Alone

I feel like my frnds just don’t like me as much as they used to because I stopped telling them the bad stuff that goes on in my life but I can’t help it. I just don’t feel comfortable talking about it and now I feel like don’t have any close actual friends. Of course I couldn’t tell ppl about this because I’d just sound like I’m attentions seeking and whining and I just can’t with myself rn. I hate my personality rn I’m so fake and closed off that I’m using a chat room cuz I can’t talk to my frnds in real life. I’m just so done, what’s wrong with me ppl used to like me but idk how I did that. Ik everyone preferred the old me but I don’t know how to go back

Hey, I understand how you feel to be true myself I don't have any 'actual close friends 'like with who I share everything. I don't usually talk about my personal life and my deep thoughts with my friends. I used to feel very lonely sometimes and like feel that I am a boring person as icant hold a conversation with people for very long like make them interested and happy when they talk to me it just ended up awkward. But through time you know I found you don't have to please anyone you. I agree friends are an important part of life and like socialising and having a group or someone to talk to but it can't be helped not all persons you meet are your friends or you haven't met someone yet you can truly feel comfortable without having to share your bad experiences. Learn to find the positivity in yourself I would say first like do what makes you happy build your own personality and morals try to find what do you want. Like myself I started volunteering in 2 places, working in my studies, watching dramas, listening to music, spending more time with my mom (she used to get angry because I wouldn't stop talking but I was like I don't have anyone else to talk to, she used to say you always say the same things over and over to me but I said because I am excited about that and I like it and guess what she didn't complain I felt very happy after having a good chat with her ). If you don't have anyone to listen to you try ringing samaritans they are always there to listen to you without revealing anything to anyone or judging you they are just there to listen so you should know that sometimes getting things off your chest really helps.
So during my journey, I found that I am always looking forward to getting new experiences, meeting new people and seeing the world from different viewpoints. Even when I was very busy with college work I never stopped going to volunteer as this gives me a kind of happiness also watching dramas really helps me relax as sometimes I cry sometimes I laugh. I also met some amazing people or student room who we still talk about online and I don't feel any kind of awkwardness when talking to them as they don't know me I don't know them we just share common experiences and talk about topics we are interested in. It's fine if you don't have friends maybe it's not the time or like right one for you.

Sorry for the long lines I wrote I just wanted to share my experience with you .I would say just focus on yourself first no personality is bad it's just how we think that reflects in our character . Think positively then every situation can be turned into a positive experience.
Hope this helps
If you need more help or like to talk about it more just pm me.