My 17 year olds restrictions. Am I being unreasonable?

I have a 17 year old lad who is currently in sixth form. I have placed a load of restrictions on him, these haven’t changed in 3 years. They are, no video games past 7 o’clock, bedtime at 9:30 on weekdays and 22:30 on weekends, he ends up staying up until 23:30 every night anyway. He also has to tell me where he is after 5 o’clock everyday. On top of this he is not allowed his phone in bed, as it must stay downstairs to charge. We have been arguing back and forth recently, he says that I treat him like a baby. I wanted to know if I am treating him like a baby, and what I can change to better our relationship.

Similar rules to me and I’m younger than that- he’s about to be an adult (18) so he needs to gain a little more independence and learn for himself because if he plans on going to uni of anything like that than he will have to do things on his own. He had to learn about responsibility but he lives in your house so your rules but don’t be too hard on him as he’s going to really struggle as he goes to uni if he has all these restrictions on him so maybe let him take more responsibility for his actions. That being said parenting is never easy so well done for trying hard with him!

[...] these haven’t changed in 3 years.

I have a 17 year old lad who is currently in sixth form. I have placed a load of restrictions on him, these haven’t changed in 3 years. They are, no video games past 7 o’clock, bedtime at 9:30 on weekdays and 22:30 on weekends, he ends up staying up until 23:30 every night anyway. He also has to tell me where he is after 5 o’clock everyday. On top of this he is not allowed his phone in bed, as it must stay downstairs to charge. We have been arguing back and forth recently, he says that I treat him like a baby. I wanted to know if I am treating him like a baby, and what I can change to better our relationship.

I have a 17 year old lad who is currently in sixth form. I have placed a load of restrictions on him, these haven’t changed in 3 years. They are, no video games past 7 o’clock, bedtime at 9:30 on weekdays and 22:30 on weekends, he ends up staying up until 23:30 every night anyway. He also has to tell me where he is after 5 o’clock everyday. On top of this he is not allowed his phone in bed, as it must stay downstairs to charge. We have been arguing back and forth recently, he says that I treat him like a baby. I wanted to know if I am treating him like a baby, and what I can change to better our relationship.

I have a 17 year old lad who is currently in sixth form. I have placed a load of restrictions on him, these haven’t changed in 3 years. They are, no video games past 7 o’clock, bedtime at 9:30 on weekdays and 22:30 on weekends, he ends up staying up until 23:30 every night anyway. He also has to tell me where he is after 5 o’clock everyday. On top of this he is not allowed his phone in bed, as it must stay downstairs to charge. We have been arguing back and forth recently, he says that I treat him like a baby. I wanted to know if I am treating him like a baby, and what I can change to better our relationship.

I have a 17 year old lad who is currently in sixth form. I have placed a load of restrictions on him, these haven’t changed in 3 years. They are, no video games past 7 o’clock, bedtime at 9:30 on weekdays and 22:30 on weekends, he ends up staying up until 23:30 every night anyway. He also has to tell me where he is after 5 o’clock everyday. On top of this he is not allowed his phone in bed, as it must stay downstairs to charge. We have been arguing back and forth recently, he says that I treat him like a baby. I wanted to know if I am treating him like a baby, and what I can change to better our relationship.

Your son is old enough to have sex and join the army. You shouldn't be dictating his bedtimes.

He is going to be an adult and move out in a year or so and he will never have been responsible for his own wellbeing.

I'm seventeen and choose when to sleep, what to do with my phone and when to stop playing video games. I have been free to make these choices for at least three years and have not had bedtimes like that since year nine.

I am also a straight A/A* student and have offers from several top russel group universities. When you treat your child as an independent individual, they will act like one and be more respectful to you.

Setting boundaries is important but your son will be an adult soon and will have no boundaries imposed. If you don't give him time to experiment and test those boundaries, when he is free he will do far more harm to himself than he would have if he had had time to test things out and learn from his mistakes.

You are too humble.

I have a 17 year old lad who is currently in sixth form. I have placed a load of restrictions on him, these haven’t changed in 3 years. They are, no video games past 7 o’clock, bedtime at 9:30 on weekdays and 22:30 on weekends, he ends up staying up until 23:30 every night anyway. He also has to tell me where he is after 5 o’clock everyday. On top of this he is not allowed his phone in bed, as it must stay downstairs to charge. We have been arguing back and forth recently, he says that I treat him like a baby. I wanted to know if I am treating him like a baby, and what I can change to better our relationship.