The Student Room Group

Arguing over food

My bf took me with him to do his hair. He made me wait 3 hours. After I tell him let’s eat I’m hungry he said he’s not hungry but what do I want to eat.
Then I tell him soup so he parks up and says a resturant does this good soup so he called them to order for collection then he added one on for himself.

As soon as he came off the phone he said to me with attitude ‘wait why are we always ordering food why can’t you just make something I don’t have £30 on me for this’. I was so weirded out because it was so random. Then I said fine as I felt so uncomfortable he said he isn’t even hungry why can’t I just find something to make I said fine cancel it then because I was upset moody and shocked. He then told me to and I said no you’re the one complaining about how I should eat. Then he cancelled it then said how my communication skills are so bad recently and how I have attitude ( the only thing I did is go on my phone when he said I should make something as I felt super uncomfortable ) he then starts raising his voice and swearing while speaking like ****ing this ****ing that’ then says my communication is so bad and I’ve been doing it on purpose. I’m so confused.

I was so pissed Cus I waited 3 hours for his hair to be done and was super hungry.

He then said so what am I going to eat I said don’t worry. Because he shouldn’t worry as he just cancelled the order snd made me feel super uncomfortable then drove off then said ‘I’m not going to beg you like your my daughter’ I said I’m not your ****ng daughter. His daughter is like 5. He then kept speaking and it was getting heated I started to get heated. Then I got out of the car and got an Uber to his house to get my keys then went home.

Am I in the wrong?
Original post by Anonymous
My bf took me with him to do his hair. He made me wait 3 hours. After I tell him let’s eat I’m hungry he said he’s not hungry but what do I want to eat.
Then I tell him soup so he parks up and says a resturant does this good soup so he called them to order for collection then he added one on for himself.

As soon as he came off the phone he said to me with attitude ‘wait why are we always ordering food why can’t you just make something I don’t have £30 on me for this’. I was so weirded out because it was so random. Then I said fine as I felt so uncomfortable he said he isn’t even hungry why can’t I just find something to make I said fine cancel it then because I was upset moody and shocked. He then told me to and I said no you’re the one complaining about how I should eat. Then he cancelled it then said how my communication skills are so bad recently and how I have attitude ( the only thing I did is go on my phone when he said I should make something as I felt super uncomfortable ) he then starts raising his voice and swearing while speaking like f u cking this f u c king that’ then says my communication is so bad and I’ve been doing it on purpose. I’m so confused.

I was so pissed Cus I waited 3 hours for his hair to be done and was super hungry.

He then said so what am I going to eat I said don’t worry. Because he shouldn’t worry as he just cancelled the order snd made me feel super uncomfortable then drove off then said ‘I’m not going to beg you like your my daughter’ I said I’m not your fuc king daughter. His daughter is like 5. He then kept speaking and it was getting heated I started to get heated. Then I got out of the car and got an Uber to his house to get my keys then went home.

Am I in the wrong?

Just speak your mind with him. Don’t stay around people who can’t respect you.
Reply 2
Original post by Markussssss
Just speak your mind with him. Don’t stay around people who can’t respect you.


What do you mean.

Also he was upset about something in personal life maybe that’s why he was being this weird and rude. But sorry I wasn’t having it.

Am I being dramatic ?
Reply 3
Please don’t make it into something. It’s a blessing Ofc some people can’t afford food but. I did ask for advice from this. Thank you.
His behaviour was defo weird. He shouldn't be shouting or cussing at you just for that. After all, he did say yes at first. Though it may be worth finding out if he's having any problems or anything and if so, then helping him. When people are stressed, they usually vent out someone's frustration on someone else. Just give him some time and then go speak to him calmly but make it clear that he made you feel bad and if he has a problem he can talk to you about it anytime rather than hide it.
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
His behaviour was defo weird. He shouldn't be shouting or cussing at you just for that. After all, he did say yes at first. Though it may be worth finding out if he's having any problems or anything and if so, then helping him. When people are stressed, they usually vent out someone's frustration on someone else. Just give him some time and then go speak to him calmly but make it clear that he made you feel bad and if he has a problem he can talk to you about it anytime rather than hide it.


Yes. He is having some personal problems however I’m not a punching bag and I didn’t do anything wrong I was simple hungry and he treated me like ****. I went home crying because I was so weirded out. It was just unnecessary I wanted to spend the night with him too as he’s been upset about things in his life. I wanted to be there for him and he treated me like ****. When I left his car he just drove off so I booked an Uber. But I couldn’t be in the car with him it was too heated.
Did he offer to get you food (ie, you were the one hungry so why weren’t you paying?) and then change his mind?

How did he “make” you go with him to his 3 hour hair appointment?
Original post by Anonymous
Yes. He is having some personal problems however I’m not a punching bag and I didn’t do anything wrong I was simple hungry and he treated me like ****. I went home crying because I was so weirded out. It was just unnecessary I wanted to spend the night with him too as he’s been upset about things in his life. I wanted to be there for him and he treated me like ****. When I left his car he just drove off so I booked an Uber. But I couldn’t be in the car with him it was too heated.

I'd feel the same as you if I were in that situation. It depends how often stuff like this happens to you. If it happens regularly then it's kinda toxic.
Reply 8
Original post by GabiAbi84
Did he offer to get you food (ie, you were the one hungry so why weren’t you paying?) and then change his mind?

How did he “make” you go with him to his 3 hour hair appointment?


No one said who was paying I wanted food he ordered it over the phone and added one for himself rhen said he don’t have money I said I’ll pay. He said why are we always ordering food I should go make something instead. If you read the thread it will be more clear what happened.

I came over to chill with him. He didn’t tell me he had hair appointment so he said to come and I didn’t want to because that’s not what I came for. He kept asking so I just said ok. And it went over time. I didn’t expect it to be 3hrs.
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous
I'd feel the same as you if I were in that situation. It depends how often stuff like this happens to you. If it happens regularly then it's kinda toxic.


He’s never really done something like this. But we do argue like every 3 weeks. He messages me when I go home

It’s funny after u know how I’ve been feeling yet u come and all you have done is fight with me then strum off and leave. Someone else is definitely making you happier. ✌️

I replied with ‘Go to sleep knowing you treat people like **** who come to be there for you whilst you make them uncomfortable for wanting to eat after wasting their whole evening in a salon on you’
Original post by Anonymous
No one said who was paying I wanted food he ordered it over the phone and added one for himself rhen said he don’t have money I said I’ll pay. He said why are we always ordering food I should go make something instead. If you read the thread it will be more clear what happened.

I came over to chill with him. He didn’t tell me he had hair appointment so he said to come and I didn’t want to because that’s not what I came for. He kept asking so I just said ok. And it went over time. I didn’t expect it to be 3hrs.


I did read the thread-that’s is why I asked for clarification….

But yeah neither of you are very good with your communication skills.
Original post by GabiAbi84
I did read the thread-that’s is why I asked for clarification….

But yeah neither of you are very good with your communication skills.


I don’t even feel like that’s the issue. He ordered food on the phone. Nothing else should have happened. It was too unnecessary now both our nights was ruined. And I’m feeling very down...
HAve you spoke to him?
Original post by Jesswhats
HAve you spoke to him?


No should I? We haven’t spoke today. I’m not willing to go back to normal unelss I get an apology.

Is this fair enough ?
Original post by Anonymous
I'd feel the same as you if I were in that situation. It depends how often stuff like this happens to you. If it happens regularly then it's kinda toxic.


Hi , as you said you would feel the same I did. Should I call him or not to?
Original post by Anonymous
Hi , as you said you would feel the same I did. Should I call him or not to?

You're the best judge of that. If you think you're in a good mindset to talk to him and sort it out then go ahead. If you need more time yourself or you think he needs to wait a bit, then don't rush.
Original post by Anonymous
You're the best judge of that. If you think you're in a good mindset to talk to him and sort it out then go ahead. If you need more time yourself or you think he needs to wait a bit, then don't rush.


Well I tried to call him to resolve things. He was swearing while talking like f’ing this and f’ing that. And he said I don’t want to resolve things with him I’m just putting all the blame on him. So yeah it didn’t go well. He said if I wanna act like that he won’t pick up any of my calls. So I won’t be calling.
Reply 17
How can getting hair done take 3 hours and where can you order two take away soups at £30. But based on what you recount I would go for preemptive dumping

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