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am I being selfish or should I not let him treat me like this

Ive been dating my bf for about a month now. We live over an hour apart so we don’t really get to see each other that often. Sadly one of his friends passed away this week and we were meant to meet up but he cancelled bc he hasn’t really been feeling like leaving the house. Of course I respected his choice but I can’t deny that I was a bit gutted. Ive been as supportive as I can from a distance and given him his space and all that. But he’s kinda been treating me like I mean nothing and I don’t have any feelings. Today I was talking to him about a problem I had and I understand that it wasn’t a huge deal but he just made fun of it and it hurt me. Then he was like urgh you’re such hard work when I got a little upset by it. I know he’s going through a hard time and I’ve been letting him go through it and accepting that I’m not a priority and even allowing him to be kinda harsh or get annoyed or whatever but it’s slowly building up and it hurts me. Ive tried not to be selfish bc it’s about him rn but I am finding it really difficult. Surely even though he’s going through a hard time he doesn’t need to take it out on me. I don’t know if I’m being selfish here or if I shouldn’t just accept the fact that he’s not really being a great person to me atm. Any advice would help.

Reply 1

anonxasian

You're not being selfish! It is hard losing a friend, my condolences. You should probably talk to him, preferably face to face and not through text. Don't try to be too harsh with him and tell him how you feel, and that it is hard, but it's unfair for him to treat you this way. Maybe you should keep you're distance so he can heal, but of course text him frequently. Whatever happens from there is up to him. Good luck, and I hope this helps :smile:

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by anonxasian

Thank you for your reassurance it means a lot. I probably won’t be able to see him face to face for a couple weeks now bc im going away and we were meant to see each other this week but he cancelled. I have been giving him his distance and trying my best when he wants me but it has sucked a bit. I’ll try and be honest and let him know how I’ve been feeling and hopefully he won’t react badly to it.