The Student Room Group

Linking with a guy and has a knife?

Hi, I'm really concerned at this minute. I'm not sure if he's manipulating me or he's having a hard time. One minute he's literally the sweetest and then there's occasions where we will have an argument but it's always my fault and he has anger issues, he claims. He does explain that he's sorry and blah blah blah. But today he told me he was a gypsy, but not a stereotypical one. I've had bad experiences with them, including knives...

He then sent me a picture of a knife... and said it was a gift from his neighbour but I still don't like it.


Do I have the right to feel scared and annoyed?

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People don’t always change the way you want them to and you have to accept that but if you don’t want to be with someone who makes you anxious then I say break it off. People you love are meant to make you safe not frightened.
(edited 3 years ago)
Reply 2
Original post by aistudent
People don’t always change the way you want them to and you have to accept that but if you don’t want to be with someone who makes you anxious then I say break it off. People you love are meant to make you safe not frightened.

I do love him. I find it difficult to stop over thinking. I do love him, of course, just have to get to know him a bit more.
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
Hi, I'm really concerned at this minute. I'm not sure if he's manipulating me or he's having a hard time. One minute he's literally the sweetest and then there's occasions where we will have an argument but it's always my fault and he has anger issues, he claims. He does explain that he's sorry and blah blah blah. But today he told me he was a gypsy, but not a stereotypical one. I've had bad experiences with them, including knives...

He then sent me a picture of a knife... and said it was a gift from his neighbour but I still don't like it.


Do I have the right to feel scared and annoyed?

You ALWAYS have the right to feel scared and annoyed and I say trust your gut, you clearly don’t trust or feel comfortable with him so GET OUT of the situation. Even if he does have redeeming qualities you don’t mention he’s clearly manipulating you, and I’d bet gaslighting is a big part of that. If you don’t feel safe or happy, remove yourself and you will be better off in the long term.
Original post by Anonymous
I do love him. I find it difficult to stop over thinking. I do love him, of course, just have to get to know him a bit more.


I want to believe you but first you have to start believing yourself, believing the truth.
I feel like you might be emotionally or physically attracted to him but if he’s dangerous then it’s best to let him go, he could hurt you in both ways and none of us won’t that to happen.
Reply 5
Original post by Fayem03
You ALWAYS have the right to feel scared and annoyed and I say trust your gut, you clearly don’t trust or feel comfortable with him so GET OUT of the situation. Even if he does have redeeming qualities you don’t mention he’s clearly manipulating you, and I’d bet gaslighting is a big part of that. If you don’t feel safe or happy, remove yourself and you will be better off in the long term.


I think it's partly due to my past with people like this and I over think things but he's been there so much and made me feel much better about myself but I'm always nervous, we haven't met irl yet, we've FaceTimed which was absolutely good... we share a lot of banta... our phone calls also but it's just messaging that gets harder. You know? I think lockdown has also caused upset and anger in some peoole.
Reply 6
Original post by CaptainDuckie
Knife for what?

Not sure. It was a gift apparently.
Original post by Anonymous
Not sure. It was a gift apparently.


Stabbing x
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
I want to believe you but first you have to start believing yourself, believing the truth.
I feel like you might be emotionally or physically attracted to him but if he’s dangerous then it’s best to let him go, he could hurt you in both ways and none of us won’t that to happen.

I am emotionally attached and physically too but he sent a picture of it and I was scared but he couldn't understand why I was and got angry with me because I was anxious.
Damn this don’t sound too good
Original post by Anonymous
Stabbing x

Idk though. I can't just accuse him but I will have to see how it goes x
Original post by Anonymous
Damn this don’t sound too good

It doesn't but I think I'm over thinking it all ngl.
trust ur gut baby girl XXX
Original post by Anonymous
Hi, I'm really concerned at this minute. I'm not sure if he's manipulating me or he's having a hard time. One minute he's literally the sweetest and then there's occasions where we will have an argument but it's always my fault and he has anger issues, he claims. He does explain that he's sorry and blah blah blah. But today he told me he was a gypsy, but not a stereotypical one. I've had bad experiences with them, including knives...

He then sent me a picture of a knife... and said it was a gift from his neighbour but I still don't like it.


Do I have the right to feel scared and annoyed?

Errr... what is the context of the knife picture? If he sent it to you just after an arguement it’s probably not a good sign
Original post by Lwexi12
trust ur gut baby girl XXX

Thank you xxx
Reply 15
He needs to work on his anger issues before getting someone else mixed up in his life. Sending pictures of knives out of anger is a red flag.
Original post by Garnettoi
Errr... what is the context of the knife picture? If he sent it to you just after an arguement it’s probably not a good sign


Well, he sent it because I was telling him about how this gypsy man asked if I had kids but I'm too young... then he asked me if I liked gypsies and I said not really because I had some that lived in our town for a while and almost stabbed my sister for no reason but she ran away to this building thankfully. Then he showed me his.
Original post by LovelyMrFox
He needs to work on his anger issues before getting someone else mixed up in his life. Sending pictures of knives out of anger is a red flag.

yeah fr, if i was the one receiving those I would almost take that as a threat.....
Original post by LovelyMrFox
He needs to work on his anger issues before getting someone else mixed up in his life. Sending pictures of knives out of anger is a red flag.

This was before our argument. If you read above in my other response.
Original post by Anonymous
Well, he sent it because I was telling him about how this gypsy man asked if I had kids but I'm too young... then he asked me if I liked gypsies and I said not really because I had some that lived in our town for a while and almost stabbed my sister for no reason but she ran away to this building thankfully. Then he showed me his.

Oooh okay, I don’t think that’s a good thing then. Someone sending you a picture of a knife after you’ve just talked about your sister nearly getting stabbed is a bit of an AH. I would definitely be wary

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