The Student Room Group

How old should I be to move in with my boyfriend

I’m currently 18 and I turn 19 later this year and my boy friend is 21 almost 22. We have been dating for only 6 months but the conversation of me going away to college has been a big topic. Him knowing from previous relationships that he hates long distance and I know I would hate it too. We have talked about possibly moving in together this coming September so that I can get out of my parents house and learn how to live on my own before I would move away with him to where ever I decide to continue college. Am I too young to even consider this? He is my best friend and has become such a huge part of my life we spend pretty much 24/7 together as it is even though we are able to have time apart. I just don’t know if it is a smart move at such a young age.
You haven’t known him for very long and living with someone can add a lot of stress to a relationship.
There's no right answer. It could be seen as young to move in together. I'm not sure of your logic of moving in together 'to get used to it' before moving off together to college. Or how your boyfriend is mobile enough with work to be able to follow you. 'Get you out of your parents house' has a strange tone to it... Whose need is that?
Slight red flag that it could be seen as a controlling move which maybe leads to him stopping you moving.
I don't think you're too young to consider it but there's some points to think about.
Are you going to college or university (assuming you're from the UK), there's a big difference and from your age, I wasn't sure.
Who would be paying the bills? If you're at uni, then you can put money towards it but if you're not or don't have a part time job, would that mean he pays for everything? That's a very dangerous situation to be in and can cause you to easily be trapped
Do you trust this person with your life? Moving in, especially away from family, puts you in an extremely vulnerable position and you need to think if you feel comfortable with this
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
I’m currently 18 and I turn 19 later this year and my boy friend is 21 almost 22. We have been dating for only 6 months but the conversation of me going away to college has been a big topic. Him knowing from previous relationships that he hates long distance and I know I would hate it too. We have talked about possibly moving in together this coming September so that I can get out of my parents house and learn how to live on my own before I would move away with him to where ever I decide to continue college. Am I too young to even consider this? He is my best friend and has become such a huge part of my life we spend pretty much 24/7 together as it is even though we are able to have time apart. I just don’t know if it is a smart move at such a young age.


Can either of you afford to live on your own? That would be my question. You wouldn't want to get into a trap were your dependant on each other.
I wouldnt say age is really that important. But that financial stability and independence is
I love my parents a lot but I have wanted to get out on my own since I was young we tend to argue a lot when we spend time together and it has nothing to do with him. As far as getting used to it I mean living on my own and out of my parents house but still having them there if I need help with different things. As far as my boyfriend goes he is okay with whatever I decide and we will try to do long distance. This is also 6 months in advance but we need to start thinking about it now. Most of his work is strictly online and he has a degree in mechanical engineering so it will not be hard for him to get a job where ever I decide to go to college.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
There's no right answer. It could be seen as young to move in together. I'm not sure of your logic of moving in together 'to get used to it' before moving off together to college. Or how your boyfriend is mobile enough with work to be able to follow you. 'Get you out of your parents house' has a strange tone to it... Whose need is that?
Slight red flag that it could be seen as a controlling move which maybe leads to him stopping you moving

What I mean by getting used to it is living out of my parents house. I have never lived outside of their house and I would want to be close to them when I first move out. I love them dearly but we argue a lot and I have wanted to move out long before I ever met my boyfriend so this is 100% me. He is okay with what ever I choose and just wants me to be happy. My boyfriend has a degree in mechanical engineering so it will not be hard for him to find work in the areas im thinking about going to college.
Reply 7
Original post by oglez92
Can either of you afford to live on your own? That would be my question. You wouldn't want to get into a trap were your dependant on each other.
I wouldnt say age is really that important. But that financial stability and independence is

probally not in the area I live in but if it didnt work I could move back in with my parents and they are will to help with bills
Reply 8
Original post by VeritySleeps
I don't think you're too young to consider it but there's some points to think about.
Are you going to college or university (assuming you're from the UK), there's a big difference and from your age, I wasn't sure.
Who would be paying the bills? If you're at uni, then you can put money towards it but if you're not or don't have a part time job, would that mean he pays for everything? That's a very dangerous situation to be in and can cause you to easily be trapped
Do you trust this person with your life? Moving in, especially away from family, puts you in an extremely vulnerable position and you need to think if you feel comfortable with this

We both would be paying. He has a full time job while I have a part time job and I am a student. I trust him completly and I would only be moving about 20mins away from my parents so they would be close if I ever needed help
Anything other than in marriage is a sin.
Original post by Anonymous
probally not in the area I live in but if it didnt work I could move back in with my parents and they are will to help with bills


Thats fair enough then. It seems like you'd have an escape route then. Just in the event that something did go wrong. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm dooming this to fail before it's even begun, but things like this happen
Original post by Anonymous
I’m currently 18 and I turn 19 later this year and my boy friend is 21 almost 22. We have been dating for only 6 months but the conversation of me going away to college has been a big topic. Him knowing from previous relationships that he hates long distance and I know I would hate it too. We have talked about possibly moving in together this coming September so that I can get out of my parents house and learn how to live on my own before I would move away with him to where ever I decide to continue college. Am I too young to even consider this? He is my best friend and has become such a huge part of my life we spend pretty much 24/7 together as it is even though we are able to have time apart. I just don’t know if it is a smart move at such a young age.


you are a legal adult so technically your not too young, but just make sure you both feel comfortable moving in with him as it may cause arguements, but if your love for eachother is as strong as you say, you should be fine
pm me if u need/want anything
xx
Original post by Anonymous
We both would be paying. He has a full time job while I have a part time job and I am a student. I trust him completly and I would only be moving about 20mins away from my parents so they would be close if I ever needed help

I can't see any huge issues so if you all feel comfortable, there's no reason not to :smile:
Never........no matter how much you love him, you should enjoy time with yourself, after few years, especially after you have kids, you will regret you were too rush to live with someone, never spend some time with yourself.....

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