Dad's saying I'm anorexic/OCD

My dad has never understood my mental health at all, especially when I started to really struggle and then relapsed a few months later.
However, lately, he's really been getting on my nerves.
I've always had a problem with sensory issues, for example, loud noises and bright lights. I also like order, and it annoys me when my parents aren't sitting on the right chairs at the table.
I do have an anxiety diagnosis, but my dad always makes jokes about it and acts as though I choose to be anxious. Along with my liking of order, I also don't like washing the dishes because of the number of germs in there and I do like to keep myself and my surroundings clean. My dad says this is 'OCD' and I don't like it at all. OCD is so serious, how can he just say that in passing? Sometimes my dad says he'll do the dishes because 'his daughter's so OCD and doesn't like germs' and it hurts so much. I know my mum doesn't approve either, I just don't understand why he'd say something like that.
About anorexia, I am a size 10/12 women's size, and I hate it. I'm supposedly tall for my age but I hate being the size I am. I really want to be a 6/8 and I'm changing my diet to do so. Dad's saying that I'm turning anorexic and he's saying to me about everything that can happen with anorexia. Although he does seem more serious about anorexia than OCD, I just don't like it when he just randomly jumps to conclusions about serious mental health disorders. All I want to do is to keep clean and lose a bit of weight, I don't understand the problem.
What do I do?

Reply 1

ThomH97

You start off by saying you have mental health issues, then finish saying all you want to do is "keep clean and lose a bit of weight" as if there's no problem. Do you think your dad has a point that you do have an issue?

What you've described doesn't sound too severe, although getting annoyed if your parents don't sit in the."right" chairs is a bit concerning.

Reply 2

username4910484

Your parents sound as though they aren't very knowledgeable about mental health. It's really unpleasant/ intrusive to have your family pathologies your every single move- I can tell you this from experience.

Do you think they understand how this is making you feel? It might be worth trying to talk to them about this one more time.

Also, are you getting any help with your mental health? Maybe you could ask your clinician to explain your some of your difficulties to your parents, if you felt comfortable that it.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by ThomH97

I don't know, I worry about some things, it just annoys me that Dad has to make a joke of it.
I've been to hospital a couple of times about mental health (not OCD/anorexia related)

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by glassalice

Yeah I do have support, but not over OCD/anorexia. I'm not sure, I'm just worried that they'll get angry

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I don't know, I worry about some things, it just annoys me that Dad has to make a joke of it.
I've been to hospital a couple of times about mental health (not OCD/anorexia related)

A lot of people make offhanded jokes or comments about OCD, and it's perfectly valid to get annoyed; I have a lot of sensory issues and issues regarding routine and things being "right" (like your chairs comment) as a result of being autistic, and people know this yet still call it "your OCD" or tell me "you're so OCD". Obviously it's possible to have both, but I know in my case it's just my autism, and it feels insulting to those people who actually struggle with the condition :frown:

Have you explained to your dad how it makes you feel? I know when my sister does it it's a half joke in an attempt to connect with me about what I struggle with, so she's always fine with me telling her that it makes me uncomfortable (even if she forgets and does it again later).

Reply 6

Surnia

Would you listen if someone on here said you had problems with your body image and eating?

What is you current age, height and weight and what do you think is the weight you want to be? Do you understand a healthy diet and exercise?

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

I would listen. I'm 14, height is 165cm and weight 7.12 stone and I hate it

Reply 8

Sinnoh

Original post by Anonymous

I would listen. I'm 14, height is 165cm and weight 7.12 stone and I hate it

that's right on the edge of being underweight to begin with

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

Original post by Sinnoh

that's right on the edge of being underweight to begin with

Oh. What do I do

Reply 10

ReadingMum

Original post by Anonymous

Oh. What do I do

certainly don't try and lose any more weight. You are a normal height and a size 6/8 would be pretty skinny.
I would try and get some professional help for the 'OCD' or whatever it turns out to be - excessive focus on being clean and not being able to wash up due to germs is going to affect your everyday life if not addressed.

Reply 11

Surnia

As above. At 14 your body is still growing and developing, and you will make yourself ill if you lose weight from what you are.

You won't have the energy to enjoy your hobbies, to meet friends, or go to school, you could start losing your hair, feel the cold more and be prone to injury.

Please get professional medical help.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

That's going through Dad. I'm losing my hair and my parents are aware but they think it's a 'habit' or something. I'm tired of constantly being unwell.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

That means going through Dad. My hair is falling out and my parents know but they think it's a 'habit' or something. I'm tired of constantly going to GPs.

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

But thank you for making me aware

Reply 15

Anonymous #3

Becoming adult in age terms and becoming a parent doesn't make a person magically competent and confident. They're just as much a mess up as the rest of us. Parents struggle with a lot of stress and responsibility, and don't always cope well with it - humour (or an attempt at it) can often be a way of masking fear or confusion. I know that doesn't necessarily help you, but sometimes the perspective of understanding that parents are just fallible frightened creatures desperately trying to hold things together can help lower expectations of them.