I (F21) am a modern languages student about to go into the second year of my course. As a result, I have moved into student accommodation for the first time. I am really not coping well at all, and thus am considering other options like dropping out or changing courses despite liking the one I'm currently doing, due to the fact I have to do a year abroad in third year.
I really love my course - my first year was great as I could study the subject I like from the comfort of my home, surrounded by my family who I feel safe and secure with. I have general anxiety, but my main issue is social anxiety, as well as depression. I started getting therapy in March in my home city but nothing really worked and I just keep getting passed along to more intense therapies (I'm currently waiting for a new therapist). My issues were hugely exasperated by the pandemic, leading to agoraphobia and even worse social anxiety, which then led to spiralling low mood and even worse depression... It just hasn't been a great 18 months for me lol.
However, moving away from that safe space of my home has been almost the nail in the coffin for me. I have had panic attacks multiple times a day in the week leading up to moving. I almost dropped out the night before leaving this weekend, but ultimately decided against such a drastic and sudden choice. But now I'm here. And I just want to be home. I know that everyone says you need to give it time, but my symptoms are so intense and I never feel any relief. I can't shake the tightness in my chest, shaking all over, I can't eat without feeling physically ill, and I can't sleep at night. I haven't met my flatmates yet (to be honest, I have tried but I just keep missing them in the kitchen and I'm scared to knock on their doors). I feel really isolated, and like I've been having an anxiety attack for days. I'm tired. I can't help feeling like maybe although I love my course, this isn't the right time for me to be doing it, especially with a trip to the other side of the world (South Korea) in my uncomfortably close future. I originally applied back in the 2018/19 academic year with deferred entry , in my more mentally stable pre-pandemic state, and I do believe I could've coped back then but now my circumstances are just so different. But currently, I just want to leave or change courses to one similar to mine but without the year abroad so I can commute, yet the chances for regret are so high.
Has anyone else felt like they chose the right course, but it isn't the right time for them to be doing it? Or just have any advice on what you think I should do? I have contacted my department's welfare team about my worries but am waiting on a response.