Anonymous #1
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I've been communicating with this internet boy in the past few weeks and it's like nothing I've ever know.
We've followed each other for years, and had light conversation, but all of a sudden, things got really intense and I really like him now.
He's funny, so intelligent and incredibly witty. Our conversations are like dialogue straight out of a romance movie. He's also so good looking. It feels so unbelievable that I have this connection with a boy.
Here's the catch: He's in his first year of uni all the way across the world, and I'm about to start on the opposite end of the world
I honestly don't know what to do, because I've never been this attracted to someone before, even in real life
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anosmianAcrimony
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How difficult! Could you carry on a long-distance relationship through university and holiday together wherever possible, and then get together properly once you both graduate?
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JGLM
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I've been communicating with this internet boy in the past few weeks and it's like nothing I've ever know.
We've followed each other for years, and had light conversation, but all of a sudden, things got really intense and I really like him now.
He's funny, so intelligent and incredibly witty. Our conversations are like dialogue straight out of a romance movie. He's also so good looking. It feels so unbelievable that I have this connection with a boy.
Here's the catch: He's in his first year of uni all the way across the world, and I'm about to start on the opposite end of the world
I honestly don't know what to do, because I've never been this attracted to someone before, even in real life
Will you be able to get what you want out of the relationship?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
How difficult! Could you carry on a long-distance relationship through university and holiday together wherever possible, and then get together properly once you both graduate?
Honestly, I don't know. I'm quite a physical person. I like cuddles, hugs and kisses and not having the person I want to do all of that to next to me sounds like it would crush me.Physical touch is a huge part of my love langauge
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linedpaper
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Drop it
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JGLM
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Honestly, I don't know. I'm quite a physical person. I like cuddles, hugs and kisses and not having the person I want to do all of that to next to me sounds like it would crush me.Physical touch is a huge part of my love langauge
Then there’s your answer
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by JGLM)
Will you be able to get what you want out of the relationship?
Honestly, I'm not sure, but I know for a fact, that talking to someone so amazing just means I'm going to have such high standards for everyone else that tries to get to know me. I always thought boys wanted to talk about the same things, and the ones that I've spoken to before have the same sort of intelligence level. But he's so different and I don't think I can get that out of my head
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anosmianAcrimony
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Honestly, I don't know. I'm quite a physical person. I like cuddles, hugs and kisses and not having the person I want to do all of that to next to me sounds like it would crush me.Physical touch is a huge part of my love langauge
Ugghhghghghhhh I know exactly what you mean. I’m exactly the same and if I was in love with someone but unable to cuddle them I would die to death.

I would say: give it a good while longer before you commit to anything. It sounds like it’s early days yet and you’ve got a lot to learn about each other. Maybe you’ll run into some kind of dealbreaker and it’ll become an easy decision, who knows.
Last edited by anosmianAcrimony; 1 month ago
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JGLM
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Honestly, I'm not sure, but I know for a fact, that talking to someone so amazing just means I'm going to have such high standards for everyone else that tries to get to know me. I always thought boys wanted to talk about the same things, and the ones that I've spoken to before have the same sort of intelligence level. But he's so different and I don't think I can get that out of my head
What makes him stand out. Be specific.
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black tea
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You have never met the guy. You are idealising him based on the picture that your brain has created, not based on what he is really like.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by linedpaper)
Drop it
i figured that's the right thing to do, because the emotional bond is going to get stronger with no way to develop that and that's just unfair on both of us...but it's so hard to do that. I'll be honest, I'm VERY DOWN BAD, and I know I'm being selfish by enjoying someone I can't have, but more than that I just want to enjoy this one good thing for now
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
Ugghhghghghhhh I know exactly what you mean. I’m exactly the same and if I was in love with someone but unable to cuddle them I would die to death.

I would say: give it a good while longer before you commit to anything. It sounds like it’s early days yet and you’ve got a lot to learn about each other. Maybe you’ll run into some kind of dealbreaker and it’ll become an easy decision, who knows.
Wow thank you, that's actually great advice. I'm trying to play my cards close to my chest because I don't want him to know how much I enjoy his company...admitting it just means it's real and I'm trying to avoid that.
But as much as I try to not develop feelings, he's just so funny and flirty, I can't even remember to distance myself
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by black tea)
You have never met the guy. You are idealising him based on the picture that your brain has created, not based on what he is really like.
My attraction to him is based very very little on what he looks like. There's lots of good-looking guys I've spoken to, but I'm attracted to this guy because of his charisma and humour. Our banter is off the charts and he just balances me out so well (which not a lot of guys tend to do)
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Anonymous #1
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He also makes me blush so much (which I never do!) and it just feels like something so different from what I've experienced before, but I don't know if I'm just in quicksand here. Like I don't think I should've gotten involved with him in the first place because it just fees like I'm in a bind here
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black tea
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My attraction to him is based very very little on what he looks like. There's lots of good-looking guys I've spoken to, but I'm attracted to this guy because of his charisma and humour. Our banter is off the charts and he just balances me out so well (which not a lot of guys tend to do)
I wasn't talking about looks, I was talking about the character your brain has created. In my experience, internet relationships never work out because when people eventually meet in person, they start to see all the negative and incompatible aspects of the other person that never came across when they talked online and the person just doesn't come up to standards of the perfect picture they created in their mind. It's very easy for your brain to fill in the gaps when the only contact you have with the person is what they write or say online.
Last edited by black tea; 1 month ago
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anosmianAcrimony
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Wow thank you, that's actually great advice. I'm trying to play my cards close to my chest because I don't want him to know how much I enjoy his company...admitting it just means it's real and I'm trying to avoid that.
But as much as I try to not develop feelings, he's just so funny and flirty, I can't even remember to distance myself
It’s okay to make it clear that you’re really enjoying being with him and that you’re interested in him. That doesn’t necessarily make it ’’real’’ - you’re still in the talking, flirting, enjoying each other phase. You could even let him know that you’re really worried because you want things to work with him but there is the distance problem.

Or play your cards close to the chest, I dunno. I’m the kind of person who likes to be very open and let them know how I feel but if you don’t roll that way then you do you
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by JGLM)
What makes him stand out. Be specific.
He's followed me for years and picked up on insignificant details or little jokes I've made over time, and now made that up into inside jokes for us. Even when we were just internet friends, he was very supportive of my scholastic pursuits and encouraged me to do so much more. He's very determined to get to know me despite my attempts at being guarded and urges me to conversation (without being pushy or aggressive).
We're both interested in the same field of study and discuss a lot of stuff pertaining to that, so it never feels like I'm boring him or speaking out of my ass. Hes not stingy with compliments or threatened by my aspirations. He takes my jokes very well and even bounces them back. He makes me laugh. like OUT LOUD

We've only been talking for about 2 weeks and this is all I can think of rn so
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
It’s okay to make it clear that you’re really enjoying being with him and that you’re interested in him. That doesn’t necessarily make it ’’real’’ - you’re still in the talking, flirting, enjoying each other phase. You could even let him know that you’re really worried because you want things to work with him but there is the distance problem.

Or play your cards close to the chest, I dunno. I’m the kind of person who likes to be very open and let them know how I feel but if you don’t roll that way then you do you
I might just try that actually
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by black tea)
I wasn't talking about looks, I was talking about the character your brain has created. In my experience, internet relationships never work out because when people eventually meet person, they start to see all the negative and incompatible aspects of the other person that never came across then they talked online and the person just doesn't come up to standards of the perfect picture they created in their mind. It's very easy for your brain to fill in the gaps when the only contact you have with the person is what they write or say online.
Tbh, that's something I've also started to think about, the more I fall for him. What if I meet him in person and he smells bad? Or chews with his mouth open? What if there's no physical chemistry?

Part of me just wants to "enjoy the moment" but I'm also try to prepare my mind for the worst
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theycallmegigi
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(Original post by black tea)
I wasn't talking about looks, I was talking about the character your brain has created. In my experience, internet relationships never work out because when people eventually meet person, they start to see all the negative and incompatible aspects of the other person that never came across then they talked online and the person just doesn't come up to standards of the perfect picture they created in their mind. It's very easy for your brain to fill in the gaps when the only contact you have with the person is what they write or say online.
I would have to disagree. I know of several people, personally who met young and on the internet at long distance and they are in a fulfilling happy marrage.

As far as advice. I think you should wait and see how the relationship starts to progress.
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