The Student Room Group

Why would a guy want to know if you’ve been on a date with someone else?

Me and this guy been talking for ages, I know he likes me and we were suppose to meet up at some point but then 3 weeks went by and he said nothing. After 3 weeks I get a text from him asking how I am doing and what my plans are for that weekend. I told him I was helping a neighbor and he instantaneously assumed I was going on a date “Ahhh fair enough, so you’re going on a date? Hehe”. I eventually explained to him my neighbor is a she and I was helping her out with some stuff. And then he invited me out and so we went lol. But seriously why would he assume that? Was he fishing? Jealous? We’re not exclusive so why would he care?
Reply 1
Ask him.
It's fairly reasonable to want to know if you've got any competitors. Dating someone makes you feel special but if that person's dating more than one person you can feel less special. Strictly speaking if you've made no commitments to him then it's none of his business, but I can understand why he'd ask.
I think he’s just dipping his feet in the water to see if it’s hot or not.
I do think he should have just asked you directly to go on a date..

He’s assuming that because you haven’t talked about it for 3 weeks, he probably thinks you have many other options (which is completely fine). Doesn’t matter if you’re not exclusive or not, if you did have/went on another date with someone, you have to be honest and admit that to him so he knows where you’re at in terms of time.
Reply 4
Original post by CaptainDuckie
I think he’s just dipping his feet in the water to see if it’s hot or not.
I do think he should have just asked you directly to go on a date..

He’s assuming that because you haven’t talked about it for 3 weeks, he probably thinks you have many other options (which is completely fine). Doesn’t matter if you’re not exclusive or not, if you did have/went on another date with someone, you have to be honest and admit that to him so he knows where you’re at in terms of time.

In terms of time what do you mean?
Original post by Anonymous
In terms of time what do you mean?



As in time to make things exclusive with you.
Reply 6
Original post by CaptainDuckie
As in time to make things exclusive with you.

Meaning? If I’m seeing other people that’s gonna trigger him making it exclusive but if I’m not we can keep not being exclusive?
Original post by Anonymous
Meaning? If I’m seeing other people that’s gonna trigger him making it exclusive but if I’m not we can keep not being exclusive?



Yes. If you’re seeing other people there’s either two way he’ll react

A) he’ll give up
B) he’ll want you more

It’s not clear which one he wanted just from your OP. Did you meet him on a dating app? If so then it’ll probably be option B.
Reply 8
Original post by CaptainDuckie
Yes. If you’re seeing other people there’s either two way he’ll react

A) he’ll give up
B) he’ll want you more

It’s not clear which one he wanted just from your OP. Did you meet him on a dating app? If so then it’ll probably be option B.

Yes dating app and actually I’m not seeing other people but even if I was I’d never tell him loool
Reply 9
Original post by CaptainDuckie
Yes. If you’re seeing other people there’s either two way he’ll react

A) he’ll give up
B) he’ll want you more

It’s not clear which one he wanted just from your OP. Did you meet him on a dating app? If so then it’ll probably be option B.


Original post by Anonymous
Yes dating app and actually I’m not seeing other people but even if I was I’d never tell him loool

None of his business unless he asks to be exclusive
Original post by Anonymous
Yes dating app and actually I’m not seeing other people but even if I was I’d never tell him loool



That’s just being dishonest.

Original post by Anonymous
None of his business unless he asks to be exclusive



True, we know this. But best to be honest about it. It’s 2021 lol
Original post by CaptainDuckie
As in time to make things exclusive with you.

Does it mean he isn’t seeing anyone else then? I mean since he’s asking whether I’m seeing people
Original post by Anonymous
Does it mean he isn’t seeing anyone else then? I mean since he’s asking whether I’m seeing people



Probably, yes. Not entirely sure because that was a smooth way to get you to say if you were seeing someone else, played his cards firmly right there ngl.

But I’m leaning more on the yes side.

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