Desperate

I’m on the verge of having a mental breakdown now.I got rejected from guys twice .Everyone says I’m pretty , have a nice body , I’m in my university’s competitive ballet and contemporary dance team , I’m outgoing with a bunch of friends and I’m attending Scotland’s top university for engineering .These qualities are listed just to show that I’m not the person that has no life and just sits indoors all the time that never socialises and complains about being 20 without being in any relationship .Please do not say I’m young and have plenty of time to find the right person for bc I’m sick of hearing these all the time.I had my first crush at the age of 12 (it was a classmate ) and after months of chatting all the time and going out I decided to confess , and was told to remain friends and how I’m a very cool person etc .I then moved country and attended an different school with very few pupils - my group consisted of 15 people and just three of them were guys , between the ages of 14-19 I only had 2 proper crushes but in both cases the guys were taken and from different cities etc .I’m now living in dorms and fancied my flatmate from the very first day I saw him, who played with me and has rejected a few hours ago saying : you’re cool I like you but I’m a *****y person and in case things don’t work between us we will end up hating and constantly avoiding each other which is hellish as we constantly bump into each other in the flat.Im actually in despair , I was always the person who wanted to establish a long term relationship at a young age , marry that person and stay together till death .With the flatmate we’ve been doing stuff a lot , he was very flirty in multiple occasions (PS he’s 22) that’s why I confessed .Everyhting seemed perfect so far - we have so many things in common , spent hours and hours laughing and talking about life he complimented my appearance several times and my flatmates caught him staring at my ass quite a few times lol.I would love to attempt to get in a relationship with him , but the dream has been crushed 😭😭😭😭😭I know I am young , perhaps quite attractive & fit , with many interests and can literally talk with anyone about everything- from politics to astronomy .I wasn’t expecting to get rejected and it obviously hurts a lot to the point I can’t focus on my assignments anymore because I don’t understand why I can’t ****ing be in a relationship .I wanted to be in one since the age of 12 and I’m still waiting .I hate my life so much 😭I can’t even face my flatmate anymore , he ****ing played with me , misleading me a bazillion times with his messages and actions .even though I pretended to be cool about the rejection I ****ing want to leave the flat and never see him again 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭What sucks more is being 20 , wanting a relationship for so many years but not finding anything😭

Firstly don’t count that first rejection,you were only 12!
Secondly, think about this from a different perspective, if you did end up with your flatmate and unfortunately you broke up, that would be very awkward. Maybe he does like you and is being apprehensive.

Ahh that’s true , but what annoyed me the most is that if indeed he was interested , we could wait till half term in semester 2 , if dates keep being interesting and we both enjoy each other’s company then we could be together towards the end and live apart next year just in case sth unfortunate happens between the two of us ..

Maybe you're trying too hard. I want a long stable relationship but I dont actively look for one because the perfect one will come to me. Sounds philosophical but its true. Also just a side note, idk if its just me but I'm pretty sure most males looking for a long term stable relationship are very good at analysing and quickly getting a picture of the other person and usually stuff like this where the other person is super obsessive or gets attached to people easily can be a big turn off.

Hey you don’t have to listen to anything I’m saying I’m just going to say that first off and I don’t mean any offense by what I’m saying. First of all you seem like a strong, independent woman. Those men can’t see that and that’s honestly sad. But second of all, i know about your dream, but why base it on men? What I mean is, why base your self worth because on the men that sadly don’t like you back? You seem like an amazing person, an amazing dancer, etc! And I’m not going to say what you don’t want to hear, but men can wait, and the perfect one for you just might not be closest to you right now, and that’s ok again sorry if anything was offensive and I hope you feel better, and get a good snack for yourself queen!

hey he might be waiting for the perfect time, he might be thinking of the same scenario!

Honestly I have gone into relationships with the desire for marriage and all that good stuff and it's just ended up playing a role in the failure of the relationship eventually, I think you're better off taking a more laid back approach to all of this.

I hope so even though he said to remain friends which is the last thing one wants to say after confessing 😭

Hm maybe , any tips on how to overcome this ******* even though we live under the same roof and see each other every single day ?

I’m on the verge of having a mental breakdown now.I got rejected from guys twice .Everyone says I’m pretty , have a nice body , I’m in my university’s competitive ballet and contemporary dance team , I’m outgoing with a bunch of friends and I’m attending Scotland’s top university for engineering .These qualities are listed just to show that I’m not the person that has no life and just sits indoors all the time that never socialises and complains about being 20 without being in any relationship .Please do not say I’m young and have plenty of time to find the right person for bc I’m sick of hearing these all the time.I had my first crush at the age of 12 (it was a classmate ) and after months of chatting all the time and going out I decided to confess , and was told to remain friends and how I’m a very cool person etc .I then moved country and attended an different school with very few pupils - my group consisted of 15 people and just three of them were guys , between the ages of 14-19 I only had 2 proper crushes but in both cases the guys were taken and from different cities etc .I’m now living in dorms and fancied my flatmate from the very first day I saw him, who played with me and has rejected a few hours ago saying : you’re cool I like you but I’m a *****y person and in case things don’t work between us we will end up hating and constantly avoiding each other which is hellish as we constantly bump into each other in the flat.Im actually in despair , I was always the person who wanted to establish a long term relationship at a young age , marry that person and stay together till death .With the flatmate we’ve been doing stuff a lot , he was very flirty in multiple occasions (PS he’s 22) that’s why I confessed .Everyhting seemed perfect so far - we have so many things in common , spent hours and hours laughing and talking about life he complimented my appearance several times and my flatmates caught him staring at my ass quite a few times lol.I would love to attempt to get in a relationship with him , but the dream has been crushed 😭😭😭😭😭I know I am young , perhaps quite attractive & fit , with many interests and can literally talk with anyone about everything- from politics to astronomy .I wasn’t expecting to get rejected and it obviously hurts a lot to the point I can’t focus on my assignments anymore because I don’t understand why I can’t ****ing be in a relationship .I wanted to be in one since the age of 12 and I’m still waiting .I hate my life so much 😭I can’t even face my flatmate anymore , he ****ing played with me , misleading me a bazillion times with his messages and actions .even though I pretended to be cool about the rejection I ****ing want to leave the flat and never see him again 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭What sucks more is being 20 , wanting a relationship for so many years but not finding anything😭