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Sex

I am 19 years old and I have been with my girlfriend for 6 months. 3 months into my relationship my girlfriend said she wasn't ready and we haven't mentioned it since. We've been honest to our friends that we haven't had sex yet when asked. Some of my mates laughed and said "why haven't they had sex yet" and "why doesn't she want to have sex" they though that it was strange that we still haven't done that. Is it odd that at this point in our relationship we still haven't had sex?

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Not at all. It’s your choice. Ask them to stfu
Let her initiate it, ignore your friends, go at your own pace.
Reply 3
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by Anonymous
Not at all. It’s your choice. Ask them to stfu

They keep mentioning it as part of their banter.
Reply 4
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Original post by urlocalinmate
Let her initiate it, ignore your friends, go at your own pace.

They say things like "when is (my name) going to have sex with (my gf)? When he's 30 years old!" and they all laugh.
Original post by Anonymous
They say things like "when is (my name) going to have sex with (my gf)? When he's 30 years old!" and they all laugh.

Set a boundry by gently telling them you are not ok with this kind of behaviour and joking about your private life. If they dont respect it they are *****y friends.
Reply 6
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by Anonymous
Set a boundry by gently telling them you are not ok with this kind of behaviour and joking about your private life. If they dont respect it they are *****y friends.

They will know that I am sensitive about it though. Maybe if I ignore it or laugh along they will stop mentioning it.
U should be able to tell ur friends how u feel about their bantering without feeling like you’re being left vulnerable before a hoard of lions in the process. Banter stops being funny and friendly when it hurts you, and they should acknowledge that. In the meantime, I’d ignore them. You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of for respecting your gf’s boundaries.
Original post by Anonymous
They will know that I am sensitive about it though. Maybe if I ignore it or laugh along they will stop mentioning it.

If i were You i would question the friendship in the first place if you are afraid of them knowing you are sensitive about something. No matter what it is.
Original post by Anonymous
They will know that I am sensitive about it though. Maybe if I ignore it or laugh along they will stop mentioning it.




Nah, that’s like the worse thing you can do.

Don’t let your friends violate you like that man. When they say it again, proper get serious and say “we’re not ready yet, and that we are going at our pace, what’s the issue? mind your business”

See what they say. Don’t do all that laughing along stuff because they will think that you are laughing at yourself. They’re not laughing with you, they’re laughing at you.
Original post by twinklelittlstar
U should be able to tell ur friends how u feel about their bantering without feeling like you’re being left vulnerable before a hoard of lions in the process. Banter stops being funny and friendly when it hurts you, and they should acknowledge that. In the meantime, I’d ignore them. You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of for respecting your gf’s boundaries.

Exactly. It is a great thing this guy respects his gf and doesnt do anything stupid despite people around him pressuring him to have sex with his gf.
Have you spoken to your girlfriend about since then? She might be ready now?
I find it odd that they asked about your sex life in the first place. You should probably find more mature friends.
Original post by Anonymous
Exactly. It is a great thing this guy respects his gf and doesnt do anything stupid despite people around him pressuring him to have sex with his gf.

Why are they pressuring him?
Original post by twinklelittlstar
U should be able to tell ur friends how u feel about their bantering without feeling like you’re being left vulnerable before a hoard of lions in the process. Banter stops being funny and friendly when it hurts you, and they should acknowledge that. In the meantime, I’d ignore them. You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of for respecting your gf’s boundaries.


I agree and I don't think they know how they feel. I think that they feel my situation is a joke to laugh at.
Original post by CaptainDuckie
Nah, that’s like the worse thing you can do.

Don’t let your friends violate you like that man. When they say it again, proper get serious and say “we’re not ready yet, and that we are going at our pace, what’s the issue? mind your business”

See what they say. Don’t do all that laughing along stuff because they will think that you are laughing at yourself. They’re not laughing with you, they’re laughing at you.


Maybe I need to be more serious about it and show that I don't find them laughing at it funny. I do think now that they are laughing at u and treating it as a joke.
Original post by Anonymous
Why are they pressuring him?

Idk ask them lol.
If you mean how? By making him uncomfortable and creating shame around not having sex with his gf.
Original post by Anonymous
Exactly. It is a great thing this guy respects his gf and doesnt do anything stupid despite people around him pressuring him to have sex with his gf.

I'll always respect my gf and I'll wait until she is ready. I won't be pressured.
Original post by YaliaV123
I find it odd that they asked about your sex life in the first place. You should probably find more mature friends.

They are good lads actually but they can be immature sometimes and like to show off.
Original post by Anonymous
Idk ask them lol.
If you mean how? By making him uncomfortable and creating shame around not having sex with his gf.

Perhaps because they think we should have done it by now?

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