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Can a girl have a normal friendship with a lesbian girl?

Made a new friend recently and we click, but she told me she's lesbian and that makes things a bit weird. Simply because I feel like she may have feelings/motives that I don't. I just want a casual friendship but since knowing she's into girls, I get the instinct that she's looking for more and that's why she seems motivated in developing this friendship and has asked multiple times to meet up again. She's also expressed that I'm pretty - I know friends say this to each other but since knowing about her sexuality I take that differently.

It's difficult for me to continue a normal friendship with this in the back of my mind. If it's not going to be possible to have a good and normal friendship with her long term then I'm gonna have to cut this new friendship. Especially because I like my friendships to deep. And it can't be deep if there's other motives involved.

What do you think? Can a girl like me who likes deep connections have a normal friendship with a lesbian girl?

Thanks

Reply 1

Yazomi

21

I think so— I’ve heard straight girl/woman have that deep connection with a straight boy/man before too and they weren’t in a relationship so why can’t it work with lesbian woman and another woman—-

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Yazomi

I think so— I’ve heard straight girl/woman have that deep connection with a straight boy/man before too and they weren’t in a relationship so why can’t it work with lesbian woman and another woman—-

Because a lesbian woman has way less options and many of these women try harder than straight people to find someone they can have. There aren't a lot of lesbian women, and many homosexual people tend to be attracted to straight people.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

I never said they'd get with anyone

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

you're kind of coming across a bit narcissistic (i know you probably dont intend to) but just because she likes girls does not mean she likes you.

i get that you can't help but think she might, but even if she does - if she knows your straight she's not going to pursue that.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Original post by Theloniouss

Definitely not. Homosexuals will try to have sex with anything with a pulse (provided it's the right gender). They are uncontrollable sexual deviants and you should stay well away from them before they force themselves on you. There are literally no documented cases of homosexuals having same-sex friends without trying to force them into weird and unnatural sex acts.

boy i hope this is sarcasm

Reply 6

username4910484

21

Going to put this out here now- I smell :troll:

Reply 7

username5326522

21

*news flash* not every lesbian/bi has a crush on every girl they set their eyes on

(edited 2 years ago)

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

you're kind of coming across a bit narcissistic (i know you probably dont intend to) but just because she likes girls does not mean she likes you.

i get that you can't help but think she might, but even if she does - if she knows your straight she's not going to pursue that.

Anticipated a response like this. I am in no way narcissistic. If you knew me irl you'd know that immediately. I know that just because she likes girls doesn't mean she'll like me. But like I said, I'm getting instincts that she might, and that she's trying to develop the friendship into something more

Reply 9

anosmianAcrimony

20

I think lesbians absolutely can have normal friendships with girls. It seems possible she has some kind of crush on you from how she’s very proactive about wanting to meet up with you and having said you’re pretty - but those things don’t necessarily mean anything. I think the best thing to do would just have an honest chat with her and describe how you feel a bit uncomfortable, and get her help with getting over that. The best reaction here is NOT to just cut all contact with her - that’s way overkill.

(edited 2 years ago)

Reply 10

Theloniouss

Universities Forum Helper

21

Original post by Anonymous

Anticipated a response like this. I am in no way narcissistic.

Just homophobic then?

Reply 11

anosmianAcrimony

20

Original post by Anonymous

boy i hope this is sarcasm

I think it is but it’s in very poor taste - too close to what an actual homophobe might write.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by anosmianAcrimony

I think lesbians absolutely can have normal friendships with girls. It seems possible she has some kind of crush on you from how she’s very proactive about wanting to meet up with you and having said you’re pretty - but those things don’t necessarily mean anything. I think the best thing to do would just have an honest chat with her and describe how you feel a bit uncomfortable, and get her help with getting over that. The best reaction here is NOT to just cut all contact with her - that’s way overkill.

I would want to talk about it with her but I feel like it might make the whole thing more awks by making it feel more serious, if that makes sense

Reply 13

Foxehh

21

Do you also assume every straight guy you know fancies you...

Reply 14

anosmianAcrimony

20

Original post by Theloniouss

Just homophobic then?

I think it’s possible to get a vibe that a friend is into you as potentially more than a friend, without being narcissistic or homophobic.

Reply 15

Anonymous #3

one of my closest friends is gay and i’ll ask her things like “do u like anyone atm” You could do things like this so she knows you’re not interested in her. You could say things like “you and X would be good together” Or you could say you’re interested in a guy called X. so she knows you’re not into her

Reply 16

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

Anticipated a response like this. I am in no way narcissistic. If you knew me irl you'd know that immediately. I know that just because she likes girls doesn't mean she'll like me. But like I said, I'm getting instincts that she might, and that she's trying to develop the friendship into something more

I believe you, i was just saying it comes across like that. But does she know your straight?

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Theloniouss

Just homophobic then?

Always feel sorry for people like you who learn a word and can't stop saying it and using it to describe everything you see, lol

Hearing about 'homophobia' everywhere is getting cringey as hell now