in the living room, he lied about me on his instagram story to his ungodly amount of followers to make me look bad and could've cost me my job, has eaten my food out of the freezer, constantly makes little digs, says my food stinks, and picks on me for what I choose to spend my money on. With my other friend, he is all the way up his ass and pretends hes gods gift, so this friend does not understand how I and our other friend feel. I feel unwelcome in my own house, like I can't use the bathroom or kitchen because I feel like an intruder, and like I'm not allowed to sit in the living room. I spend most of my time staying with my boyfriend. For next year, the bad housemate has not yet chosen if he wants to move out and I don't want to leave this house, but the friend he is nice to is signing either way regardless of how me and the other friend feel, and the other doesn't want to leave him. I don't know what I can do at this point because I don't want to leave my house and let him win, I don't want to miss my window to find somewhere else, and I don't want to be left without options or by myself. Any advice?
Reply 3
Original post by brokestudent3
see if there’s legal action you can take in the name of abuse. because honestly it sounds like abuse and manipulation

I'm not really sure if it would stand since I don't have evidence and he is very good at making people think he is an angel :/
Reply 4
What a **** he is, tbh I don’t know what advice to give but stay strong !
Reply 5
Original post by BigFawn
What a **** he is, tbh I don’t know what advice to give but stay strong !

Thank you! I'm trying my best :')
Original post by plantmom
I'm not really sure if it would stand since I don't have evidence and he is very good at making people think he is an angel :/


if he’s treating you and your friend horribly you’ve got someone to back you up, your friend who he treats nicely has surely witnessed it at some point. record what he says, im a survivor of domestic abuse and an abusive mum however we went through the scottish justice system but if i can help just drop me a message ! also if he’s like affecting your mental health and your comfort in your home etc you could also go for a mental health evaluation and that’ll be evidence too
Reply 7
Original post by brokestudent3
if he’s treating you and your friend horribly you’ve got someone to back you up, your friend who he treats nicely has surely witnessed it at some point. record what he says, im a survivor of domestic abuse and an abusive mum however we went through the scottish justice system but if i can help just drop me a message ! also if he’s like affecting your mental health and your comfort in your home etc you could also go for a mental health evaluation and that’ll be evidence too

I already have diagnosises for depression and anxiety through the uni healthcare, and am in the process for an inattentive ADHD diagnosis. do you think maybe if i spoke to uni about it they would offer advice? mental healthcare in young adults is obsolete in england so i dont know if they would do much :/
Original post by plantmom
I already have diagnosises for depression and anxiety through the uni healthcare, and am in the process for an inattentive ADHD diagnosis. do you think maybe if i spoke to uni about it they would offer advice? mental healthcare in young adults is obsolete in england so i dont know if they would do much :/


just based on the fact that you’ve already been diagnosed will help if you do decide to pursue legal action because he’s honestly making it so much worse for u. i’d definitely speak to ur uni and advisors about what you could do. i’m in touch with a charity called WhoCaresScotland so it’s worth seeing if there’s an equivalent to that in England because they’ll be able to help you a lot more as well

also if he lied about you and almost cost you your job u can sue for defamation
(edited 3 years ago)
Why do you think he’s acting like that? Have you tried to speak to him about it?
(edited 3 years ago)
Reply 10
Original post by brokestudent3
just based on the fact that you’ve already been diagnosed will help if you do decide to pursue legal action because he’s honestly making it so much worse for u. i’d definitely speak to ur uni and advisors about what you could do. i’m in touch with a charity called WhoCaresScotland so it’s worth seeing if there’s an equivalent to that in England because they’ll be able to help you a lot more as well


thank you, ill look into speaking with uni advisors :smile: ive dealt with gaslighting, emotional abuse and manipulation for a long long time so im sure you understand sometimes its hard to see severity when it doesnt line up with previous instances. youre one of the good ones in this world, thank you for your help and i hope you are proud of yourself for overcoming so much :smile:
Original post by plantmom
thank you, ill look into speaking with uni advisors :smile: ive dealt with gaslighting, emotional abuse and manipulation for a long long time so im sure you understand sometimes its hard to see severity when it doesnt line up with previous instances. youre one of the good ones in this world, thank you for your help and i hope you are proud of yourself for overcoming so much :smile:


you should be proud too and i hope things get better! genuinely drop me a message whenever if u need anything
Reply 12
Original post by YaliaV123
Why do you think he’s acting like that? Have you tried to speak to him about it?

i have, he just calls me childish and exaggerates to others in the name of gossip. my housemates dont help either, they have asked me to apologise to him before to keep the peace after he was particularly nasty to me :/
Reply 13
Original post by brokestudent3
you should be proud too and i hope things get better! genuinely drop me a message whenever if u need anything

thank you so much, i really appreciate your advice a lot <333
Original post by plantmom
i have, he just calls me childish and exaggerates to others in the name of gossip. my housemates dont help either, they have asked me to apologise to him before to keep the peace after he was particularly nasty to me :/


They are also your friends? Not very good friends. Is he trying to make you and your friend move out for some reason?
Reply 15
Original post by YaliaV123
They are also your friends? Not very good friends. Is he trying to make you and your friend move out for some reason?

he said in the first week that he wanted to stay in this house next year but with his "real friends"... they are no longer his friends. hes also still looking at studio appartments but hasnt decided if hes going or not. its all very frustrating!
Have you thought about reporting it? Maybe if you report it, it'll force him to get his act together
Original post by plantmom
I am a second year student and I got a house with 3 of my friends. One of my friends dropped out, so someone else filled the room. This person is really nasty to me and one of my friends, attacks us for every small thing, kicked off at me calling me names when I said we don't need a tv licence and I couldn't afford to pay for one when its my tv thats in the living room, he lied about me on his instagram story to his ungodly amount of followers to make me look bad and could've cost me my job and threatened to get me evicted after I visited friends and broke the Rule of 6 when he was meeting a different 6 people every day if not more often, has eaten my food out of the freezer, constantly makes little digs, says my food stinks, and picks on me for what I choose to spend my money on. With my other friend, he is all the way up his ass and pretends hes gods gift, so this friend does not understand how I and our other friend feel. I feel entirely unwelcome in my own home, as if its rude of me to go into my own kitchen or use the shower, and if I ever sit down in the living room I feel like an intruder. I spend the majority of my time with my boyfriend, but it is not healthy for me to be around him as constantly as I am, and the housemate recently brought covid into our house so I immediately dipped, tested negative and stayed with my boyfriend for the full 2 week isolation period. For next year, the bad housemate has not yet chosen if he wants to move out and I don't want to leave this house, but the friend he is nice to is signing either way regardless of how me and the other friend feel, and the other doesn't want to leave him. I don't know what I can do at this point because I don't want to leave my house and let him win, I don't want to miss my window to find somewhere else, and I don't want to be left without options or by myself. Any advice?

haha bro start doing voodoo rituals with your friend (make sure he doesn't get it on camera tho, cuh then you'd just be taken as a freak), ion know maybe every night if you're awake start screaming to wake him up but say you were having nightmares, start sleep walking and banging on doors or w/e. nasty people usually have fears of something supernatural, make weird coincidences happen. haha ion know find out his parents or family member names without him knowing, have a party with dolls and have his family member names written on their foreheads with sticky notes n say you found out by doing voodoo rituals n creep him out. haha maybe you might do one of these, maybe not but hopefully it inspired you to do something about him/it.
Report to them to the uni. Then call the police on them if they break lockdown rules.
Reply 19
Original post by Elise_adventures
Report to them to the uni. Then call the police on them if they break lockdown rules.

i mean i break lockdown rules to go stay with my bf to get away from him but i dont break any others

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